A woman has taken to an advice forum to vent about a recent family occurrence in regards to her wedding.
The 27-year-old woman explained that she is engaged to an ‘amazing guy’, but is having a major problem with her mother-in-law – who doesn’t think the bride’s dad should be able to attend the wedding due to his disability.
‘When I was a little girl, my dad was involved in a really bad accident and was burned over a large portion of his body,’ the bride said.
‘He lost part of one limb and has some serious disfigurement. He has been a great dad and I never think about it.
‘A few weeks ago, my fiancé started acting strange when we talked about the wedding.
‘Then his mom called me out of the blue and told me that she didn’t think my dad should come to the wedding.
‘She thinks that he will upset the guests and “traumatise” any children who might be there. She is suggesting that we have a private family ceremony before the big blowout.
‘I got upset and my mom asked why. When I told her, she said that she and my dad understand, which only makes me feel worse.
‘Maybe my future MIL [mother-in-law] had a point, but I would really rather disinvite her than my dad.’
(Picture: Getty)
This awful story was posted to a wedding shaming group on Facebook, where people have been commenting to say how awful the mother-in-law is to suggest that the bride’s own dad shouldn’t attend her wedding.
One person said: ‘That is the most f***ed up thing I’ve ever read, I would throw the man and his whole family away’. Another wrote ‘run because she’s a monster’.
Another user suggested the fiancé should’ve spoken up.
The user said: ‘The fact that your fiancé didn’t immediately tell his mum where to go lest her be uninvited would tell me I was marrying into the wrong family tbh’. [sic]
One woman shared her own story in regards to her dad, who sadly passed.
(Picture: Getty)
She wrote: ‘I lost my father 12 years ago.
‘I still dread my wedding day because he won’t be there to walk me down.
‘F*** your MIL and have your father walk you down. I would give ANYTHING to have him there.
‘Hell, I’d have your dad walk me down if I knew who you are.’
It’s definitely a difficult situation.
Do you think the mother-in-law was in the right or the wrong?
Welcome to You Don’t Look Sick – our new weekly series about invisible illness and disabilities.
There are 13.9 million disabled people in the UK, but for many of them, you would have no idea anything is wrong.
Lots of people suffer from debilitating symptoms and daily struggles but when they are out in public, they are challenged when they use priority seats or disabled parking.
They’re told ‘but you don’t look sick’ because they don’t use a wheelchair or something people associate with disability.
This series is a look at what it’s really like to live with a disability or illness that no one can see, discussing the symptoms that affect their lives every day and how they are treated when they are out in public.
(Picture: James Clarke for Metro.co.uk)
Grace Latter, 25, from East Sussex, has a type of brain tumour – a low grade pilocytic astrocytoma, lodged unusually deep in her left temporal lobe.
She also has mild IBS, sensitivity, pain and PTSD following bowel problems (an infection, then obstruction), which led to her having major surgeries on her intestines.
For Grace, a lack of understanding around what it is like to live with a condition like hers can be very frustrating.
She explains: ‘I really struggle with the friends who say, with complete innocence and good intentions, ‘you look fine to me!’ after I’ve had surgery.
‘I am currently still healing after a reconstruction operation I had back in September to correct a misplaced muscle on the left side of my head, which had given me a noticeable (to me, anyway) dent and bulge on one side of my face.
‘I am still slightly swollen, and one eyebrow is not quite working. I’ve been told to wait six to nine months, but deep down I truly fear it will never go back to ‘normal’.
‘Having friends who cheerily say ‘I wouldn’t have noticed!’ and ‘what are you worrying about?!’ just makes me feel like I’m unjustified in my feelings of intense self-consciousness.
‘I also had friends who’d call it a ‘silver lining’ when I lost two stone after two major bowel surgeries in 2017… that actually made me a little angry, as I was so uncomfortable in my own skin, not feeling like me, and they had somehow decided that the weight loss was a perk.
‘With strangers, I often feel guilty when I’m offered a seat on a busy underground train, but then I really can’t handle the stuffiness or pain of standing and swaying in the carriage for too long.
‘I supported the recent campaign to get the ‘please offer me a seat’ badges into circulation on public transport, because then hopefully less people would feel awkward or selfish asking for a seat and feeling pressured to explain they have an invisible illness.
In 2014, she started to experience a sudden loss of motor skills, increased clumsiness and balance issues.
After months of scans, the tumour was found at the end of May 2014.
She explains: ‘I was relieved when I was diagnosed. Finding out that I had an unusual, unnamed mass in my brain, actually felt like the best reassurance that I wasn’t crazy.
‘I definitely did have something wrong! I genuinely smiled through tears as my dad told me, at a cafe in Waterloo station. He had to do it because for some reason my GP didn’t think to call me.’
What is a pilocytic astrocytoma?
Grade 1 astrocytomas are called ‘pilocytic astrocytomas’.
Pilocytic means the cells are elongated and hair like.
They are slow growing, relatively contained and unlikely to spread to other parts of the brain.
They are also unlikely to return after being surgically removed.
The are most often found in children and young adults under the age of 20 and are equally common in males and females.
They are very rare in adults over 50 years.
They tend to grow in the cerebellum, which controls balance.
They can also occur in the optic pathways, which are involved in sight.
Pilocytic astrocytomas occur in around 10% of people who have ‘neurofibromatosis type 1’ (NF1).
This is a genetic condition you are born with that causes tumours to grow along your nerves.
Since then, Grace has had two craniotomies (operations to remove most of the tumour) in 2014 and 2015.
She had radiotherapy at the end of 2015 and a face reconstruction operation in 2018.
After the second craniotomy, she suffered a CS fluid leak through a hole in her skill into her forehead, causing a water balloon trapped under her skin.
She has now stopped long-term medication but needs regular check ups and is still recovering from her facial reconstruction.
Grace works in retail and as a freelance writer but admits that her condition can still have an effect on her every day.
She said: ‘I am almost constantly aware of my weaknesses.
‘I get frustrated by how little I can do, work-wise – I only work part-time, just a few hours each week, and even then I get easily overwhelmed and exhausted.
Grace after her facial reconstruction ((Picture: Tim Wilcocks)
‘It’s been a long process, recovering from my (many) surgeries and treatments; as they say, it’s not linear, and while you might feel strong and 100% capable one day, you might be slow and stumbling a little the next.
‘One thing is consistent; I am slow to start in the mornings. I wake up and get up just fine, but it takes me a while to get going from there.
‘I’m very fortunate in that I’m not on any long-term medication, and my check ups are now only every six months; I have a scan at my neurological centre, then there’s about a week of scanxiety, then I’ll see my neurosurgeon for the results and a general catch up.
‘I often worry, going into a new job contract, that I’ll be a nuisance for having to book two days off, a week apart, every six months… which I know is hardly going to stress out the managers or affect the rotas, but I still panic about being a high maintenance employee.
‘Maybe because I know how judgmental and marginalising some managers and companies can be, when they find out they have an employee with a chronic illness.
‘In fact, I’ve tried to hide my medical history from colleagues and management in some jobs I’ve had since my first diagnosis in 2014 – which is very stressful for me, and in the end has led to unpleasantness in the workplace.
A scan of Grace’s brain in July 2017, the tumour is the white glimmer in the middle right (Picture: Grace Latter)
‘It’s truly shocking how living with a condition, a pesky thing that is completely out of your control can be so limiting in work; it can stop you being promoted, it can give them reason to dismiss you without warning, it can even prevent you getting jobs in the first place. This needs to change, and soon.’
Since then, as she has a visible scar, she has found that people make more assumptions about her health.
She explains: ‘I get so many double takes and stares – sometimes gormless, other times incredulous – when I walk down the street these days.
‘My craniotomy scar is very noticeable, meaning people stop to look at the woman with a buzzcut (which for some reason is seen as a crazy thing) then continue gawping at the long, hairless and slightly pink line shaped like a question mark across one side of my head.
(Picture: James Clarke for Metro.co.uk)
‘Usually, in all honesty, I relish the astonishment and make a point of smiling at every person I catch staring – and usually, they quickly shut their mouth and smile back – and stick my chin out a little more as I walk tall and proud. Shaving my head was the ultimate confidence boost, because really, when you look like this, you have to own it.
‘The only issue I have with the staring, is when little children loudly ask their parents ‘why has that lady got no hair!?’ and before I can swoop in and happily tell them I shaved it deliberately, the parents shush their kids and explain urgently that ‘she’s been very ill’.
‘It happens more than you’d think, and I am always desperate to correct the parents and thank the kids for taking notice, rather than shut them up and shame them for asking the most inoffensive question.
Throughout her illness, Grace has been supported by her family, some friends and some charities but she has also found a lot of help and reassurance through people she met on social media.
Grace’s brain scan in September 2018. The tumour had reduced (Picture: Grace Latter)
She adds: ‘I am extremely lucky to have the support of not only a loving and very close family, some amazing friends who check in with me regularly and are always primed to boost me up when I need it most, but also I have received endless support from The Brain Tumour Charity for the whole five years since my diagnosis, and more recently charities such as Clic Sargent and Maggie’s Centres.
‘My hospitals have also all been brilliant – and bear in mind, I have been in many hospitals, maybe six or so by my count – and my consultants are just incredible.
‘My support nurses offered me the utmost reassurance and kindness throughout my ‘journey’ with my tumour, and I really felt they were on my side.
‘If I’m feeling low, or worried about something, I can always call one of them, or even a friend at The Brain Tumour Charity, on the Young Adults Team.
‘Social media may have many faults, and the many platforms be very toxic places at times, but I have found so many friends and so much support through some of those mediums.
‘I also get a lot of young people come to me via Twitter or Instagram for help with their conditions or even their friends’ illnesses, as well as advice on being more comfortable in their bodies and living with their health issues.’
You Don’t Look Sick is a weekly series telling the stories of people with invisible illness and disabilities. Next week, we speak to Vickie who has severe asthma.
How to get involved with You Don't Look Sick
You Don’t Look Sick is Metro.co.uk’s weekly series that discusses invisible illness and disabilities.
If you have an invisible illness or disability and fancy taking part, please email youdontlooksick@metro.co.uk
You’ll need to be happy to share pictures that show how your condition affects you, and have some time to have some pictures taken.
Up until four years ago I worked in the corporate world of Finance and IT – then I burned out.
For the first time in my life I started paying attention to what was giving me energy, and what was draining it. This is when I rediscovered my love for art and became a body painter.
This piece contains images of naked bodies being painted
One of the challenges of my job is explaining exactly what it is I do.
‘I paint models in the exact same style as my abstract paintings’ (Photo: Susannah Ireland)
I’m a professional artist and I paint models in the exact same style as my abstract paintings. I then photograph the models in front of the paintings, and frame them in such a way that it is hard to identify where the body ends and the artwork starts.
The focus is on the body, not the face, so that the models can’t be recognised when I sell the photographs online. For the models, it’s exciting and empowering to know that it’s their body in my images, but no one else knows!
‘I wanted to experience new surfaces and learn’ (Photo: Susannah Ireland)
I don’t have a background in art. I accidentally fell into body painting after one of my friends proposed a collaboration: I would use someone’s body as my canvas, and she would document the process.
I wanted to experience new surfaces and learn. After that first session I knew I had found something special and I couldn’t believe how much I loved it.
Luckily for me, I’m a big fan of photography and I had the necessary skills to keep doing it myself. It’s a way for me to make the art I want, as well as to empower ‘real’ models rather than professional models with ‘perfect’ bodies.
‘Every one of my body paint sessions starts with a getting-to-know-you conversation’ (Photo: Susannah Ireland)
Every one of my body paint sessions starts with a getting-to-know-you conversation, in which I explain more about myself and try to understand why the model is interested in a body paint experience.
Next we discuss the backdrop, which, depending on the package they choose, they are able to pick themselves.
After having buttered their bodies with thick body butter to protect the skin, it is time to apply the first layers of paint on my model. I build up layers, just like I do on my canvas.
‘I build up layers on the skin just like I do on my canvas’ (Photo: Susannah Ireland)
Once we’ve finished the body painting, the final step is to photograph the model in front of the artwork that I’ve created beforehand. I capture close-ups of the body and backdrop, tricking the eye as to where the body ends and the artwork starts.
The entire process takes up to three hours. After editing, the models receive their photos within two weeks of the session.
For the models, it’s quite a meditative activity. You don’t know what’s happening to your body until you see yourself fully painted. People seem to let go of all their expectations and just let it happen.
‘The final step is to photograph the model in front of the artwork’ (Photo: Susannah Ireland)
Because I’m not classically trained, I feel all the freedom in the world to follow where my energy takes me and create without textbook limitations.
What started as an experiment for me has now become something bigger, a way of turning female bodies into living works of art to help all generations of women remember how beautiful they are.
Seeing women grow in confidence by turning vulnerability into strength during a session is a wonderful thing to witness. Most ladies who book a session are either very aware of their bodies and want to experience it in a different way, or are not very tuned into their bodies and want to grow a closer relationship with their physical selves.
‘What started as an experiment for me has now become something bigger’ (Photo: Susannah Ireland)
As well as booking sessions in my studio, I do live body paint performances during art fairs and exhibitions, both nationally and internationally.
I’m also currently working on video material to visualise my process, for people to understand what body painting can do for them.
Next up is The Other Art Fair in LA and a collaboration with an exclusive boutique hotel in London. My dream is to work with big brands, turning their campaigns into one big artwork, models and products included.
I’m often asked whether I had anxieties leaving the corporate world behind. To be honest it felt like the only right decision for me and I hope to inspire others to take up what I do.
And for anyone who thinks ‘do I dare book a session myself?’ I’d say got for it – your life is amazing, and it’s made for living.
Body painting sessions with Anne-Claire can be booked through Airbnb Experiences.
How to get involved with My Odd Job
My Odd Job is a new weekly series from Metro.co.uk, published every Sunday. If you have an unusual job and want to get involved, email aimee.meade@metro.co.uk.
If you’re a The Office US fan, you might remember Michael Scott giving CPR to a dummy to the Bee Gees ‘Stayin’ Alive’.
It was a hilarious failed attempt, but one little girl has shown us how it’s done – using the popular children’s song Baby Shark.
Dad and CPR instructor Chris Pietroforte, from California, has taught his three-year-old daughter Saige to do CPR using the song, and has filmed it on camera.
Saige has been able to perform CPR properly since the age of two, and demonstrated it on a test-dummy in a video that Chris shared online.
(Picture: Chris Pietroforte)
He posted it on the Central Valley CPR Facebook page a month ago, captioning it: ‘If this beautiful 2 year old can learn CPR/AED, what’s stopping you?’
In the clip, Saige is dressed in a matching pink T-shirt and trousers.
As a tape gives her verbal instructions, she performs chest compressions and breathes into the Dummy’s mouth.
Chris told Inside Edition that he taught his daughter CPR by picking a song Saige likes – in this case Baby Shark so she knows what beat to give the compressions to.
(Picture: Chris Pietroforte)
He said: ‘Any song that’s between 100 to 120 bpm, you can do it to.’
Saige is so great at CPR that she even attends her dad’s classes to help adults learn how to do it – despite only being three years old.
Chris said: ‘She actually goes to all my classes when I teach and she demonstrates how to do it.
‘So she’s in there and I tell people that if they can’t outdo her, they won’t pass, and that’s actually happened a couple times. I had someone drop out of an EMT class because she outdid him and he was embarrassed and he left because he didn’t wanna be outdone by a two-year-old.
‘My goal is to get as many people out there trained. The more people trained, the better it is out there for society,’ he added.’
Planning the perfect proposal, if there’s such a thing, is no easy feat.
One man thought he had it all mapped out; he flew his girlfriend to southeast Asia to celebrate three years of being together, he took her to see Angkor Wat in Cambodia, which was on her bucket list, and at the end of the day, they went back to the hotel and he proposed.
And although she said yes straight away, she went away to shower for a bit, came back, and said she had to take back her yes.
You might wonder why she decided to not marry him – was it too soon? Was he not the right guy for her? Did she simply not want to be married?
Well, it was none of those things. She just didn’t want to be proposed to in a hotel room.
And now, he said, he’s wondering whether to break up with her or not as he’s been hurt by her candour.
(Picture: Getty)
‘After a long day of hiking in the heat through ruins [of Angkor Wat] we retired back to our hotel and when we were alone together I proposed and she said yes,’ he wrote.
‘We kissed and I had planned to take her to the waterfall the next day to celebrate. She took a shower and I laid in bed thinking what an amazing day I just had and how I would get to spend the rest of my life with the women I loved.
‘When she came out of the shower however she was in tears. She handed me back the ring saying she couldn’t accept it because she didn’t want her memory of my proposal to be in a hotel room.’
‘I played it cool and said I understood but truthfully it hurt,’ he added.
‘It seems to me that I had offered her something of value. A lifelong commitment and partner. I took her halfway around the world and helped her cross off something she had wanted to do most of her adult life.
‘I felt that if she valued me it wouldn’t matter that the proposal wasn’t exactly what she wanted. It was me and our future together she was saying yes to and not my delivery.’
He revealed that she wanted another, better proposal whereby she would say yes but he admitted he was done. He was open to have her propose to him but was not planning to get down on one knee again himself.
(Picture: Getty)
Asking fellow Redditors what he should do, he received almost the same advice from everyone. They told him to have a conversation with his partner and tell her that it doesn’t matter where the proposal happens, as long as they both love each other enough to want to be married.
Naturally, many people shared their own little imperfect proposals and how it all became a fond memory.
One woman wrote how her now-husband decided to ask her to marry him mid food sickness and vomiting all over the house. But she still said yes.
‘The place and the circumstances shouldn’t matter as much as the person and the life you’re planning to build together,’ she added.
The Harry Potter books have been read by kids and adults across the world.
But for some people reading isn’t as straight forward – but that doesn’t mean they should miss out on becoming immersed in the story.
In an effort to make the Wizard World accessible for everyone, Bloomsbury Publishing, the company who publish the books, has released a range of books that have been adapted for people with dyslexia.
The books have large dyslexia friendly fonts, tinted paper for glare reduction and maximum contrast, clear captions and detailed descriptions to accompany each illustration.
The range includes the companion books The Tales of Beedle the Bard, Quidditch Through the Ages and Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them, but according to Pottermore, plans for similar editions for the main series could to be announced.
According to Pottermore: ‘Each of the three companion novels to the classic Harry Potter series features J.K. Rowling’s complete, original text as well as gorgeous jacket art by Jonny Duddle and stunning line illustrations by Tomislav Tomic.
‘Bloomsbury have collaborated with trusted experts in dyslexia, sight impairment and accessible formats to ensure that this re-presentation of the beloved Hogwarts Library is inclusive and user-friendly.’
Each book has also been approved by the Royal National Institure for the Blind.
A spokesperson told The Bookseller: ‘We’re delighted to have worked with Bloomsbury in reviewing the large print editions of the three Hogwarts Library books.
‘We hope that these projects will encourage other publishers to follow in their footsteps and expand the market of accessible and inclusive books.’
The hardback editions cost £18 and are on sale now.
I had my heart set on walking the runway, but as a trans man of colour who is under 6 foot, it was always going to be a massive challenge (Photo: Getty Images)
During London Fashion Week (LFW) 2019, I had the chance to make my own category.
I signed to UGLY models in 2012 when they had a open day casting models from all walks of life. I thought being on camera would boost my self-esteem and my confidence blossomed as my masculine features became more defined.
I’d always had my heart set on walking the runway, but as a trans man of colour who is under six foot, it was always going to be a massive challenge – but hey, I love a challenge. Then earlier this year, I received an email from UGLY saying that street wear brand DB Berdan had seen my portfolio and requested me to walk the runway for their show in LFW.
A few days before the show I had a fitting and I was good to go!
LFW has grown to accept more diversity in models. Spring 2019’s London shows featured 36.2 per cent models of colour, and 16 trans women and non-binary models, yet only two of those were people of colour, so it’s safe to say that someone of my circumstance was in a tiny minority.
In fact, the only show I know that has displayed trans men was the underwear brand Marco Marco, which chose only transgender models to rock the runway during New York Fashion Week – pretty damn cool.
When my own big day arrived, I was feeling confident but nervous. I knew I’d be the odd one out, the ‘little guy’ in the room, but breakthrough moments like this are what make my career as a trans activist worthwhile.
I stepped into a room full of makeup artists, hairdressers, barbers, photographers and stylists. This was a whole new world to me – I felt like I walked into a movie scene. I had no clue who to approach so I just wandered around taking in all the beauty around me.
Nobody looked at me twice, and they were definitely not expecting me to be a model. I might as well have been invisible. Then the owners of DB Berdan found me, gave me a big hug and told me how grateful they were for my contribution to their runway debut. Realising I hadn’t be made up, they rushed me over to makeup, saying ‘he’s one of our best models!’
Next thing I know I’m being bounced from station to station to the fitting area. I loved my outfit: a black and white two-piece with a massive overcoat that gave me that bossy look!
We were told to walk to the runway slowly, giving the press and photographers a chance to interact with us.
I put my game face on, heard ‘Ready? Go!’ and turned that corner like I was made for this (Photo: Kenny Ethan Jones)
I approached the line-up and saw camera flashes left, right and centre. I could feel the adrenaline rushing around my body, my nerves on high alert, meanwhile I was telling myself I practiced for this, I deserve this, I’m ready.
I put my game face on, heard ‘Ready? Go!’ and turned that corner like I was made for this.
The lights and eyes all hit me at the same time, and I felt this was truly my moment to shine. I wanted my walk to embody how I felt – strong.
I approached the end of the runway and pulled my signature pose, a little pimp of the shoulder and turned with swag. Before I knew it, it was all over. I couldn’t stop smiling, thinking: I did that. What an experience!
I couldn’t believe I had finally walked the runway representing my community.
I believe that fashion is making slow progress towards inclusion but we still have a long way to go. Fashion needs to be more open and less of a popularity contest. Everybody deserves to be a part of the industry if they put in the work.
Having a diverse range of models on the runway will naturally cause a positive change, allowing everyone to focus on being their authentic self without the need to compare ourselves to one another.
I also think that if more young people can see themselves represented in the models, they will have the encouragement and confidence to think ‘I can make it’.
If I had to pass a message on to my younger self it would be this: your situation is what makes you unique, not what defines you or your ability to succeed.
You have a different perspective of the world and an important message to tell so don’t focus on trying to fit in when you were born to stand out.
I’m sure that some people who hear my story believe I’ve suffered the misfortune of being a trans man but the truth is I thrive in difficulty.
My life’s work is dedicated to making the world a better, more inclusive place. In times of struggle I remember that while I have a lot going against me, I have enough going for me.
Twins almost always have some sort of bond. And usually, they’re pretty close.
When those twins share the same amniotic sac within their mother’s uterus, they may feel even more close, having shared the first home together.
These sets of twins who share the same amniotic sac (unlike in other pregnancies where they have separate sacks) and the same placenta are called monochorionic monoamniotic twins.
This can be dangerous as the foetus gets its food through the placenta, so if they are sharing, it may lead to unequal nutrition being shared.
Ann Le from Melbourne, Australia, is one mother who was told she would be having monochorionic monoamniotic twins. Her children were also unfortunately born 12 weeks early which posed additional risks.
Thankfully though, Ann’s two daughters arrived safely into the world.
Due to some complications after birth, the two girls, Zoe and Olivia, were separated for 27 long days.
When they were first bought together, they even embraced one other and a picture caught the perfect moment.
Ann and her husband Jason Poon knew their pregnancy was high risk as the girls would be monochorionic monoamniotic twins, a rare condition in which twins are always identical, share the placenta and the amniotic sac, but have two separate umbilical cords.
Monoamniotic twins develop when an embryo doen’t split until after the formation of the amniotic sac at about 9-13 days after fertilisation.
These pregnancies are usually high risk and can lead to umbilical cord complications, abnormal amniotic fluid levels, low birth weight, or even Twin-Twin Transfusion Syndrome, when abnormal blood vessel connections form in the placenta and allow blood to flow unevenly between the babies.
When Zoe and Olivia’s heart rate became erratic before their delivery, Ann had to get an early emergency caesarian.
After being born, the girls weighed a mere two pounds and had to be rushed to the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit for 27 days where they were treated separately.
‘Unfortunately, because they were so little, I missed out on immediate skin-to-skin with them as they had to be taken to intensive care for breathing support, Ann wrote on her Instagram.
‘But I knew this coming into surgery and was just happy they were alive and kicking. 27 days after birth the girls finally got to meet. Zoe immediately went in for the hug.’
On International Women’s Day, Ann wrote about her daughters and how strong they were.
They are still not allowed to go home but may be allowed to do so in April when they were supposed to be born. However they also have to now have heeart surgery which could derail their home delivery.
Mum Ann is hopeful that the girls will be fighting through it all.
She wrote: ‘Today is International Women’s Day. Our strong little women have had a tough start to life but they are little fighters who keep pushing through.’
Do you peel the skin before chopping up the chunks inside.
Maybe you prefer to pay extra pre-chopped or canned pineapple to avoid all that mess.
Chances are though, you’re probably missing out on this hack to get chunks from a whole pineapple in seconds.
Instead of chopping and peeling the fruit (let’s be honest, it’s a lot of effort), this video shows how you can peel chunks out in sections because of the way the fruit grows.
The video, posted on Twitter by Dennis Naghizadeh shows someone grabbing a spine on the outside of the pineapple and pulling it upwards, leaving a juicy chunk for them to eat the the core in the middle.
The pineapple looks like it actually grows in segments, a bit like an orange.
Dennis added: ‘Wait, what? The whole time? The whole time!? THE WHOLE TIME!’
Tried this today and it didn’t come apart like this! So now I am going to have to increase my sample size and keep testing. Eating that much pineapple maybe I can test some other myths😬 https://t.co/frpOjjwk0v
Some speculated that it might only work with riper pineapples but it’s got to be worth a try for some sweet pineapple chunks without all the fuss of peeling and chopping.
‘I have been sent hundreds of drawings, from professional artists and pre-schoolers alike’ (Illustration: @ronald_2008)
In 2011 the London riots were coming close to where I lived in Tottenham. I joined Twitter to see what was going on. It was my first time on any social media and I didn’t really understand it.
The riots ended and I found myself still on Twitter with no idea how to use it. I tried tweeting. No one responded. It was like shouting into space.
I decided to leave. Just before pressing ‘delete’ on the app, I found myself typing this description of my surroundings: ‘Sitting in my quiet night-time garden by the softly soothing glow of my little solar lamp. Lovely.’
It was fun fitting what I could see into the space of a single tweet.
Suddenly my phone lit-up: a small flurry of responses to what I had just written. I wasn’t alone!
I started by posting these descriptions on Twitter just for myself – a place to put my thoughts (Image: Miranda Keeling)
I’ve always enjoyed observing things: the way someone walks, a dog waiting for their owner outside a post office in the rain. I started by posting these descriptions on Twitter just for myself – a place to put my thoughts.
Ever since then I’ve been tweeting about what I see: people in cafes and on buses; pigeons in the park; a hat left lying in the rain. I enjoy trying to describe what I’m looking at so clearly that anyone reading it can feel like they are seeing it through my eyes.
One day I looked at my follower count and realised that I had over 12,000 followers from all over the world.
I interact with my followers a lot. Sometimes they send me their observations of everyday life and when I read them I am transported – to Walthamstow, Germany, Japan. The more ordinary the thing they describe, the more clearly I see it.
When I asked my followers why they read my tweets, the same themes came up again and again: ‘To see the magic in the everyday’, ‘To be reminded to notice the little things’, and ‘To remember to be present’.
Those answers were a relief because it’s why I write them. There’s a beauty in the everyday which is best described simply, and I just really enjoy doing it.
‘There’s a beauty in the everyday which is best described simply, and I just really enjoy doing it’ (Image: Miranda Keeling)
Each observation teaches me about myself and what I notice: I see a woman laughing as her umbrella turns inside-out in the rain and I wish I responded to those sorts of situations with her lightness.
I write everywhere, and carry a small notebook so as not to miss the little things as they happen. In turning them into a tweet I have a chance to share an experience – to transmit and preserve a tiny moment of beauty, or comedy, or sadness, and allow others to pass them on, or respond. And respond sometimes in unexpected ways.
Sitting on a train one day in 2013, I wrote this: ‘A woman on the tube, her beautiful silver hair cascading in waves over her vivid red cape, nods to herself as she reads a book about tigers’.
And the artist Welbeck Kane tweeted me an illustration of my post in response.
‘I see an image, I put it into words, and they change it back into pictures’ (Illustration: Welbeck Kane)
Suddenly I saw my world through his eyes, and I loved it. Since then I have been sent hundreds of drawings, from professional artists and pre-schoolers alike.
I see an image, I put it into words, and they change it back into pictures, adding their own unique perspectives in the process. I feel privileged that something I’ve described has this effect.
By itself, each observed moment has only a little impact but shared, illustrated, and riffed-off, each has a larger echo. And, seen together, a picture forms a piece of everyday life that is pleasing and complete.
That it is happening online is important. It’s so direct – people can respond in real time as they feel something.
When I think of all the people enjoying my little observations with me I feel like the huge world is a smaller place – we are noticing identical moments in our own ways.
It’s like being part of a community. Thousands of people who will never meet finding joy in the little things. I love knowing that I’m part of many shared moments of mindfulness.
‘This unplanned project has taken off in a way I could never have imagined’ (Image: Miranda Keeling)
Next month I get to bring a little bit of this shared project into the ‘real’ world with an exhibition of artworks inspired by my observations in Tottenham. It feels right to hold it in a space that is at the heart of my local community.
From that first tweet about my garden, this unplanned project has taken off in a way I could never have imagined.
I think of it like a jigsaw of gathered moments that invites everyone to contribute their own piece.
It’s teaching me about a shared love of what makes us human, and about how to stop amidst the chaos of life and find a little bit of calm. When people stop and focus in on the mundane, small details of life, they often find an unexpected antidote to the fury, panic, polarised fear, bad news and bots of modern communication.
Just the act of noticing connects us to the present moment.
Follow Miranda at @MirandaKeeling. The Little Things Exhibition runs until the 31 March. For more information, visit cravingcoffee.co.uk
If you’re going to have anal sex, there might be some poo involved, everyone knows it.
One woman even has a ritual to ‘clean out’ her bum before any backdoor sexiness to avoid that altogether.
However, after one slightly drunk date, she forgot to do her usual ritual and things got, well, a bit messy. But you already knew that’s where this was going.
The woman, anonymous for obvious reasons, wrote to Australian site Mamamia, about the dating mishap which ended up with poo and leaves all over her bed.
She began: ‘You know that feeling when you meet someone and you really like each other and then you both get drunk and they stay over and you have sloppy drunken sex and then suddenly there is human poo in your bed and the magic gets a little bit destroyed forever?’
And of course, she delivered. Poo and all.
After drinking lots of Chardonnay, the couple decided to go back to her apartment where, she told him, he should f*ck her in the ass which he thought was a sensational idea.
But when he decided to have a shower before it all began, chaos ensued.
(Picture: Ella Byworth for Metro.co.uk)
The woman wrote about how her plans to douche herself had been ruined by her date being in the bathroom. So she filled up a water bottled, squirted the water up her bum and realised she had nowhere to expel the contents.
‘I gingerly crept out into my tiny courtyard, which backed onto the shower and very quietly, in the dark, expelled whatever demons lay in my colon,’ she wrote.
‘I could see his lovely face through the window and I was terrified he would turn 37 degrees to the right to look out the window and clock me crouching in the dark like a maniac doing god knows what. But, small mercies, he did not.
‘I ran back into the bedroom and posed seductively on the bed.
‘We began to have extremely sexy sex. For two minutes. Until we both fell into a deep, boozy sleep. No backdoor action at all. All that effort was for nada.’
But then in the middle of the night, the date decided to have a smoke in the garden. And when he smokes, he paces up and down.
‘I had just drifted off the sleep again when I heard him get back into bed. Then I felt something wet and squelchy on my leg.
‘That’s weird, I thought. Then I smelt something a bit pooey.
‘But then the smell got stronger and I peeled back the [covers] and my leg was covered in shit. Oh god, I thought, did I shart in the night?
‘Then I saw leaves in the bed too. All through the bed. It was carnage. Leaves and shit everywhere.
‘He started squealing and I started squealing. We were shocked, dismayed, revolted and then….
‘I remembered. I pooped in my backyard.’
She realised that the date must have stepped in her poo and got back into bed with it stuck to his feet.
She somehow managed to convince him, however, that it was possum poo. The two of them then stripped the sheets, had hot showers, and decided to never talk of it again.
Jackson Garwood was diagnosed with a fatal condition called KRABBE disease when he was nine months old.
His parents Darren, 37, and Rebecca, 34, were told he probably wouldn’t live beyond the age of two.
Devastated by the diagnosis, Darren wanted to make sure his only son would not be forgotten.
He started writing books featuring Jackson as a superhero and after three months, he has now completed 10 books and has had them published.
Darren, a site inspector from Tilbury, Essex, said: ‘Our lives came crashing down when Jackson was diagnosed, I tried to blank it all out.
‘We were told he was only supposed to live until he was two.
‘I wanted to stop thinking, I wanted to sleep and never wake up.
‘But my wife, Rebecca made me realise – all Jackson has is us, and I needed to be there.
‘She asked me if I thought he dreamt – and we wondered what he dreamt about.
‘I decided from that to write Jackson Superhero – he might not be able to do much – the condition affects everything including his brain – but I can help him dream by reading to him.
Jackson with one of the books (Picture: Caters News)
‘The books really don’t take long to write, a few days at most and I always like to use words that Jackson is familiar with.
‘I sent them off to publishers last February and was published by October 2018, I was thrilled when I’d sold 4,000 copies by Christmas.
‘I’ve so far written 10 ‘Jackson Superhero’ stories, with the next one, ‘Jackson’s solution to the world’s pollution,’ due out in May 2019.
‘Since they were published, the most amazing thing is that there’s kids who want to be like Jackson now.’
Jackson’s condition has caused his nervous system to degenerate and symptoms include irritability, choking, seizures along with loss of developmental and motor skills.
There can also be signs of blindness, paralysis, weight loss and unexplained fevers.
Born in August 2014, Jackson developed normally until he reached nine months when he stopped hitting his milestones and lost the ability to complete previously learnt skills – such as being able to feed himself and picking up his dummy.
After being transferred to Great Ormond Street, his heartbroken parents were informed that Jackson was only the third case the hospital had seen in 25 years.
Since the diagnosis, Jackson’s mum, Rebecca Garwood, a recruitment agent, has only been able to work one day a week – but Jackson has defied expectations, as he now approaches his fifth birthday.
Darren Garwood, 37, from Tilbury, Essex, with his son Jackson reading one of his books (Picture: Caters News)
The family – who have since welcomed two-year-old daughter Seren – now take each day as it comes.
Darren added: ‘Doctors no longer know how long Jackson has got to live.
‘No child has gone this far, but the more research I’ve done, I’ve heard of a little boy who lived for eight years.
‘Creating ‘Jackson Superhero’ books means that although he may have lost his smile, I can make him happy by reading to him.
‘He now sleeps properly, despite his chest and water infections, the fact he can’t move or speak.
‘He’s in a body that doesn’t work but whilst he might not be able to be a walker, the books mean he can sprint around the world in his sleep.
‘I want everyone to remember Jackson when he’s no longer here.
‘We had a little sister for Jackson – and I want her to know who Jackson was, and what he was like.
‘Writing these books, reading them to him has turned something terrible into something liveable.
‘It makes you see that ultimately humanity is good – I need to not be angry and sad.
‘These books are never ending – they are his dreams and the books are our escape.
‘I’ve got plenty more planned such as Jackson’s solutions to the world’s pollution and I’m determined – my Jackson will have a legacy.’
Married couple Elliot and Nathanial Green decided to expand their family by adopting a cat so they went to an adoption event held by a local animal shelter.
Before they went to the Lynchburg Humane Society in Virginia, U.S, the couple knew they wanted a Siamese cat.
But all the Siamese ones had already been adopted or were on hold. The couple thought they were out of luck.
That is until a blind kitty called Merlin showed an interest in them.
Merlin was a little kitten when he was brought into the shelter, in need of medical attention and a loving home. He was born mostly blind and very petite in size.
When Elliot and Nathaniel went to the medical wing to see Merlin, the two-year-old ball of fluff immediately came towards them despite not being able to see them.
He began sniffing them and curling up in Elliot’s arm to show he liked them straight away.
‘When Merlin cuddled up against me, it was obvious right away that he was the perfect one,’ Elliot told Love Meow. ‘He was ready to just be with people and be adopted.’
Elliot with Merlin (Picture: Elliot Green)
The stunning creature, with black and white fur and piercing grey eyes, navigates space by his sense of touch, smell, and hearing.
Merlin has already become used to his new home and mapped out the area so he knows where he’s going.
‘The first thing he did was sniff around and get used to the area,’ said Elliot, a photographer.
‘Merlin has never had a problem with his surroundings and that has always impressed me. He tends to put his paw out first to get a sense of whether or not an object is in front of him but once he’s been in a room he’ll remember everything,
‘He is the most relaxed cat I’ve ever met. All he wants is just food and to cuddle.
Dads to Merlin, Elliot and Nathaniel (Picture: Elliot Green)
‘I cannot stress how much this cat wants to be cuddled. His favourite thing to do is probably be acknowledged. That or eating.
‘He loves going on walks and meeting people and sniffing everything and anything. But at the end of the day, he always comes back to our laps.’
If you work in an office then chances are you will have had at least one food item stolen from the fridge (RIP, hummus, gone too soon).
But if it keeps happening, as it did with this pregnant woman, you’ll probably want to report it to HR.
The woman in question had her lunch, which was lovingly made by her chef husband, stolen every day. So she politely left a note to say that if the person wanted a chef-made lunch every day, her husband was willing to make it for them, provided they pay.
A few people in the office, not the thief themselves, decided to get in on the offer and get the chef to make them lunch too.
And yet the lunch thief continued to target the pregnant woman’s lunch which came in a special non-plastic microwavable container.
Despite telling the thief she was pregnant and needed to eat certain nutritious food and that HR was now involved, the brazen thief kept nicking the grub.
That is until cameras were installed, catching the thief in the act. It turned out to be an older woman in a senior position who was up for a promotion.
Except instead of getting the promotion, she was fired.
(Picture: Getty)
‘I began labeling my food hoping that would deter the thief. It didn’t. Eventually, I put a note on the fridge that said: “Please stop taking my food. I am pregnant and breastfeeding and this is negatively affecting my health”,’ she wrote on Reddit.
‘The thief was a middle-aged woman who doesn’t seem to like me. She is making triple what I am making, if not more.
‘After a week of this (I’d been bringing sandwiches and keeping them at my desk to hold me over) I had the IT guy send me a screen-grab of her stealing, one from each day.
‘Lunch Thief was up for a promotion. She’s near the executive level, and once you get this high up, the interviews involve execs from headquarters flying down to meet up with the execs in our office to sit in on presentations from the interviewees.’
The poster revealed that she sits in on these meetings to take notes and flip through the presentation slides. When it was time for the lunch thief to go on, the poster put up a picture of her stealing the food.
‘She (food thied) turned back to look at the screen in horror. The execs at my office who knew my lunches were getting stolen were visibly pissed at her. As it turns out, one of the execs who’d come from headquarters was also pregnant, and the other one had a wife who’d just had a baby.
‘She was terminated.
‘I didn’t want her to get fired, I just wanted her to stop. If they’d ever talked to me, I wouldn’t have wanted to get her fired. Aside from seeing the picture in the interview, they never involved me further. Never even asked me to send them the picture evidence for their own record.’
She asked for advice on Reddit thread ‘Am I the a*sehole?’ and almost everyone said no. Most felt that the senior member of staff shouldn’t have been stealing in the first place and should’ve stopped, especially when she learned the person she was stealing from was pregnant.
One person wrote: ‘You didn’t get her fired. She got herself fired by being a thief despite many opportunities to stop and not get punished.’
Staff at an animal shelter are looking for a ‘guide human’ to adopt an unlucky dog that suddenly went blind overnight.
Alex, a four-year-old terrier, arrived a Dogs Trust in October and soon became a hit with rescue centre staff.
But a short while later they noticed Alex was walking into things so he was sent to the vets.
It was then confirmed Alex had gone blind as a result of detached retinas – with vets saying his eyesight would tragically never return.
Now, staff members at the Dogs Trust Evesham, in Worcestershire, are trying to find a home for Alex – and say his new owners will have to act as ‘guide humans’.
Emma Rex, training and behaviour advisor at Dogs Trust Evesham, said: ‘It was such a huge shock to us to hear that Alex had gone blind.
Alex, the four-year-old terrier who went blind overnight (Picture:Dogs Trust / SWNS.com)
‘It must have been confusing for him initially, but he has adjusted so well and certainly hasn’t let his blindness hold him back.
‘Knowing he was blind enabled us to make things in his daily life much more predictable so he’s much happier’.
‘For example, we’ve applied lavender oil to his harness so he’s learnt to recognise when it’s near his head – and then he gets to go for a walk!
‘We’ve also taught him to lift his paw when there’s a step in front of him so he doesn’t trip over and because he loves to play, we’ve got him some balls with bells inside so he can hear them and knows where they are.
‘These little considerations have made him a happy dog and really helped him to adjust quickly.’
Alex, the four-year-old terrier with carer Jackie (Picture: Dogs Trust / SWNS.com)
The team are looking for the right home with owners who will continue to help him adapt, and hope that his lack of eye sight won’t put off any potential adopters.
Emma added: ‘While Alex has quickly learnt to use his other senses, his new owner will need to be patient and be prepared to act as his guide human to help him settle into his new home.
‘He would love a quiet home where there will be minimal changes in the furniture layout and not too many visitors.
‘He’d also be really pleased with a secure garden where he can happily play with you and he’d love it if someone was around for most of the day as he doesn’t like to be left alone for too long.
‘He’s got plenty of years left in him yet and so much love to give. He just needs a patient owner who can prove love really is blind and can give him a forever home.’
Many women and girls can’t afford the menstrual products they need.
In the UK, 49% of girls have missed an entire day of school because of their period.
Some girls reported that they use socks or that they are taping toilet paper to their pants because they can’t afford pads or tampons – and it can mean missing out on important parts of their education or that they are extremely uncomfortable in the classroom.
But following a campaign by Free Periods and the Red Box Project, menstrual products are finally going to be available in all schools in England.
(Picture: Getty Images/Dorling Kindersley)
According to the Guardian, chancellor Philip Hammond will announce funding to end period poverty in schools in the spring statement this week.
The move comes after campaigning by 19-year-old founder of Free Periods Amika George and the Red Box project.
In December 2017, Amika organised the #FreePeriods protest outside Downing Street where over 2,000 people gathered to fight against period poverty.
At the start of this year, Amika and the Red Box Project launched a fundraising campaign to allow them to mount a legal challenge against the government.
After hearing the news, Amika tweeted: ‘WE DID IT!!!!! 271,000 of you signed the petition, 2,000 of you protested. Today, the government has just pledged to end #periodpoverty by pledging FREE MENSTRUAL PRODUCTS in all secondary schools! #FreePeriods.’
The scheme is expected to be similar to one already in place in Scotland since last year. In Wales, the government pledged £1m to address period poverty.
If you’ve ever lived in a houseshare, you probably know the struggle of having flatmates who don’t pull their weight.
You don’t want to cause friction but also, you don’t want to have to deal with the overflowing bin again.
This student came up with the perfect passive agressive way to get her point across.
Ruth, a student at Lancaster University, lives in a house with 10 other people.
The tipping point came when she had taken the bins out for the fourth time in a row.
Hoping to get their attention, make them laugh and get the point that actually she’s not there to tidy up after them, Ruth created a survey.
She sent it to the group Whatsapp saying:
‘Guys can you please please please please pretty PLEEEEASE do this survey for me real quick. It’ll take like 30 seconds and it’s on a subject that’s really close and dear to my heart. Thankeeee.’
When they clicked on the link they found a few not so subtle questions.
The first one said: ‘Do you know where the bins are situated?’
The options to choose from were:
‘Of course, for I am a human being with eyes
‘Lol what is B I N.’
Question two said: ‘Are you aware that bins, when full, require emptying?’
And the options were: ‘I got into a top 10 uni, clearly I have more than three brain cells.’
or ‘Omg wot I just assumed the magical bin pixies do it when I’m asleep haha wot crazy.’
The third question added: ‘So how about emptying those bins once in a while, eh?’
And the answers were: ‘Of course, for I wish to create a happy and tidy living situation for my housemates, and strive towards a society where everyone contributes to make the world a better place.’
Or you could choose: ‘Yes of course my good friend Ruth, because it is all our rubbish after all.’
The final question was: ‘Did I create this survey PURELY because I’m salty about emptying all the bins for the fourth time in a row and wished to communicate this in a passive aggressive yet mildly witty way?’
And the only answers for that one were ‘yes’ or alternatively ‘yes’.
Ruth’s flatmate India posted the survey on Twitter and it seems lots of people thought it was great.
if anyone wanted an insight into living with students, my housemate has just sent this survey to the house chat for us to fill in pic.twitter.com/oMaDJp9bEn
India said: ‘There’s 11 of us in the house, and only a few of us really pull our weight, which is what led Ruth to make the survey because it’s so annoying feeling like the only ones who do any work.
‘The tipping point was that Ruth had taken the bins out about four times in a row, I was in the kitchen with her and she was adamant she wouldn’t take the bins out again but then couldn’t bear to look at the overflowing bins so ended up taking them out.
‘It was raining so she came back in soaked through with soggy slippers and that’s when she made the survey.
‘Everyone in the house thought it was HILARIOUS although it hasn’t made any difference at all because the bin is still overflowing and nobody is rushing to empty it.’
Come on guys. Don’t make Ruth make another survey.
Picture: Finding The One doesn’t have to be a chore
Struggling to find your soul mate?
We hear you. There’s nothing more demoralising than trawling through thousands of online dating profiles, or meeting up with the occasional token hottie to find that, actually, they’re a complete weirdo. And look nothing like their dating profile. Oh, and aren’t single like they said they were. It’s not ideal.
Don’t fret, though. In honour of the Creme Egg hunting season – the challenge that has the nation searching high and low for the elusive white Creme Egg worth £10,000 – we want to help you hunt down The One.
Here are just a few tips that’ll get you back on the love train – destination: romance.
It takes two to tango
Picture: Internet dating isn’t all it’s cracked up to be
What is your idea of the perfect partner? Someone who makes you laugh and enjoys reading? Or maybe a fitness fanatic with a passion for cooking up a storm in the kitchen?
Whatever it is that gives you the butterflies, it’s worth reflecting those desires back on yourself. If your dream person has very particular hobbies and you don’t take part in any of those things yourself, how do you expect to ever meet them?
We’re not suggesting you change who you are, but if your heart is set on finding someone with certain passion points, it might be a good idea to start exploring those avenues yourself.
At the very least, it will just add another string to your bow, but it could be the first step to finding Mr or Mrs Right.
Get a sidekick
Picture: You love your friends and they love you – they’re your ideal matchmaker
Turn on the bat signal, send out a mayday and make that call – you need the help of your friends when it comes to finding love!
Your family have undoubtedly tried and spectacularly failed in your quest to find love, either finding completely inappropriate people or scaring away the few who had an ounce of fighting chance.
Your friends, however, are far better equipped to help you out. They know you down to a T and they’ll know people who you’ll actually like.
Plus, the chances are that they’ll have other friends outside of your group, so your scope for finding The One increases significantly.
Pluck up the courage and ask if they can set you up with someone – it could just be your big break.
Life’s too short
Picture: Don’t miss out on the love of a lifetime just because you don’t want to lose face – leap at any opportunity you get
You may have already met the love of your life…
It could be a childhood friend or a colleague you’ve had the hots for since day one, or even your friend’s sibling; whoever it is, if the only thing that’s been stopping you from asking them out or telling them how you really feel is that they’re ‘your friend’, then you need to change your attitude.
It’s clichéd, but life really is too short, and it’s not worth torturing yourself over what could be when you could just, well, do it.
There’s no guarantee what the outcome will be, but the chances are that if you’re already that close to someone, they’ve probably thought about it too. And, more importantly, you’re not going to know until you ask, are you?
Open your mind
Picture: Don’t restrict yourself – there’s a whole world out there, and who knows who you might meet?
Looking in the right places is one step, but have you ever considered that maybe – just maybe – you are narrowing your options too much?
There are an awful lot of bad eggs out there, we completely agree. But there are also plenty of great ones if you’re willing to relax a little.
Whether someone’s late for your date, eats with their mouth full or has never heard of your very niche favourite band, that’s not something to judge them on straight away. Give them the chance to show you their true colours; you might be more than pleasantly surprised.
Just remember: compromise is a part of love. No one should have to completely change who they are to please someone, but annoying habits can easily be smoothed out or overlooked – especially if that person can offer you happiness and everything else on top
Love isn’t scripted
Picture: What will be will be – and who knows what lovely surprises love might throw your way
The key thing to take from all of this is that there isn’t a strict formula to hunting down The One.
You could find them later today, tomorrow, or in a year from now, and it’s often entirely down to chance that you meet the perfect person for you.
So stop being hard on yourself and don’t worry. And, if you need something to preoccupy your thoughts in the meantime, there’s a very valuable chocolate egg that needs finding…
Most people use internet dating and although you chat online, you never know what to expect when you turn up.
You might meet the love of your life or you might realise there’s just no chemistry there in real life, in which case you probably go home and don’t speak again.
Kimberley Latham-Hawkesford went on a date with a man three months ago but didn’t hear from him after their coffee together.
She didn’t think much of it until last month, when a notification with his name unexpectedly popped up on her screen.
The man got back in touch and at first apologised for the silence since their date. Totally acceptable.
But he then followed his message with a list of 15 things Kimberley needs to improve about herself, and he didn’t hold back.
The post reads: ‘Hello Kimberley, I know we went on a date quit a while ago but I’d like to explain why I haven’t messaged you.
(Picture: Kimberley Latham-Hawkesford)
‘I feel like you could have made the date much better, here’s a few reasons why. I apologize if I offend you.
‘If you lost some weight, you would look incredible. Maybe about a stone or so.
‘You are very pale. I know you aren’t a fan of the sun but a bit of fake tan won’t hurt.
‘You have quite big boobs so you should show your off cleavage [sic] more.
‘I think you need to wear clothes that suit your figure and maybe update your style slightly. Just so I’m not embarrassed to be seen with you.
‘You need to dye your hair a normal colour and add extensions. Longer hair is much more attractive.’
The man goes on to tell her she needs to look natural, while also telling her she needs hair extensions and lip fillers.
‘You need to look more natural, stop wearing makeup. Just make yourself look decent but don’t overkill it,’ he adds.
‘Your lips have gone down so you should think of getting more filler. I know you said you regretted it but filler would make you look sexier.’
(Picture: Kimberley Latham-Hawkesford)
And of course, despite telling her she needs to lose weight and that he was embarrassed to be seen with her, he advises that she needs more confidence.
He said: ‘You need so much more confidence, confidence is sexy!
The post continues: ‘The fact you take things slow makes you look like a prude. I didn’t get a kiss which messed with my ego. Be more sensitive to others feelings.
‘When we had food I know you got a salad but having full fat coke is more calories you really don’t need.
‘You need to keep your past to a minimum. I don’t care about it and what you went through.
‘Get a sense of humour, you didn’t laugh at a single one of my jokes.
‘You just seemed a bit stuck up. Sort your personality our.
‘You made me feel shit when you offered to pay. It’s like you thought I didn’t have enough money after telling you how much is in my account.
‘You didn’t compliment me once.’
But of course, he lets her know that if she sorts all these things out, he’s happy to give her another chance.
‘If you take these on board I might consider another date. I will give you a month and get back in touch to see if this made a difference. Good day to you Kimberley.’
Kimberley though, wasn’t impressed. She said: ‘Imagine being so far up your own ass you’d send this to a girl 3 months after a date.’
We all know that renting in London is pretty bleak – poor conditions, high costs and small spaces.
But one woman claims that her health problems, including exhaustion, memory loss and her hair coming out in clumps, have been caused by living in a mouldy flat.
At first, when Emma Marshall, 29, who works in the music industry, moved in to a property in Hackney, east London, in 2014, and noticed “thick black mould” in the bathroom, she did not think much of it.
But, since moving out the following year, her health has steadily declined, as symptoms such as brain fog, chronic nerve pain and skin rashes have taken over.
At her wits’ end when GPs could not suggest a solution, Emma sought help from a functional medicine specialist – a form of alternative medicine which looks at patients holistically and tries to determine the root cause, rather than treating individual symptoms.
In February 2019 she was shocked to discover that her levels of mycotoxins – which, according to the World Health Organisation (WHO), are naturally occurring toxins produced by mould, and can pose a serious health threat – were sky high.
Convinced it was breathing in toxins while living in the mouldy flat that triggered her nightmare, Emma said: ‘When I met with the functional medicine doctor, we talked about the kind of environment I lived and worked in, and as soon as I said I started to feel unwell in 2014, when I lived in the flat, something clicked.
‘Since then, my body has broken and continued to be slowly poisoned over the years.’
Before 2014, Emma was the picture of health, enjoying a fast-paced life working in the glamorous music industry.
Then, after a year of living in her old flat, she moved out to be closer to her new job – blissfully unaware of the string of health issues that were to come.
She said: ‘I’d had a few symptoms, like acne, exhaustion and aches and pains throughout my body, but I thought it was down to stress and working a lot.
‘People are used to living around mould and not knowing what it’s doing to their body and, at that point, I had never heard of mycotoxins.’
In February 2015, she had a serious kidney infection, which resulted in her needing a catheter – a thin, flexible tube used to empty the bladder – to be fitted for two weeks.
Then, in April, she had a nasty fall in the street and fractured her arm, which led to nerve pain so terrible in her arm, shoulder and neck, she was scarcely able to move.
She then needed her appendix removed, after experiencing severe abdominal pain.
For months, she was passed around various different doctors – but nobody seemed to know why her body was reacting so extremely.
‘Nobody ever questioned why my body broke down so severely in so many different ways. I was simply called unlucky,’ she said.
Since then, her life has been taken over by ailments including flu-like symptoms, nerve, joint and muscular pain, headaches, memory loss, brain fog, insomnia, rashes, acne, thinning hair and facial swelling.
Emma before she became unwell (PA Real Life/Colllect)
‘Because the doctors couldn’t find anything, you think it’s all in your head and so just feel like you have to get on with it,’ she continued.
‘It is a very isolating place to be in, though. Knowing something is wrong and not being heard tests your strength and makes you feel like you’re screaming into an abyss.
‘I would wonder why I couldn’t do certain things, but then also had to just accept how I was as my new normality. At my worst, I could only just about manage getting a taxi to work, then I’d go home and go straight to bed.
‘People would think I was just being dramatic, which would make me isolate myself even more.’
Towards the end of 2018, Emma hit rock bottom, and became so unwell that she was more or less bedbound.
Desperate for answers, she took to the internet and stumbled upon a page about mycotoxin poisoning.
Emma showing where her skin has been affected (Picture: PA Real Life/GoFundMe)
After researching more, she became convinced that is what she had, and paid to see a private functional medicine doctor, who tested her via a urine sample.
Speaking about the results she received last month, which revealed she did indeed have mycotoxin poisoning, Emma said: ‘Functional medicine is amazing when it comes to chronic illness.
‘They can piece everything together like a puzzle, rather than just treating the symptoms.
‘The best service you can do for yourself when it comes to healthcare is to combine functional and western medicine.
‘The results really shocked me. I figured I’d likely have some mycotoxins in my system, but the doctor told me my levels were off the charts.
‘He asked how I felt, and I said, “I know this sounds dramatic, but I feel as if I am dying, and the life is being slowly sucked out of me.”
‘It was traumatic knowing my body was failing and not to know why. Now it’s just as scary to discover I was being slowly poisoned.’
Determined to get well again, Emma is fully detoxing her system, and has set up a GoFundMe page to help with the cost of her ongoing care.
Caption: Emma showing where her hair has come out (PA Real Life/Colllect)
Using an alternative approach, she plans to take binders – which aim to ‘trap’ toxins and help move them out of the body – for around a year, before also having a type of stem cell rejuvenation.
With the funds raised through her GoFundMe page, she is hoping to travel to a specialist clinic called Sanoviv in Mexico for the treatment.
‘Healing is not quick and simple. It’s not a case of taking a pill and fixing something, but of finding the root cause and doing everything in my power to reset it,’ she said
By speaking out, she hopes to raise awareness of mould and mycotoxin poisoning in the hope that, one day, it will be better understood by both medical professionals and members of the public alike
Emma is now fundraising and is also encouraging others to Tweet under the hashtag #ButYouLookFine to help raise awareness of invisible illnesses.
Emma raise funds and awareness, continued: ‘The NHS is an amazing service, despite being underfunded and overworked, and the people who work in it and save lives daily are incredible. But the research into mycotoxins simply isn’t there, let alone the treatment.
‘We’re having to catch up to all these relatively new illnesses that can damage lives, with no quick fix.
‘I would really like to see testing for mycotoxin poisoning as standard protocol, especially if someone is living in a mouldy environment – but I know change must come from the top down, and not within the NHS.
‘Not everybody will have as adverse a reaction as me, but those that do should be dealt with straight away and listened to.
‘Diseases that aren’t widely heard of are scary, and people don’t always know what to say or do. What people don’t understand is that the person going through them will need to rebuild not just their body, but their whole life too – so please show love and support through those scary times.’
