How I Save is a weekly series in which we take a look inside a week of someone’s spending and saving to see what we can learn.*

*Whether from their budgeting tricks or a lesson in what not to do.

We do this because we’re all a little uncomfortable talking about money. That’s a problem when we have no clue what we’re doing, finance-wise, and feel too embarrassed to ask for help.

Last week we tracked the spending and saving of a 28-year-old in Preston earning £30,000.

This time we’re chatting with Amber (not her real name, as people can get nasty about money habits), a 24-year-old content consultant living in St Albans.

How Amber Saves:

I earn £28,000 a year and in my savings account right now I have £50.78.

I save by putting aside any money I have leftover outside my assigned budget.

I’m saving for a rainy day. My partner and I have a joint account with our holiday savings, so my personal savings are for anything I like. Realistically, I’d like to keep saving my half of a deposit for our next house as we’ll probably move in four years due to the interest rates on our Help to Buy loan.

The main way I save is by working from home. My company allows us to work from home up to three days a week, so every month I put aside my estimated monthly commute in a Monzo savings pot.

I buy my tickets daily (£17.25), so when I work from home, I can save money from the budget I’ve already accounted for.

I struggle with saving because some months require more budget for socialising. I think it’s important to spend money on experiences and social events with friends and family, but this can take a hit on my monthly budget. Therefore, I’ll sometimes keep the saved ticket fare to pay for lunch or whatever I have planned.

How Amber spends:

Monthly expenses:

• Bills: £683 (my half of the mortgage, electricity, water, Netflix, Spotify and gym)
• Food shopping for £87
• Monthly commute (depends on the number of working days): £250-350

A week of spending:

Monday: McDonald’s breakfast is £8.68 and lunch to celebrate my partner’s birthday is £19.06.

Tuesday: Lunch from work’s canteen costs £4.75 (jerk chicken and rice!) and milk for work, as we’d run out, is 50p.

Wednesday: £3.50 on shampoo and shower gel to shower at work and then £1.10 on crisps from the work canteen. It’s extortionate, but my card didn’t work at Sainsbury’s.

Thursday: The trains were cancelled on my way home, so we got sausage and chips through Deliveroo for £13.09.

Friday: I work from home on Fridays, so I spent nothing!

Saturday: I had my half sleeve filled in, so I spent £180, however this was taken from my savings account that I had planned for.

Sunday: A hangover from the previous night meant Sunday was spent sitting on the sofa binge-watching Big Mouth, and no spending!

Total spent this week: £230.68

How I Save is a weekly series about how people spend and save, out every Thursday. If you’d like to anonymously share how you spend and save – and get some expert advice on how to sort out your finances – get in touch by emailing ellen.scott@metro.co.uk.

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A mum of two has sparked debate after saying that smoking weed every day makes her a better mum.

23-year-old Caitlin Fladager says marijuana helps with her anxiety and allows her to sleep better at night. She went on to say it should be seen as no different than having a glass of wine.

Caitlin lives in Vancouver, Canada, where recreational and medicinal marijuana use is legal. She opened up about her weed use and struggles with her mental health to her 285k Instagram followers.

‘It’s so funny to me how frowned upon marijuana is,’ she writes.

‘No one looks twice when a mom says she enjoys “mom juice”, aka wine, after her kids are in bed. But when a mom says she smokes weed, it’s a huge shock.

‘I have never been the most patient with my two kids.

‘Weed makes me a better mom, as I get a good night’s sleep after I smoke. I wake up well rested and with a clearer mind.’

Caitlin had her first child with her high school sweetheart Noah when she was 18. The couple have since married and now have two kids, Adriana and Jack.

‘It’s okay to smoke weed after your kids go to bed,’ Caitlin added on her post.

‘It’s okay to smoke it to help with anxiety. Mine has been SO much better since I started smoking.’

She added that she also smokes weed to help regulate her weight: ‘I’ve always been dangerously underweight. Now, I am at the healthiest weight I have ever been in my life.

‘Marijuana is my glass of wine. It’s my can of beer.

‘It’s my relaxation time. You can still be a kick ass mom and smoke weed.’

Sharing the post on both Facebook and Instagram, Caitlin has attracted thousands of likes and comments. Most of Caitlin’s followers supported her admission, but some people were critical.

‘If you smoke weed every day or you drink every day this is a problem!’, commented one.

‘Regardless of whether you have children, if you’re responsible for another person you should not drink or smoke. Especially when you’re home alone with children.’

Another added: ‘My kids drive me insane but never would I smoke weed. Not gonna blame my kids for an excuse to get high.’

But plenty of people were on her side, with some even voicing the opinion that smoking weed is less dangerous than alcohol.

‘Just as acceptable if not more so. Alcohol has many more negative side effects than weed. Love this post,’ said another woman.

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It seems no evening of drinks is complete these days without a novel activity to go alongside it.

We can’t go for a drink after work without simultaneously playing ping-pong or shuffleboard or darts or bingo – because otherwise how will our Instagram stories audience know how much fun we’re having?

A quiet catch-up? No thanks. I could be smashing plates or playing neon urban golf or throwing axes – it’s 2019.

The latest development in late night, drink fuelled, organised fun is the UK’s first dedicated virtual shooting lodge, Smoky Barrels, which is coming to London for the festive period.

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Because nothing is more festive than pretending to slaughter animals while sinking mulled wines and devouring a burger.

‘Cutting-edge Swedish technology transforms the traditional sport of hunting into a never seen before simulation game, transporting you to a shoot in the Scottish Highlands,’ reads the website.

Guests are encouraged to don Barbour-style jackets and flat caps as they pick up their imitation rifles and fire shots at animals on giant video screens.

After you’ve made your kill, you then get to see a close-up showing exactly where you’ve hit the animal.

The targets range from birds to moose to wild boar, and you get to shoot at these virtual beasts set amongst ‘the magic of a Highland Shooting lodge.’

As well as the shooting, guests can also expect open fires for toasting whisky marshmallows, deep wing backed chairs, smoked cocktails, mulled wines and a Whisky Wall.

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But not everyone thinks a virtual shooting experience is the best way to spark that festive feeling this Christmas. Animal rights group PETA had some strong words when we approached them about the new concept.

‘PETA opposes hunting video games because they glorify violence against the defenceless, encourage callousness, and desensitise young people to the suffering of others,’ said a spokesperson.

‘With boundless opportunities for amusement, it’s near psychopathic to get a thrill from gunning down other living beings, even in a virtual world – and, just as sexual predators enjoy on-screen pornography, it may lead to real-life enactments.’

A spokesperson for Smoky Barrels confirmed to Metro.co.uk that the company ‘does not condone violence against animals’, and that they believe passionately in rebalancing sustainability in the world’s ecosystems.

‘As such, we do not support the farming or consumption of unsustainable agriculture – both livestock and arable forms. We believe in returning to a system where meat (and vegetation) is sourced from as close to natural ecosystems as possible,’ they add.

‘Smoky Barrels is a lighthearted social entertainment concept intended to re-connect guests with the traditional process of hunting.

‘Hunting takes on many forms, but primarily land management and a way-of-life that offers a far more sustainable solution to meat production and consumption than modern agricultural practices.’

The ‘World’s first virtual hunting and bar concept’ has been brought to London by the creators of Mac & Wild – a meat-heavy Scottish restaurant, and guests will also have the chance to dine in a series of hunting lodges.

You can book an entire lodge for a maximum group size of 15 people – which will cost you £90 per hour. Walk-ins for ‘social hunting’ cost £15 and include a drink on arrival.

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It’s Debt Month at Metro.co.uk and each day of November, we’ve been bringing you everything you need to know to keep your finances in check.

Lots of our advice has been about paying back debt and some might say that the best thing would be not to get into it in the first place, but realistically, sometimes you do have to borrow money.

If you have to take out a loan or a credit card, there are some things you can do to stop it from becoming unmanageable and to ensure that you can pay it off as quickly as possible.

Plan your borrowing

Don’t ever borrow money on the spur of the moment. If you are in a situation where you really need money that you simply don’t have at that point in time, think about the best way to handle it.

If you are buying something like a car or furniture on a payment plan, don’t be persuaded to just take the deal. Would buying second hand be a better option for you?

Similarly, you might be tempted to use a buy now, pay later option on a whim when you are shopping online – but can you actually afford to pay it back later?

If you use an overdraft to borrow some money, it is best to speak to your bank as arranged overdraft fees are usually much cheaper.

Think about whether you actually really need to borrow money and if you do, think about it carefully before you commit to anything.

Work out if you can really afford it

If you are borrowing money, you need to factor the repayments into your budget. Look at how much you can afford to pay back and how long it will take. Is that realistic? If not, you might need to rethink.

A long term loan might seem appealing because the monthly repayments are low but you end up paying much more overall.

Use a loan calculator, like this one from MoneySavingExpert, to work out what is really realistic for your circumstances.

The Citizens Advice Bureau (CAB) recommends paying at least 10% of your balance every month on credit cards. They add: ‘If you only pay the minimum amount, you’ll be paying forever.’

At the same time, don’t fool yourself into thinking you can pay back much more every month. Aiming too high could mean you start to fall behind.

Some credit cards are available with interest-free deals, but these only last a certain amount of time.

If you don’t manage to do it within that period, the interest is higher and it starts to build up. Make sure you plan how you will do it within this timeframe if you choose one of these cards. If you don’t think you can, choose an card with a lower interest rate over a longer time period.

Shop around

If you need to borrow money, you should research what is on offer and get advice.

There are lots of types of borrowing and you should understand each one before you make a decision about what you need.

If you are applying for a credit card, there are lots of options available from many different banks and providers.

Making lots of applications can seriously impact your credit rating so you can use the MoneySavingExpert eligibility checker before you apply to see what you are likely to get.

Each one will have different offers and some come with certain perks so read through each one to find what suits for your circumstances.

The CAB says: ‘You may think it will take too much time if you need a loan quickly but you’ll be paying the price for years to come if you don’t.’

Make sure you understand what you are doing

There are different types of loans – secured and unsecured. Secured loans are attached to an asset like your house or a car, so if you miss those payments, you risk losing those assets.

Unsecured loans, like a credit card, meaning you make payments and missing these could mean further fees or court proceedings.

As part of your research, read the terms and conditions and make sure you fully understand what will happen if something goes wrong and you can’t make the payments.

Struggling to get credit? Avoid payday loans and loan sharks

If your credit rating is low but you need to borrow money, you might find that most options are not available to you.

Think about if borrowing the money could wait and if you could instead spend some time improving your credit score, before borrowing money in a way that you can pay back.

Avoid things like payday loans and loan sharks with high-interest rates.

Talk to the CAB about where you can get help with free advice. There might be a Credit Union in your area and you may be able to borrow from the Social Fund.

Children In Need 2019 takes place tomorrow, Friday 15 November 2019, and will see a whole host of celebs join forces to try and beat last year’s epic fundraising total for charity.

Hosts Tess Daly and Marvin and Rochelle Humes have all been pictured ahead of the show modelling this year’s Children In Need T-shirts alongside other stars, including Rylan Clark-Neal who took part in a 24-hour karaoke challenge to raise money for charity earlier this week.

But where can you get this year’s Children In Need T-shirts before the show tomorrow night?

Where can you get this year’s Children In Need T-shirts?

George at Asda is selling the official BBC Children in Need T-shirt this year.

Designed by Graduate Fashion Foundation winner, Megan Grinham, the T-shirts come in either yellow or grey and feature an outline of Pudsey the bear filled with positive words such as ‘ambition, ‘thrive’ and ‘kindness’.

Adult T-shirts are £8 and kids T-shirts start from £6, but you better be quick as most sizes have already sold out in both styles.

Asda are also selling a variety of other Children In Need merchandise including Pudsey onesies, hoodies and pyjamas.

The full range can be viewed on their website and Next Day Delivery is still available if you order online and want to receive your Children In Need items by Friday 15 November.

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If you haven’t booked a venue for your work Christmas party, you might struggle to get a venue at this stage.

But the good news is, your local Morrisons is an option.

Yes, the supermarket is opening up their cafes for office dos – and the good news is, it costs just £6.50 per head.

It is best for smaller offices as the maximum table size is 20 but you’ll get a three course meal including turkey and all the trimmings.

The store said they set it up because cutbacks mean some small business are struggling and a few parties funded by the company have even been cancelled and staff are having to fund them themselves.

This gives them the option of celebrating together on a budget.

Tables for up to 20 can be booked now for Monday 25 November to Monday 23 December.

The Morrisons Christmas Meal Deal start from £6.50 a head for a 2-course meal or £7.50 a head for the full 3-courses. Vegetarian and vegan options are also available.

Helen Tordoff, Head of Cafes at Morrisons commented: ‘Some small businesses have had a tough year so we have created the best Christmas meal for those on a budget. And as our cafés regularly host group meet ups, we thought we’d extend the invite to local companies so they can save some Christmas costs.

‘It will mean that more people can get into the party spirit without breaking the bank.’

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The world’s first Blood Bank for gay and bisexual men to donate blood is to be launched by FreedomToDonate and UNILAD later this month.

The Illegal Blood Bank will open in protest against the current law, which imposes a blanket ban on men who have sex with men from donating blood unless they abstain from sex for three months.

The organisations are campaigning for the government to revise what they see as outdated legislation and reduce discrimination in the blood donation system.

On Saturday 23 November, the Illegal Blood Bank will launch in a secret London location and aims to highlight how alternative methods for assessing donor eligibility can help to identify new, safe, eligible donors to meet the NHS demand.

With a 25% drop in men donating blood over the past five years and a 6% drop in women, the NHS requires 135,000 new donors each year to replace those who stop donating.

59,000 people have already signed FreedomToDonate’s petition to show their support for this change in law.

Campaigners say this is especially important around Christmas when it can be difficult for the NHS to maintain blood stock, as donations usually dip from mid-December to early January.

The NHS says that the three-month abstinence time-frame exists because, while all donations are screened, there is a small chance the tests they carry out to detect blood-borne viruses will not be able to pick up recently acquired infections.

But the campaigners argue that the blanket three-month deferral period for gay and bisexual does not take account of individual factors which impact risk levels for all donors.

‘For example, potential donors who … regularly test for STIs and blood-borne viruses could be eligible to donate based on their individual behaviour rather than categorising them as a homogenous group,’ reads the campaign statement.

‘Assessing individual factors in a risk-based approach whilst ensuring the safety of any blood that is donated could help ensure all people who can safely donate blood are able to.’

‘Our position is simple – anyone who can safely donate blood should be able to,’ says Ethan Spibey, founder of FreedomToDonate.

‘Through our collaboration with UNILAD, we’re aiming to raise awareness of the unfairness in blood donation on a huge scale and demonstrate the incredible potential of those thousands of gay and bi men who could potentially donate through an alternative model.’

Professional rugby player Keegan Hirst has also lent his support to the campaign and has pledged to donate when the blood bank opens.

‘There are still very few professional sportsmen and women who are openly gay,’ says Keegan.

‘People should be empowered to celebrate who they are but this won’t happen if there are policies in place, which discriminate against certain communities.

‘I’ll be donating blood at the Illegal Blood Bank in the hope it leads to gay and bisexual men who are safe to donate, being able to do so.’

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Gone are the days where an orange in a stocking will suffice – nowadays kids want games, consoles, AirPods, and other tech for Christmas.

The price can really add up, so it’s no wonder plenty of parents are finding new ways to make the most of their money at this time of year.

For Emma Farrell, 42, that’s consisted of a Nectar and coupon hack that saw her getting over £130 worth of Nintendo Switch games with change from £30.

The mum, from Wrexham, North Wales, is a member of the Nectar points scheme, and tends not to spend them throughout the year.

She spotted a deal on the loyalty scheme’s website where £50 in Nectar points could be doubled up to £100 to be spent at Sainbury’s.

Emma also had a coupon that gave her £7.50 off of each £50 spent in store.

She got three Nintendo Switch games for her seven-year-old son, Oliver; Luigi’s Mansion 3, Mario and Sonic at the Olympic Games Tokyo 2020 and New Super Mario Bros U Deluxe.

What would have been a spend of 132.97 ended up as just £25.47 thanks to Emma’s trick.

The limited-time Nectar deal is available from today to 19 November to all customers who have over 1,000 points. You can double up a minimum of £5 worth of points up to a maximum of £50, and do so on the Nectar app.

‘I made the most of the offer by using the coupon,’ Emma says.

‘I had it through the post and was saving it for the offer hoping it would stack and it did. I went first thing this morning straight after the school run to make sure I got the games I wanted as they were on Oliver’s Christmas list.’

‘He will be so excited as I kept saying to him that’s a lot on games and I don’t know if Father Christmas will pay that much and I know that without this offer there is no way I would be spending £133 on three games,’ she added.

‘I was super excited that they were all in stock and before I doubled up the points on the app, I went to customer services and asked them to check if all three games were in stock first and couldn’t believe it when they were as my Sainsbury’s only has a relatively small games section.’

Emma then posted her find on bargain community LatestDeals.co.uk, where it’s been an instant hit with fellow savvy shoppers.

Commenters raved about the deal, with one saying ‘This is brilliant, well worth using this’ and another saying, ‘I’ve just turned 15 pounds into 30 and am going to spend mine on Taste the Difference wine for Xmas… Excellent deal and well worth saving those points up’.

One also had the good sense to advise us all that the deal can also be used on groceries (including wine). So, if you want to stock up for Christmas, now is the time.

As for bargain hunters wishing to use Emma’s handy trick, she says, ‘Find out the games or products you want and make a list with alternatives just in case your chosen ones aren’t in stock. Ask at customer services before doubling up to check as the games are empty cases and they may not have them in the stock room.

‘If there is no stock, ask when they will have more in or if another local store has stock and if they can check. Check your Nectar app for bonus spends and offers all year round to collect the points and keep them for the double up. eBay is also a fab way to collect extra points too.’

OK, so you want to move in with your mate. You’ve named the communal houseplant and are dreaming of the meatballs you’ll gobble down on the trip to Ikea. You love your friend and can’t think of anything better than spending all your time in their company.

You can’t even imagine how things could go awry.

It’s a lovely idea and it might be completely delightful. It could also become the ideal living arrangement, if you do it right.

Here’s the potential problem: a lot of people have secret at-home habits that you’re usually not privy to when you’re just meeting up with someone socially. People can be messy, smelly, neurotic, chaotic and annoying in all sorts of ways you might not be able to predict.

That, and of course living in close proximity to someone – anyone – can be challenging for plenty of reasons.

You’ve got to manage rent, bills, groceries, tidiness, dishwasher-stacking technique, chore distribution, emotional labour, personal space and general household behaviour compatibility.

If you move in with a stranger and it’s a total disaster, fine. Sort out your legal obligations, put up with it as long as you can, give up on a blossoming friendship and get out of there.

However, if you move in with a pre-existing friend of yours, there’s a lot more at stake. If you have a spat, discover you’re domestically incompatible and run out of patience with each other, you risk losing your entire friendship.

To give your friendship the best possible chance of surviving co-habitation, you’ve got to be smart about this.

Before you even suggest sharing a home, have a proper think about your compatibility. It’s worth being pragmatic, especially if you have drastically different budgets, definitions of cleanliness, social lives and general approaches to domestic life.

If you do decide to move in together, here are some things you can do to minimise the conflict and protect the friendship.

Get the awkward money chat out of the way before the move

Most of us find talking about money awkward and scary.

But if you’re planning on running a household together, you have to do it.

There will inevitably be shared expenses and it’s worth chatting about them upfront so you can manage everyone’s expectations.

If you’re going in on a lease together, have an honest chat about what you can afford. Don’t stretch yourself financially thin to keep up with someone else’s earnings, and don’t assume someone can afford the same amount of rent each month as you can.

You might not even know each other’s salaries as friends, so work something out that makes you both comfortable.

Then, decide whether you want to split any household maintenance costs.

Will you split the cost of cleaning products? Do you want to go in on a weekly grocery shop?

Who is going to set up a direct debit for council tax? Will you share the TV licence? Whose Netflix password do you need to memorise?

It’s great to hash all of this out from the start so you’re clear on who owes what.

Don’t be the slob flatmate

Your room is your space – you are entitled to live in as much filth as you like.

Communal spaces, however, should be kept clean and tidy. It’s a gesture of respect to keep the space that you share with someone else nice.

You’ll become unpopular very quickly if you’re always leaving dirty dishes on the kitchen counter and clothes on the living room floor.

Tidy up after yourself diligently and you’ll give your new flatmate no reason to secretly resent you.

It might be useful to put together a rota for cleaning the common areas, split chores evenly or pick a day each week or month to give the place a good going over.

You don’t want to be the one shocking your friend with your unexpected slovenliness.

Don’t forget to spend time together

When you’re living together, it’s easy to get quite complacent about actually spending proper time together.

You see each other in the hall, you watch telly together sometimes in the evening and you have a quick chat over breakfast, so you feel like you’ve seen each other.

But real, lasting friendship requires a little more investment than that. If you want to keep yours, make time and space in your life so your friend knows they’re important to you.

I recommend scheduling in friendship dates where you leave the house. You could go for a walk together, have dinner at the local pub or pop by the farmer’s market.

Whatever it is, just make sure it feels a little more special than brief, incidental interactions at home.

If there’s a problem, be open and honest about it

Try and have a policy of candour, kindness and transparency in your new household.

Be gentle and compassionate with each other. Listen properly. Check in on the other person and ask how they’re doing. Have proper, regular chats.

Be honest with each other, especially if something is quietly becoming a problem at home – it’s better to talk it out than leave an annoyance to simply fester over time.

If something your friend does bothers you, find a diplomatic way of raising it instead of just keeping your new resentment to yourself.

Be considerate, too, and notice how your friend likes to live.

Don’t play loud music if you live with someone who likes peace and quiet.

Don’t have loud sex if you live in a place with thin walls, or invite people over without warning.

Don’t eat your friend’s yoghurt without asking.

Be your loveliest self and you could just have the time of your life, living with a friend.

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This house is property goals.

The three-bedroom place has just won Grand Designs: House of the Year 2019.

The house is located in Saintfield, Co. Down, Northern Ireland on the site of a former farmstead.

House Lessans cost just £335,000 to build in the beautiful countryside setting.

The house, designed by architects Mcgonigle McGrath in Belfast, was crowned the winner after beating off the six other shortlisted properties.

The award is given by the Royal Institute of British Architect to a new-build designed by architects.

RIBA President, Alan Jones, said: ‘House Lessans demonstrates that life-enhancing architecture does not have to cost the earth.

‘Executed with incredible clarity and restraint, McGonigle McGrath has used simple and cheap materials to create a truly bespoke home that resonates with its owners and its context.

‘Even with the tightest of budgets, House Lessans shows that a dream home, designed by a talented architect, can be a reality.’

It’s built out of two blocks to create an L-shape with a double-height living room and bedrooms that look over a tranquil courtyard garden.

The kitchen and snug make the most of the beautiful views with a huge wall of glass.

To keep costs low, they used basic building materials, including cheap concrete bricks carefully laid and painted inside with flush mortar joins to ensure a perfect finish, and arranged the rooms to get as much space as possible.

Architect Kieran McGonigle (McGonigle McGrath) said: ‘It has been both a delight and a challenge to work on this project; a delight in the beautiful location in this archetypically Ulster landscape and in the simple brief, and a challenge in designing and delivering a precisely detailed and high-quality building within a modest budget.

‘The outcome, a small collection of forms in the landscape, contributes to this place and, we hope, extends our understanding of how to make buildings in our countryside.’

Sylvia and Michael, the owners of House Lessans said: ‘Like most non-architects about to build a home we had a clear idea about what we’d like in terms of rooms but no idea about how these rooms might be arranged or what the house might look like.

‘The magic a gifted architect can work was evident from the moment we saw the initial plans and that appreciation deepened as the project progressed.

‘We feel that the house respects and indeed enhances the landscape. It is a joy to live in – from seeing the soaring bedroom ceiling on wakening, being surrounded by the gentle landscape in the kitchen during the day, to enjoying the sunset in the top room.

‘We’re delighted to be a part of the RIBA celebration of the life-enhancing potential of architecture.’

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Kayleb Alexander, 23, met 56-year-old Mark Nichols six years ago.

Mark, who was then 49, sent Kayleb – who was 17 at the time – a message on the gay dating and hookup app Grindr, and their relationship went from there.

Mark said that he didn’t initially think that he was going to fall in love, but their connection felt clear, and they made things official just a few months in.

While the couple, who live in Ypsilanti, Michigan, have a relatively normal life, their six-year partnership has been subject to intense criticism due to their age gap.

They want to dispel the rumours that there is any sort of control or manipulation involved between them, and to tell ‘haters’ that Mark is not a sugar daddy.

Some of the comments they’ve received include that Mark is a paedophile, they are ‘disgusting’, and that their age gap makes people want to vomit.

Kayleb said: ‘It triggers me because there are actual occurrences. My boyfriend is in a consensual relationship with a 23-year-old male.’

He feels that you shouldn’t be judged if you’re in an age-gap relationship when there is consent and both are of legal age. In Michigan, the age of consent is 16.

In Mark’s opinion, there’s a double standard, where heterosexual relationships are treated differently. He feels that, if an older man was to be with a younger woman, they’d be lauded, whereas he is called ‘sick and twisted’ for being with a younger man.

But it isn’t just anonymous commenters that have concerns about their age gap.

Kayleb’s best friend voiced her concerns about Mark’s health in the future, and the fact that their ages might have meant they had differing interests and not a lot in common.

When she met Mark, however, and saw him with Kayleb, she said that those fears melted away.

Mark and Kayleb regularly appear together in videos on Kayleb’s YouTube channel, where they talk about the trials and tribulations of being together for six years.

Although Kayleb sometimes labels videos with titles that include words like ‘sugar daddy’, the pair stress that is simply clickbait and sensationalism, and Kayleb is perfectly capable of looking after himself (although, Mark adds, ‘when he wants to’).

They’ve definitely been through some hardships, including when Mark cheated on Kayleb.

Although they don’t specify how far this infidelity went, a video Kayleb uploaded to his channel seemed to hint that Mark had been meeting up with someone else.

Kayleb says, though, that he’s ‘overcome’ the cheating, and they’re stronger as a result.

The couple are now planning to move away to Hawaii, where they purchased their dream home recently.

Although Mark worries that he’ll pass away before Kayleb reaches his 50s himself, Kayleb said that he’d be happy to take care of his boyfriend as he becomes less able to do so himself, and they’re taking it all in their stride.

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Every day, we throw away huge amounts of food.

Supermarkets get rid of food that’s about to go off, while restaurants and cafe don’t want to keep things that aren’t fresh.

Too Good to Go is an app that is trying to stop that – and Morrisons has just joined up so now you can get groceries.

The idea is that stores sign up to sell magic boxes for a reduced price. At the end of the day, they fill them with things that would otherwise be thrown away.

You pay through the app and get given a slot before closing time to go and pick it up.

The app has been around for a while with people using it to pick up leftover cakes, treats or whole restaurant meals at a reduced price.

But Morrisons is the first supermarket to trial it and the box costs just £3.09.

It’s only available in about 80 stores at the minute but hopefully, it will expand in the future.

There are only a few boxes available every day so you need to be quick.

The food is all close to expiry but you can freeze it, or cook something up and keep it for a few days more.

Fran Mae posted about her box on the Extreme Couponing and Bargains Facebook group.

She said: ‘Got my first magic bag this evening from Too Good To Go app. I’m so impressed. I thought I’d share. I know it has been before but I was always a little unsure what one might contain and if it was worth the trip to get it.

‘Mine is from Morrisons cost me £3.59 and when I arrived it was already bagged to go the 2 Salmon fillets best before date was today but everything else is at least the 11th or later.

Her box contained: two salmon fillets, four limes, a pint of milk, a loaf of bread, seven bread rolls (varying types), a pecan plait, four chocolate éclairs, a bag of mixed veg, a salad share box, a ball of mozzarella and a pot of pasta sauce

At normal price, the contents would have cost around £15 so it was quite a saving.

Susan Dransfield has got the magic box twice. Her first box had a box filled with carrots, apples, bananas, a melon, blueberries, a cauliflower, turnip, coffee, muffins, strawberries, cakes and some monster munch.

Her second contained more carrots, parsnips and turnips, pork pies, honey roast ham, potato and egg salad, strawberries, grapes, eggs, a Quorn pasty, Sharon fruit and some salad.

You can download the app from the app store and set up an account and then search to see if the Morrisons near you is involved in the deal.

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If you have a new baby, you’ll know that milk drunk face.

When you’re that tiny, nothing makes you feel more overwhelmed than a helping of your favourite food.

And one man has posted the perfect video copying his baby daughter’s face each time.

Josh Hawkins and his wife Catherine welcomed Billie on 26 September.

The Australian comedian, who posts on Instagram as @HiJosh, posted the compilation of clips of his seven-week-old baby.

He said: ‘Copying my daughter’s milk drunk faces is my new full-time job.’

Each one shows her happiness after a feed and he imitates each one perfectly, even wearing her pink head bow in one.

He rolls his eyes and crookedly smiles just like his little girl.

Our favourite is the adorable moment she sucks on her finger, and of course, dad Josh does it too.

https://www.instagram.com/p/B4wgtDfHGl2/

The video has already had over 77,000 views.

One fan said: ‘OMG I love this!!!!! Always make me laugh. You are so clever!’

Another said: ‘Man she is going to have the best 18th birthday video content.’

‘Omg this is hilarious. Looks exactly the same. But she is cuter !!’ someone else added.

It’s not the first time Billie has gone viral. A video of her enjoying a head massage also received a lot of love online, with over 122,000 views on Instagram.

Only seven weeks old and already a bigger star than most of us will ever be.

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Queen Elizabeth II’s dresser has shared a cleaning tip in her new book that you don’t need to be royal to replicate.

Angela Kelly has worked as a dresser from the Royal Family since 1994, and recently released a book called The Other Side of the Coin: The Queen, the Dresser and the Wardrobe.

In this, she details how she’d get the Queen’s clothes ready for engagements – including royal weddings, Christenings, and Christmas Day speeches.

The queen often wears a lot of sparkling jewellery, whether that’s in the form of crowns for bigger events or brooches and necklaces day-to-day.

According to Angela, the best way to keep this sparkling items is a spot of gin.

‘A little gin and water come in handy to give the diamonds extra sparkle,’ she writes, adding, ‘Just don’t tell the jeweller!’

This technique has actually been used for centuries, with olden-day tales recounting how silverware and jewellery would be soaked in gin overnight.

It would then be rinsed to reveal the shine and remove any tarnishing.

Now, most of us aren’t quite rolling in diamonds like HRH, but do have a bottle or two of in the cupboard.

It might seem like an outlandish claim to assume you have ‘leftover’ gin, but it shouldn’t take much to get your valuables looking spick and span.

Simply put a drop of it on a cotton pad and give it a rub over jewellery or other silverware. The high alcohol content should dissolve any grime and bacteria that’s picked up over time.

For pieces that need a little more elbow grease, you can put aluminium foil in a pot with the shiny side up. Then, soak the silver for around 20 minutes in gin and water, and rinse with dish soap afterwards.

This tip also works with vodka.

You do need to ensure that if you use alcohol to clean silver that it’s not plating and is solid silver. Also, if you have anything hugely valuable, it’s usually better to take it for a professional clean,

Still, if you need your sparklers ready in a flash, this could be the boozy cleaning tip that does it.

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The largest Starbucks in the world is opening tomorrow.

As it’s in Chicago, U.S., here’s a sneak peak so you don’t have to travel across the world.

The first coffee will be served from 9 am at the Michigan Avenue store on Friday 14 November.

It has four storeys and the whole thing is an incredible 35,000 square feet.

Each floor has a different immersive experience, from the first, where you can see the beans being roasted, to the top floor, where you can try some coffee cocktails.

There’s also designs by local artists on each floor to represent the city.

Over the past five years, the brand has created the experience stores in flagship cities across the world.

The Chicago Roastery joins locations in Seattle, Shanghai, Milan, New York and Tokyo but this one is the biggest to date.

Kevin Johnson, Starbucks CEO, said: ‘We have created the ultimate immersive experience around all-things-coffee in spectacular Starbucks Reserve Roasteries in flagship cities around the world.

‘This week we are delighted to open our doors on the sixth global Roastery in an iconic building located on Chicago’s renowned Magnificent Mile.

‘These Roasteries amplify the Starbucks brand, serve as innovation hubs, and create experiences for millions of customers around the world.’

Starbucks opened its first store in Chicago in 1987 – the first store outside of the Pacific Northwest.

The new Roastery will employ 200 people, including roasters, baristas, bakers and mixologist.

Let’s take a look around:

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If you fancy a true luxury holiday, consider this real-life palace on Airbnb.

The suite in a 300-year-old property is available to book, and it even comes with a private butler.

Located in Jaipur in India, the palace is home to the region’s royal family but they are renting out a suite in one of the private sections.

It includes a lounge, kitchen, bathroom and private indoor swimming pool.

Apparently guests including Princess Diana and Oprah Winfrey have stayed there.

It does cost around £8,000 per night so it’s not exactly a budget option but it does look incredible if you have the cash.

All the proceeds from each booking go to the Princess Diya Kumari Foundation, a local nonprofit dedicated to supporting rural women and people of Rajasthan.

The stay includes a chauffeur-driven car from the airport and the private butler who can provide sightseeing recommendations, make travel arrangements and organise restaurant bookings for you.

You’ll also get a member of royal staff to escort you on a private shopping tour around the city.

Every day you will get breakfast and dinner at the in-house restaurant Baradari.

The description on the website says: ‘You can expect tailored menus featuring hearty Rajasthani dishes like laal maas, top shelf wine and champagne, as well as an interaction with the chef during these meals.’

There’s also a complimentary guided tour of the complex by a member of royal staff so you can learn all about the architecture, art and decor.

The Airbnb listing says: ‘A stay at the City Palace will provide an inspiring journey into the rich history, cultural heritage and artistic traditions of Jaipur’s royal family.

‘Guests will be feted by a private butler who will arrange curated city experiences including shopping tours, guided walks through local museums and other excursions.

‘Authentic Rajasthani meals may be enjoyed at the terrace overlooking the Aravalis, and peaceful daily breakfasts can be had in the company of peacocks who are often a sight at the Palace’s lush gardens.’

It sounds dreamy.

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Starbucks’ black Phantom Frappuccino is now long gone, much like the Halloween pumpkins that previously lined the streets.

It’s certainly not all bad, as the chain released their Christmas menu recently, complete with the iconic red cups.

This year’s iced drinks include a bunch of festive Frappuccinos, including gingerbread coffee, gingerbread cream, Toffee Nut latte and Salted Caramel Brownie.

However, this one might actually blow their official options right out of the water.

It’s being dubbed the Buddy the Elf Frappuccino, and was dreamed up by the team at TotallyTheBomb.com.

The treat is one of the ‘secret menu’ items at Starbucks, meaning you won’t be able to see it on the board. But, with a few special requests, you can have your very own Christmas confection.

Instead of asking for this, you’ll need to follow the recipe below. Otherwise, you could end up looking like quite a cotton-headed ninny-muggins.

The colours are certainly Buddy-esque, with a green hue to the drink itself, and festive red sprinkles on the cream on top.

As for the taste, that’s also full on Elf, with candy cane and plenty of sugar. Here’s how to order it:

• Ask for a Matcha Frappuccino, but with peppermint syrup instead of the standard one.
• Say a big huge YES when they ask if you’d like whipped cream.
• Ask if they can sprinkle the top with white Christmas sprinkles. These usually go on top of a Toasted White Mocha.

That’s it.

From there, you can simply marvel at the fact you’ve got something no-one else has. That is until it catches on, and every Instagram from now until 25 December is Buddy-fied.

In other Starbucks news, the biggest in the world has just been opened in Chicago. Have a peek inside.

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Coming from a working-class background, almost everyone I knew throughout my childhood just about managed financially, and most borrowed money. When I was 10, a family member bought me a Sony Discman, which he later secretly pawned so he could survive until payday.

At 18, in a development that shocked my peers, I got into University of Oxford.

My family imagined it would be my ticket to a well-paid job. Perhaps I’d even marry a doctor. At Oxford I mingled with the upper middle classes – people who seemed to have privilege bred into their DNA and money did not seem to matter.

Paralysed by imposter syndrome and determined never to be that person who couldn’t afford to go for sushi, I compensated by maxing out my credit cards.

Did my friends mean to expose my roots by sniggering when they discovered I’d never sampled pesto? Probably not, but such incidents sent my paranoia into overdrive and I compensated by spending as much money as them. By the time I graduated, I owed more than £3,000 on top of my student loan.

My predicament never felt like a problem. If I could make the minimum repayments, I thought, everything would be fine. Another glass of Chardonnay was all it took to convince myself this was true and if my childhood had taught me anything it was that everyone needs a loan once in a while.

I had no idea making minimum repayments at a 25 per cent interest rate would be a recipe for decades of debt. Was I young and dumb? Probably. Did I bother to read the fine print? Definitely not.

After graduating I moved to London and fell into (wait for it) financial journalism.

The financial ‘guru’ in me knew I was heading for a credit crash to rival a small-scale Lehman Brothers.

By day, I penned guides on debt-related topics. Need the best credit to avoid interest? Want to clear up your credit score? I was your woman. I befriended moneyed bankers and went to cripplingly expensive restaurants on the basis it was ‘good for my career.’

At night I socialised with richer friends, spending money on booze I couldn’t afford. I’d think nothing of splurging £500 on a credit card in one night.

From the outside it seemed like I had the ins-and-outs of personal finance down to a tee. A friend deemed me ‘the Primark Martin Lewis’. But after covering these topics for eight hours a day, I lacked the energy to apply the lessons to my own finances.

Half my salary went on renting rooms in mouse-infested house shares, the other half went on debt repayments. The financial ‘guru’ in me knew I was heading for a credit crash to rival a small-scale Lehman Brothers.

Still feeling like an impostor I overcompensated, insisting that the most expensive round was on me at post-work drinks and pushed my money worries to the back of my mind.

A few years after moving to London, I had my student loan as well as £7,000 of debt and felt screwed by my stupidity. My finances were about to completely unravel.

I started working on the launch of a UK price comparison site and, perhaps in a metaphor for the financial crash in my future, it failed.

After being made redundant even my minimum credit card repayments were unsustainable. I took out a payday loan despite advising readers never to make such a move – the most vulnerable find themselves locked into years of debt at crippling interest rates.

It cost me around £1,200 to borrow £600 and shame crept in.

I turned to friends for loans, which took me years to repay. Some are still waiting (they know who they are).

London life became unsustainable so I returned to Hull to live rent-free live with family. Ironically, it was after heading back to one of the UK’s poorest regions that I started to get my debt in order.

I did what I’d been lecturing others about for years: drew up a budget, logged onto my online banking account every day and ruthlessly slashed unnecessary expenses.

I adopted the little-by-little approach known as ‘snowballing’, which involves targeting your most expensive debt first – tackling the loan with the highest interest and then approaching the rest.

This didn’t happen overnight, though. The process took years and is only just meeting completion.

You could say I’m woefully unqualified to give advice about debt and you’d have a point. But knowing the fear of bailiffs knocking on the door and that you’ll never buy a home provides an insight into those paralysed by debt.

One of the things I wish people knew about the money management advice they read is that the authors are human. We f**k up too.

I may have gone to Oxford but I’ll never have the privilege to stop worrying about my finances. We need to be honest about the part privilege plays in our relationship with money and recognise we are where we are because of where we came from.

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It might feel odd to go on a shopping spree and leave the store empty-handed – but in this case it’s for a very good reason.

First launched in 2017, Choose Love is the world’s only store that sells products and services for refugees across the world, and it’s coming back to London this Black Friday.

The charity shop concept turned retail phenomenon will also be opening stores in New York, LA and online.

The stores have so far welcomed 45,000 customers and distributed 1.6 million items for those in need with their unique concept.

When you visit the store, you get to interact with the items and discover why they’re needed by refugees.

Split into three sections, each area explores a different stage of a refugee’s journey, from Arrival (emergency blankets, warm clothing and food) to Shelter (tents, sleeping bags and hygiene packs) all the way to Hope (education supplies, LGBTQ support and mental health care).

The proceeds are then distributed by Help Refugees to their partners across Europe, North America and the Middle East.

You can buy individual products and services and ‘bundles’ of items, which are offered to help people with specific needs.

The Bundle of Warmth features hot food, a child’s coat, firewood and a warm blanket.

The Bundle of Love includes a baby grow, child’s boots, nappies, a wash bag, a tent, and a tarp and pallet.

The Bundle of Hope features mental health support, adult learning and women’s support. So you can choose exactly how you want to help.

As well as spending your money to help people in need, the stores are also designed to teach people about the refugee crisis.

In London, Choose Love will take over two floors at 47-49 Neal Street in Seven Dials, with a DJ booth, stage, seating area and space for the Choose Love merchandise.

All images, stories and items in the store come straight from the front-line of the refugee crisis, where the charity works.

The items on sale will include emergency blankets, children’s shoes, warm gloves, mobile phone credit and more. Costs range from £3 to £500 – so even if you have a small budget, you can still do your bit.

Since Choose Love first opened in 2017 its stores and website equivalent have raised £3 million, helping provide refugees with:

• 158,712 hot meals
• 19,000 blankets and 6,000 tents
• 8,000 insulated baby grows and 21,000 warm children’s coats
• 1,306,777 nappies
• 4,500 school bags
• 5,700 sleeping bags
• Enabled a rescue boat to spend 6 months saving lives at sea.

‘Across Europe, the Middle East and on the US border Help Refugees is supporting hundreds of thousands of refugees living in camps, temporary housing and tents,’ says Josie Naughton CEO of Help Refugees.

‘Dropping temperatures are making already hard lives nearly impossible.

‘By shopping in the Choose Love stores in London, New York, LA or online, ordinary people are helping provide support where governments are failing.

‘Every purchase goes towards life-changing support for some of the world’s most vulnerable people. This holiday season we hope millions of people add a refugee to their gift list.’

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Incredible images released as part of a photography competition are proving that the eyes really are the windows to the soul.

The eye-catching entries include stunning wildlife shots and powerful portraits, and they have all made the final shortlist in Agora’s #Eyes2019 photo contest.

Photo app Agora asked photographers to submit photos that tell the stories of their subjects through their eyes – animals, insects, or humans.

There were more than 23,660 submissions, and the photos featured below have all made the top 50 – which is an incredible achievement.

The community can now vote for their favourite photo in the app until 10 December.

Every vote will help the guest judge, portrait photographer Fawad Malik, to decide who will be declared the overall winner and claim a prize of $1,000.

The winner will be announced on 12 December.

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