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Bride destroys £999 wedding dress in sea and sand for ‘trash the dress’ photoshoot

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Angela and Mark in the sea
Angela destroyed her wedding dress in the sea (Picture: Adam Tranter/Mercury Press)

A bride got the most out of her wedding dress by jumping into the sea with it for a photoshoot with her new husband.

44-year-old Angela Hargate and her husband Mark, 46, decided to mess up the stunning £999 ivory lace strapless dress in the sea in their hometown of Blackpool.

Mark had booked the wedding as a surprise and only announced to Angela that she was getting married 12 weeks before the big day, leaving her with just three months to find the perfect dress.

But the newlyweds, who married in June this year, were determined to wear their wedding outfits more than once, so after their honeymoon they put on their full wedding attire for a second time to go for a dip with their children, Daisy, four, and Charlie, two.

Letting agent Angela said: ‘My dress was perfect, I knew it was for me as soon as I put it on and I’d tried on loads.

Angela and Mark posing in the sea
Angela didn’t want to just wear the dress on her wedding day (Picture: Adam Tranter/Mercury Press)

‘I only had 12 weeks to decide, but I went for something completely different to what I thought I would. It was slim and sophisticated.

‘After the wedding our photographer suggested the sea photoshoot, so we thought “why the hell not?” – it meant I got to wear my dress twice.

‘At first we thought “are you serious?” but we loved every minute.

‘It was even more fun than getting married.’

Angela had been married before, and her previous wedding dress has been hanging in her parents’ wardrobe for 13 years.

The thought of her second beautiful dress being left lonely at the back of the cupboard for decades was what inspired her to say yes to the unusual ‘trash the dress’ photoshoot.

The mum-of-two said: ‘I thought why not do something really fun and exciting and I get to wear my dress again.

‘We all got dressed up, even the kids, and just went down to the beach one evening.

Angela and Mark in the sea
Angela and Mark posed in the sea (Picture: Adam Tranter/Mercury Press)

‘It was just perfect. On my way into the sea, when I could see the dress getting wet and I thought “what am I doing?”

‘Then my husband made me go further out, all the way up to our waists.

‘But when our photographer, Adam, asked us to lay on the sand, Mark and I looked at each other and laughed.

‘Mark even fully submerged himself in the lovely Blackpool sea – luckily it wasn’t even that cold.

‘People were walking their dogs past and a few even said the kids were upstaging us.’

Angela’s parents, Marion, 71, and John, 73, had bought Angela’s £999 dress as a wedding present so she asked their permission before she paraded it in the waves.

She admitted when her parents saw the pictures they found the quirky photoshoot very different to the big day itself – a registry office service on Blackpool Promenade followed by bacon and sausage butties at the local cricket club.

She said: ‘Even though I’m 44, I still asked them if they’d mind and they just said it’s better than going in their wardrobe.

‘I don’t know what I’ll do with it now, I’ll probably get it dry cleaned and put it back in my mum and dad’s cupboard.’

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Lush Halloween collection is here, featuring spooky bathbombs and black slime soap

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Lush Halloween collection
The Lush Halloween collection (Picture: Lush/Getty)

We’ve already started talking about Christmas but don’t forget Halloween comes first.

The spookiest time of year is just over a month away.

To celebrate, handmade cosmetics brand Lush has rolled out their Halloween collection.

This year, it features four bath bombs, a bubble bar, soap and even a black shower slime.

The slime includes cornflour, bamboo stem and Xantham gum to make your skin soft and your shower a bit more fun. Don’t be put off by the colour, it smells like bubblegum to remind you of the trick and treat haul.

The bath bombs include a pumpkin shape (of course), a green one dedicated to ruler of the pagan Feast of Fools, Lord of Misrule, a monster’s eye and the astrologically inspired Mercury Retrograde.

With Mercury entering retrograde on Halloween this year, it could be a difficult one. Apparently it makes everyone more prone to confusion, misunderstanding and conflict so this soothing bath bomb is here to help.

The range also includes gift sets and some fun bath bomb holders for £1.50 each.

The collection is completely vegan and cruelty-free so no tricks, all treats.

The range went on sale last week and you’ll be able to pick it up in store or online until 31 October.

The full Lush Halloween range

Lush Halloween collection picture: LUSH METROGRAB
Punkin Pumpkin bath bomb – £4.95 (Picture: Lush)

Lush Halloween collection picture: LUSH METROGRAB
Lord of Misrule bath bomb – £4.50 (Picture: Lush)

Lush Halloween collection picture: LUSH METROGRAB
Monster’s Ball bath bomb – £5.50 (Picture: Lush)

Lush Halloween collection picture: LUSH METROGRAB
Mercury Retrograde bath bomb – £4.95 (Picture: Lush)

Lush Halloween collection picture: LUSH METROGRAB
Bewitched bubble bar – £5.50 (Picture: Lush)

Lush Halloween collection picture: LUSH METROGRAB
Sparkly Pumpkin bubble bar – £4.95 (Picture: Lush)

Lush Halloween collection picture: LUSH METROGRAB
Pumpkin Spice lip scrub – £6.50 (Picture: Lush)

Lush Halloween collection picture: LUSH METROGRAB
Boo! shower slime – £12.00 (Picture: Lush)

Lush Halloween collection picture: LUSH METROGRAB
Ghost in the Dark soap – £6.00 (Picture: Lush)

Lush Halloween collection picture: LUSH METROGRAB
Glow Worm fun -£4.95 (Picture: Lush)

Lush Halloween collection picture: LUSH METROGRAB
Little Box of Horrors gift set – £39.00 (Picture: Lush)

Lush Halloween collection picture: LUSH METROGRAB
Pumpkin knot wrap gift – £30.00 (Picture: Lush)

Lush Halloween collection picture: LUSH METROGRAB
Fireworks knot wrap – £12.00 (Picture: Lush)

Lush Halloween collection picture: LUSH METROGRAB
Out of space bath bomb holder – £1.50 (Picture: Lush)

Lush Halloween collection picture: LUSH METROGRAB
The Owl and the Pussycat bath bomb holder – £1.50 (Picture: Lush)

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Mum praises £4.50 cream for clearing up son’s eczema that left him screaming in pain

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Child's Farm Cream before and after
Lucas at four years old, and then at six (Picture: PA REAL LIFE/COLLECT)

There’s been a whole load of hype about the Child’s Farm moisturiser, and we’re normally loath to decry a cream as a miracle. However, it’s always great to see someone get good results from a product that’s inexpensive and full of goodness.

That’s exactly what happened for seven-year-old Lucas Ellis, who has suffered from eczema since he was a baby.

His mum, 28-year-old Michelle, said that strangers would stare at him in the street, due to red marks she likened to a ‘burns victim’.

Most sad for her to deal with, though, was the fact that Lucas was often left screaming in agony, as his inflamed skin would catch on clothes and get infected.

‘It started on his face then spread to his back, belly, legs and arms,’ said Michelle.

‘It was uncontrollable. There were open wounds all over his body, and they looked like burns. They would get infected for a month at a time. He would make them worse by scratching them.’

Mum praises £4.50 cream for clearing up son's eczema that left him screaming in pain
Lucas at eight months with mum, Michelle (Picture: PA REAL LIFE/COLLECT)

It wasn’t just his physical state that was affected by the condition either, as Michelle and her partner, Tom, began to notice that Lucas was starting to become agitated and angry; likely feeling powerless to understand or process his painful skin.

Michelle, who has two other children, Freddie, five, and Lilly, one – neither of whom have eczema – told how Lucas’ skin first started to get dry when he was just three weeks old, which she treated with baby moisturiser.

But then, when he was around five months old, things suddenly worsened, and he was constantly scratching.

Mum praises £4.50 cream for clearing up son's eczema that left him screaming in pain
Lucas’s leg before using Child’s Farm (Picture: PA REAL LIFE/COLLECT)

‘He would have big scabs on his face,’ added Michelle.

Treatment began in the standard way, with Michelle going to a doctor and being prescribed cream. This cream, though, stung his skin, and again left him crying and screaming.

Many more trips to the GP followed, with a dermatologist getting involved, and Lucas never finding the right solution for his eczema.

‘The eczema would always come back,’ Michelle explained.

‘Lucas would be scratching at night. In the morning, there would be blood under his fingernails and all over his legs and the sheets.’

Mum praises £4.50 cream for clearing up son's eczema that left him screaming in pain
Aged four (Picture: PA REAL LIFE/COLLECT)

When he was eventually prescribed steroid cream at age five, it seemed to help on Lucas’ face, but his arms and legs got worse, and the scabs and sores seemed worse than ever, with the toddler’s ankles swelling up as a result.

It was last summer that the family turned to the Child’s Farm baby moisturiser, which costs £4.50 a bottle, and a has a cult following online.

‘I was pretty sceptical about trying it because I’d tried so many others and thought nothing was going to help,’ Michelle said.

Mum praises £4.50 cream for clearing up son's eczema that left him screaming in pain
The poor tot was unable to walk due to the pain (Picture: PA REAL LIFE/COLLECT)

‘It stung Lucas a bit when I put it on because of the open wounds, but nowhere near as much as the other creams we had tried.

‘Within two days, you could see the moisture returning to his arms and legs, and after about a week it really started to clear up.’

Within two weeks, Michelle says that Lucas’ eczema was completely cleared. Although there’s no cure for eczema, finding a product that can manage symptoms like that – particularly in children – can be elating after long periods of not finding relief from itching and pain.

Michelle says: ‘Looking back, I realise how stressful it was. It’s nice to see him happier as it was heartbreaking to see my boy in such pain.’

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You could get paid £30 an hour to serve food at a wedding if you’re willing to do it naked

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A nudist wedding
Could this be your dream job? (Picture: Getty)

A couple is looking for staff to wait at their wedding – but you have to be comfortable doing it totally naked.

The couple is offering a £30 an hour wage to anyone who thinks they may fit the job description.

The engaged couple are naturists, and are looking for four waiting and two bar staff who are comfortable serving nude guests while also being naked themselves – because they’re not ‘comfortable in the presence of clothed people’.

The job advertisement was posted on Bark.com last weekend, after their previous wedding staff cancelled due to the nature of their wedding.

The wedding will be held at the groom’s family home in Berkshire and will host 30 guests who will all attend completely nude.

And apparently, their staff being nude too will make the wedding ‘100% authentic’.

The request states: ‘My fiancé and I are naturists and fully celebrate that way of life, as do all of our family and friends, so having a nude wedding was the only way we wanted to promise ourselves to one another.

Naked diners eating dinner
You could get paid £30 an hour (Picture: Getty)

‘We had previously considered having clothed staff but we do not feel comfortable in the presence of clothed people, so why would we want to feel uncomfortable on the most special day of our lives?

‘To say finding staff who are happy to work naked has been tough is an understatement. We’ve been let down by three sets of people so far, with the last ones initially agreeing and then as the day nears pulling out at the last minute, it’s incredibly stressful.

‘We know that this isn’t something the average waiter would be happy doing, but we’re hoping that we can find people out there who are comfortable in their own skin or are naturists too.

‘We’re not even bothered if they have waiting experience at this point, as long as they are professional and polite! We’re getting married on the 2nd of October so due to the late notice and obvious uniqueness to our circumstances, we are willing to pay a bit more than average, £30 and hour, to anyone willing to help.’

If you think what you’ve got to take to serve dishes in the buff, you can apply online.

Bark.com co-founder, Kai Feller said: ‘Your wedding is one of the biggest days of your life, so although this isn’t a normal request it is understandable that the couple wants to be fully comfortable on their big day.

‘We pride ourselves at Bark.com on our ability to connect customers with the right professionals, no matter how crazy the job is. It’s clear that this couple has really struggled to find waiting staff, so if you are a fellow naturist or just comfortable being nude, please get in touch!’

MORE: Bride destroys £999 wedding dress in sea and sand for ‘trash the dress’ photoshoot

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What is unconscious name bias and why is it so damaging?

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Illustration of black woman looking confused
‘I want to say – what were you expecting? A white woman?’ (Picture: Ella Byworth/mylo)

Bias is unfair prejudice or discrimination against someone based on an external factor like their skin colour, race, gender or religion.

But one type of prejudice that is rarely spoken about is unconscious name bias. It happens all the time and the negative impact can be enormous.

Picture the scene. A white, male manager receives a CV with a name at the top. Rather than looking at the reams of experience and qualifications on the CV he gets stuck on the fact that he doesn’t know how to pronounce the applicant’s name. He picks up the next CV. John Smith. You can make an educated guess about who is more likely to get an interview.

This scenario is all too common. Minority applicants have to send, on average, 60% more job applications to get a positive response from employers compared to their white counterparts.

It’s so common in fact that in 2016 the CBI called for the removal of candidates’ names from job applications to create a more dynamic and diverse workforce.

The ‘unconscious’ part means that this bias is happening unintentionally. Someone will hear a name and if that name doesn’t register as something they recognise or are comfortable with, they may treat them differently without even knowing that they are doing it.

It is often related to race. If a name sounds African, Indian or anything non-Western, people may make assumptions about that person or rule them out of opportunities.

It manifests as not being considered for interviews despite having all the right experience or being denied on rental applications for no apparent reason.

MENISSA SALEM: I'm sick of one type of muslim woman being portrayed
‘So if we can’t address and acknowledge people’s humanism on such a basic, basic level, then what hope do we have?’ (Picture: Ella Byworth for Metro.co.uk)

People can make snap judgements about names for other reasons too – like assuming that someone with a double-barreled surname is privileged or ‘posh’ – but it is the racial element that makes this kind of bias so damaging.

Julia Bernard-Thompson is a business consultant and is passionate about addressing unconscious bias in the workplace. She is also a Trinidadian immigrant – something that frequently shocks people after hearing her name.

‘They will say, “You don’t sound like a Julia Bernard-Thompson”, and I’ll say “Oh, what does a Julia Bernard-Thompson look like?” And they will flush red because they will realise what they have just said out loud.

‘I want to say “What were you expecting? A white woman?”

‘Often, the person who acts out the bias is completely oblivious to the fact that they have just completely discounted that person’s culture, history and upbringing.

‘A person’s name is the first thing you ask anybody, anywhere, in any circumstances. It is even the first thing that you learn when you’re learning a new language – hell, my name is…

‘So if we can’t address and acknowledge people’s humanism on such a basic, basic level, then what hope do we have?’

Your name is something that, usually, you have no say in choosing. It is something that is given to you by your parents. It is usually imbibed with meaning that is unique to you and your family, so to have that used against you can be incredibly hurtful.

Unconscious bias – in any form – is particularly insidious. It perpetuates racial discrimination and is really difficult for victims to call out because the perpetrators don’t even know they are doing it. But ignorance is not an excuse.

Julia giving her Ted Talk
‘With any kind of bias, you have to be willing to look at your own behaviour.’ (Picture: TedxFolkestone 2019)

Julia thinks it’s vital that employers and people in all forms of power make an effort to check their unconscious behaviour.

‘You have to call it out,’ she says. ‘In yourself and in others where you can. With any kind of bias, you have to be willing to look at your own behaviour.

‘If someone introduces themselves and they have an unusual name – do not shorten the person’s name to something more English or easier for you to say. That’s not how they introduced themselves.

‘Own up to the fact that you will probably mispronounce their name. Ask them how to pronounce and tell them that you want to get it right. Ask them how their mother pronounces their name. People really appreciate that attempt and the acknowledgement that your name is important to you.

‘Like anything, if you admit that it is a problem, and you show willing to address the problem, then people are usually willing to help you to address the problem and that’s how it gets solved.’

‘It’s such a simple thing to take the extra time, to have someone spell out their name for you. It really isn’t that difficult and it could really make a world of difference too people feeling seen and valued.’

The financial impact of unconscious name bias is real. As well as missing out on potential professional opportunities, a report in The Sun last year found that a car insurance applicant named Mohammed was quoted hundreds of pounds more than one called John. In fact, five insurance companies quoted Mohammed between £205 and £919 more.

metro illustrations
‘It means being honest with ourselves and with the conclusions we come to when we see a name that is unusual to us.’ (Picture: Ella Byworth for Metro.co.uk)

Ifeoluwa Victoria Oladele, who now goes by Victoria, says name bias is something that she’s experienced at various levels of employment.

‘The higher up I go, the more I expect it to be the norm,’ she explains. ‘I have completely given up on providing my full name, so I just say the shorthand.

‘It started in primary school. My whole name was on the register but I never got called by it. I was just called Vicky, because it’s what they could pronounce out of the list.

‘It’s funny because being African, you can have several names and the family pick and choose what they want but they respect all of them. At work, they don’t attempt to know the meaning and they pick what’s convenient for them.’

Victoria feels so strongly about this issue that she co-authored a children’s book empowering children to get to know the meaning of their own name.

She says: ‘It stems from stigma and a lack of willingness to learn or pronounce your name correctly.

‘Unless you’re famous, your “foreign sounding name” gets no respect.’

Antonina Mamzenko’s name is Russian and Ukranian. She says she has always suspected that her name played in part in the lack of responses she got from job applications after graduating.

‘I remember applying for jobs after finishing my Master’s degree here in the UK and even though I was definitely more than qualified and my CV was in top shape, I almost never heard back or got invited for interviews.

‘I could only assume it was my name and was half-considering applying for jobs under an alias to see if it was the case (I never did do that – but it would have been a great experiment!).

‘It was very frustrating to say the least and really undermined my confidence. It was the first time I had experienced bias like that.’

Antonina started up her own photography business nine years ago and those fears about unconscious bias came back to her as she thought about attracting new customers.

‘I considered creating a more “British” sounding alias or a “neutral” company name,’ she explains.

‘Luckily, I never found anything that felt more “me” than my own name, so I stuck with it. And even though it was tricky in the beginning while I was still finding my feet and confidence, I’m really happy that I stuck with it.

‘It allowed me to build a strong personal brand and attract a very open-minded and international client base.’

Tackling unconscious bias – in all its forms – is critical if we are to destabilise the hierarchies of power that continue to limit the progression and advancements of minorities.

Julia says that an acknowledgement of the issue is the first step and removing the ‘unconscious’ element of this ind of bias is the only way to dismantle it.

‘In a utopian world, in a future reimagined, bias, discrimination or prejudice including “namism” wouldn’t exist. But it does and admitting it exists means examining our reaction to different, to other,’ says Julia.

‘It means being honest with ourselves and with the conclusions, we come to when we see a name that is unusual to us.’

You can here more of Julia’s thoughts about unconscious name bias in her Ted Talk.

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Woman’s viral Twitter picture shows what it’s like travelling while being a black woman

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Yasmin in Alice Springs - Australia
Yasmin in Alice Springs, Australia where she was asked if she was a cleaner while enjoying a stay at a fancy hotel (Picture: Yasmin Joseph)

Many people have spoken out about the reality of travelling while black – the experience is uniquely different from other travellers.

Some black travellers experience overt racism and catcalling, as well as frequent microaggressions – well-intentioned or absent-minded actions that can be hostile, derogatory, or negatively prejudicial in some way.

One black woman who wanted to highlight the severity tweeted a picture of something that happens to her a lot – people staring.

Yasmin Joseph, a playwright and producer from London shared an image of herself while she travelled solo throughout Malaga, Spain.

She asked followers to zoom into the background of the picture where two European-looking people were seen straining their neck to watch her.

What resulted from the post was a series of other black people who shared similar experiences of being gawked at while they lived their life.

The looks are so prevalent that Yasmin has to consider which countries are not accustomed to seeing people of colour before she visits.

Though she said it was ‘exhausting’ to see this happen all the time, Yasmin tells Metro.co.uk she’s not discouraged from travelling and urgers others not to be either.

Yasmin in Morocco
Yasmin in Morocco. She has to refrain from certain clothes if shes visiting busy places like markets (Picture: Yasmin Joseph)

She explains: ‘This happens to me most places I go to in the world so sometimes it’s refreshing when I go to black countries like in the Caribbean or when I’m somewhere it’s normal to be black and I can just sink in and explore.

‘Although I am different from the people there, there’s just not that feeling of being in a zoo as with European countries.’

Yasmin received an ‘overwhelming’ number of responses from people sharing the same type of story.

She adds: ‘The repercussions of those people staring and how their body language makes black people feel when they occupy those spaces, is that they can actually make people feel unsafe. Lots of messages I’ve received have been of this vein.

‘It’s exhausting having to confront people. Just mind your own business and let people enjoy their lives.’

Yasmin thinks the pictures shared are telling of the way black women’s bodies are viewed.

She adds: ‘As a curvy woman going into a pool, people stare and it’s almost like my body is impolite like it’s an imposition and they’re like “how dare you bring that to the pool as I sit here with my family?”.’

‘People look at you until you feel uncomfortable and you have to push through and it can take its toll.’

But there are some nuances to travelling while black, she adds. When she’s with her boyfriend, the male presence can help to curtail the number of microaggressions.

When she’s with her female black friends, it can be amplified.

In places where strangers have taken her picture without permission, Yasmin has had to confront them, asking them what it is about her that makes a picture so compelling.

Yasmin remembers an incident in Dubai where she was holidaying with family and a woman asked to take a picture of her. When she asked why, the woman replied saying she enjoyed Yasmin’s style and that she was beautiful.

While Yasmin could appreciate the sentiment, she didn’t like the idea of strangers storing images of her nor the feeling of being a spectacle.

She adds: ‘It’s a sense of entitlement. People feel really offended when you don’t want to partake.

‘They don’t care about the holiday you’ve paid for or the solitude you’ve actively sought for by travelling alone. They feel that them finding you attractive should be more important than what you want to do with your day, that it’s more important than your privacy.’

Yasmin in Dominica
In countries with a large black population, Yasmin feels less ‘like an animal in a zoo’  (Picture: Yasmin Joseph)

Yasmin notes that it happens in European countries more than others. While she would like to say something in certain scenarios, it detracts from her holiday and takes away her own enjoyment from it, having to explain what’s wrong with the behaviour each time.

She says you need a fine balance of ignoring, reacting, and getting on with it.

‘Sometimes I turn around and wave other times I stare or ask them to stop, sometimes I ask them if they’re okay. If people want to chat, say that I’m happy to start a conversation.’

Some people on the thread considered whether Yasmin was simply being looked at for taking a selfie in a public place and not because she’s black.

To that, she says: ‘When the cameras are down, the looks continue and if that couple had stared into the ocean as they had been doing before a black woman turned up to the place, they wouldn’t have been in the shot.’

She also points out that many others were also pictured with their starers, despite not being in any highly public areas.

‘Your white counterpart could do the exact same thing and people will not bat an eyelid.’

‘With all the things black women are up against in this world, I would urge them to not let ogling weirdos stop them from seeking those experiences and to travel regardless.’

‘And white people, just be mindful of your behaviour and body language.’

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10 women from the same family who all had breast cancer celebrate getting the all-clear with a charity calendar

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Jane Reeson, Shirley Limb, Margaret Bedford, Mary Limb, Lorraine Hill, Joyce Waite, Hazel Holland, Barbara Limb and Vanessa Haw
Jane Reeson, Shirley Limb, Margaret Bedford, Mary Limb, Lorraine Hill, Joyce Waite, Hazel Holland, Barbara Limb and Vanessa Haw (Picture: John Aron / SWNS)

These 10 women have come together for a charity calendar after they all had breast cancer.

The women are all from the same family and over the last 17 years, they’ve all been treated for the disease.

The group is aged from 47 to 81 and the includes mums and daughters, aunties and sisters-in-law, with eight being blood relatives.

The family’s battle started in 2002 when Joyce Waite, 78, was diagnosed and ended when her nephew’s partner Jane Reeson, 54, in 2017.

Now the women are coming together for the calendar, which is part of numerous fundraising events organised by Vanessa Haw.

Vanessa, 55, a shop owner from Coningsby, Lincs., has also set up a Facebook group sharing her family’s experiences.

She was diagnosed with cancer after an annual mammogram in April 2015.

In May 2015, Vanessa had a left-sided mastectomy and had all lymph nodes removed from her left arm, followed by more operations to remove damaged skin and a right mastectomy in October 2016 as a precaution.

Jane Reeson, Shirley Limb, Margaret Bedford, Mary Limb, Lorraine Hill, Joyce Waite, Hazel Holland, Barbara Limb and Vanessa Haw
Nine of the ten women from the same family who had breast cancer (Picture: John Aron / SWNS)

She said: ‘We’ve all fought cancer together as a family and shared our experiences with each other which has really helped.

‘The fact ten of us have gone through it has been a huge help.

‘We’re a close family so we’ve been there for each other.

‘That support and knowing someone had breast cancer but survived has been brilliant.

‘Even on the worst days, you knew there was life, there was hope.

‘I had my last yearly mammogram in April 2015. I got called back and had to have a deep core biopsy whilst I was there.

‘I got diagnosed with breast cancer four days later.’

Vanessa refused radiotherapy because of how it affected her mother Barbara Limb who was diagnosed with cancer in 2003.

Barbara Limb (Picture: SWNS)
Barbara Limb (Picture: SWNS)

Barbara, 81, was the second woman in the family to be diagnosed with cancer.

She started experiencing pain in her breast in July 2003 and went to her GP

She was referred to Grantham Hospital and had a mammogram and two biopsies before being diagnosed with breast cancer.

She said: ‘I was sat at my friend’s house when she said to me “Barbara you have got a pain” and she asked me what the pain was like.

‘When I told her she said it was the same sort of pain she had. She made me go to the GP that afternoon.

‘The doctor saw me and got in touch with the local hospital and the next week they did a mammogram and a biopsy on the same day.

‘The doctor said that there was something there but they had missed it so I had to return for a second biopsy and the results confirmed I had breast cancer.

‘I had my op on 19 August 2003 and had lymph nodes removed and a lumpectomy.

‘This was followed by a full course of radiotherapy which still burns me all these years later. But I’m a survivor.’

Trudie Smart (Picture: SWNS)
Trudie Smart (Picture: SWNS)

Barbara’s niece Trudie Smart, 47, a teaching assistant from Boston, Lincs., was diagnosed with breast cancer in April 2008.

She had eight cycles of chemotherapy before having a mastectomy in November that year followed by three weeks of radiotherapy.

She said: ‘My breast cancer was ER+ which meant I produced too much estrogen so I opted to have my ovaries removed.’

Just months after her diagnosis, her mum Shirley Limb, 72, of Kirton, Lincs.., was diagnosed in September 2008.

Shirley was given the news following a routine mammogram.

She had a lumpectomy and lymph nodes removed just before Christmas that year.

She then had radiotherapy every day for three weeks and was told she was in remission in the summer of 2009.

Lorraine Hill (Picture: SWNS)
Lorraine Hill (Picture: SWNS)

Despite not being a blood-relative, Vanessa’s brother’s partner Lorraine Hill, 61, was diagnosed after finding a large lump in her breast in 2005.

The barmaid and mum-of-one, from Horncastle, Lincs., had chemotherapy to shrink the tumour before undergoing a partial mastectomy.

Sister-in-law Hazel Holland, 53, was also struck down when she had a mammogram in February 2015.

The mum-of-two and breakfast club supervisor had an operation in March that year to remove a lump and lymph nodes, followed by chemotherapy and radiotherapy.

She said: ‘I just took it all in my stride and got on with life.”

Three years earlier in 2012, Hazel’s mum Mary Limb, 74, was told she had breast cancer after doctors found a lump.

She was in hospital for four days after her operation to remove the lump and lymph nodes followed by radiotherapy.

Mary Limb (Picture: SWNS)
Mary Limb (Picture: SWNS)

Two years later Mary’s sister-in-law Margaret Bedford, 74, was diagnosed in August 2017.

The mum-of-three had a lumpectomy the next month and following four weeks of gruelling radiotherapy was declared cancer-free.

A month later, in October 2017, her son David’s partner Jane Reeson, 54, was diagnosed with cancer.

The timeline of diagnoses

2002 – Joyce Waite
2003 – Barbara Limb
2005 – Lorraine Hill
2007 – Shirley Limb
2008 – Trudie Smart
2012 – Mary Limb
2015 – Hazel Holland
2015 – Vanessa Haw
2017 – Margaret Bedford
2017 – Jane Reeson

The delivery driver and mum-of-two children had a mastectomy on her left side in November that year.

She has been told to take estrogen-blocker Tamoxifen for five years but so far all tests have come back clear.

She said: ‘I couldn’t feel a lump at all, so if it hadn’t been for the mammogram it could have been a different story.

‘Obviously knowing what many members of the family had gone through meant I was conscious of the importance of getting regular check-ups.’

The family’s calendar will be officially launched next month with all proceeds going to the charity Breast Cancer Care.

MORE: You could get paid £30 an hour to serve food at a wedding if you’re willing to do it naked

MORE: Woman’s viral Twitter picture shows what it’s like travelling while being a black woman

Poundland launches new cocktail inspired scented candles for £1 each

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The new candles
These candles look amazing (Picture: Getty/Poundland)

If your favourite thing is stocking up on scented candles to fill your room with all kinds of wonderful scents, we’ve got some great news for you: Poundland has just launched a new range of cocktail inspired candles.

The new candles come in three well-known scents: Rhubarb & Ginger, Prosecco Fizz and Bellini Surprise.

The Bellini surprise is described as being sweet and fruity, and we’re guessing because the drink is peach liqueur based, it’ll smell like peaches. Lovely.

The rhubarb and ginger candle
The rhubarb and ginger candle sounds lovely (Picture: Poundland)

The Prosecco Fizz is said to smell fruity and crisp, while the Rhubarb & Ginger is sweet and fiery.

In true Poundland fashion, each candle costs just £1 and are available in stores nationwide.

Obviously, we’ll have to stock up on all three – and given the price tag, probably a whole lot more.

The bellini candle
The bellini candle (Picture: Poundland)

In other candle news, Aldi has launched some dessert themed candles, and they sound just as lovely.

The candles cost £2.79 each and come in four scents: coconut cake, marshmallow fluff cake (um, YUM), strawberry pavlova and jaffa cake.

And they come coloured like the desserts, too – the coconut candle is white, the marsmallow candle is pink, the strawberry pavlova is red and the jaffa cake is orange.

The candles are all wick candles in glass jars and come with a metal lid.

The website says: ‘Perfect for those who have a sweet tooth, this candle will ensure your house smells welcoming and especially pleasant for guests.’

MORE: Woman’s viral Twitter picture shows what it’s like travelling while being a black woman

MORE: What is unconscious name bias and why is it so damaging?


Gingerbread houses are out, but Cadbury Chocolate Cottage kits are in

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Cadbury's Chocolate Cottage kit
Easy to make? We’ll be the judges of that! (Picture: Getty – Cadbury)

Gingerbread houses are so last year.

That is if you’re a chocolate fan, and instead want to opt for a Cadbury Chocolate Cottage kit instead.

The kit has been brought out for 2019 and has everything you need to make your very own house of chocolate (then see how long it lasts before you eat it).

It includes the limited edition Cadbury with gingerbread bars – so you can still get your Christmassy fix – which make up the front and back walls.

You then melt offcuts of Dairy Milk to use as cement, and then use standard Dairy Milk bars for the other walls.

Cadbury's Christmas Cottage Picture: Cadbury
Your finished creationg SHOULD look like the one on the box (Picture: Cadbury)

For the roof, you’ll have the Winter Wonderland bars, which feature little Christmas trees of white and milk chocolate, a Flake for the top, and white chocolate Buttons for decoration.

The kit costs £16, but you’ll have to provide your own icing to make it look exactly like the pictures. We’re sure you’ll want a little extra for dusting too, of course.

It’s proven so popular in the day that it’s been out that the confectionery company are already having to restock it. That should be done tomorrow (18 September), but you’ll likely want to snap it up quickly.

You can get yours on the Cadbury website.

You may think that it’s a little early to be thinking of the festive season, but stores like Sainsbury’s have already stocked up on mince pies and Christmas pudding.

It may also be worth pre-planning your chocolate intake, given some of the most popular choc boxes of the season have got smaller for another year. They’re now 45% smaller compared to ten years ago.

Time for a chocolate house to keep your sugar levels up!

MORE: Poundland launches new cocktail inspired scented candles for £1 each

MORE: What is unconscious name bias and why is it so damaging?

World’s coolest neighbourhoods have been revealed and four of them are in the UK

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Time Out 50 coolest neighbourhoods
Astoria in New York, Peckham in London, Ancoats in Manchester and Arroios in Lisbon (Picture: Getty)

Every city is filled with a patchwork of neighbourhoods, all offering different things.

Your experience of visiting somewhere can be very different, depending on the area you choose to spend your time in.

To help you find THE places to go across the world, Time Out has revealed a list of the 50 coolest neighbourhoods in the world.

They surveyed more than 27,000 people around the world to pick out the places with lots of cool new openings and things to do at affordable prices.

They also asked Time Out editors and contributing writers who know these cities to pinpoint areas with a huge buzz.

These aren’t tourist hotspots but more likely to be slightly out of the centre, where all the locals hang out.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BqE2i2NFQSr/

Time Out explained: ‘We wanted to know: are there great new venues opening? Can most people still afford to live there?

‘Is it a place where travellers can discover the best of a city’s up-and-coming art, culture, food and drink?

‘And most importantly: does it instinctively feel like a neighbourhood whose star is on the rise?

‘Then we argued a bit, ranked each neighbourhood against 49 others from across the world, and came up with what we reckon is the definitive list of the planet’s cultural and culinary hotspots right now.’

Nowhere in the UK made the top 10 but there are four British areas on the full top 50 list: Peckham in south London at number 11, Ancoats in Manchester at 27, Easton in Bristol at 35 and Kelvinbridge in Glasgow at 38.

Top of the list is Arorios in Lisbon, followed by Shimokitazawa, Tokyo and Onikan in Lagos.

The full Time Out coolest neighbourhoods list

Residential buildings in Arroios district Lisbon, capital city of Portugal; Shutterstock ID 1358028839; Purchase Order: -
Arroios, Lisbon (Picture: Shutterstock / Fotokon)

1. Arroios, Lisbon

2. Shimokitazawa, Tokyo

3. Onikan, Lagos

4. Wedding, Berlin

5. Historic Filipinotown, Los Angeles

6. The Waterfront, Hobart

7. Strasbourg-Saint-Denis, Paris

Astoria, New York (Picture: Getty)

8. Astoria, New York

9. Embajadores, Madrid

10. Pilsen, Chicago

HDR image of central London on a summer afternoon, taken from a rooftop in Peckham.
Peckham, London (Picture: Getty)

11. Peckham, London

12. Soi Pridi Banomyong/Phra Khanong, Bangkok

13. Footscray, Melbourne

14. Zhongshan, Taipei

15. Kerem Hatelmanim and Shuk HaCarmel, Tel Aviv

16. Kypseli, Athens

17. Jalatlaco, Oaxaca

18. District 3, Ho Chi Minh City

19. Juárez, Mexico City

20. Poblenou, Barcelona

21. Jamestown, Accra

22. Verdun, Montreal

23. Overseas Chinese Town, Shenzhen

24. Holly, Austin

25. Bom Retiro, São Paulo

26. Katendrecht, Rotterdam

A view of a basin and a pathway part of the Rochdale canal in the area of Ancoats, Manchester. This is a tranquil residential neighbourhood where some people lives on barges.
Ancoats, Manchester (Picture: Getty

27. Ancoats, Manchester

28. Corktown, Detroit

29. Gemmayzeh and Mar Mikhaël, Beirut

30. Barranco, Lima

32. Vesterbro, Copenhagen

33. Naeja-dong, Seoul

34. Yppenplatz and Brunnenmarkt, Vienna

35. Easton, Bristol

36. The Junction, Toronto

37. Kadıköy-Moda, Istanbul

38. Kelvinbridge, Glasgow

39. Oltrarno, Florence

40. Old Havana, Havana

41. Melville, Johannesburg

A view of Stoneybatter and Cabra areas of Dublin. On Wednesday, March 27, 2019, in Dublin, Ireland. (Photo by Artur Widak/NurPhoto via Getty Images)
Stoneybatter, Dublin (Picture: Artur Widak/NurPhoto)

42. Stoneybatter, Dublin

43. Bartók, Budapest

44. Downtown, Miami

45. Tanjong Pagar, Singapore

46. Nové Město, Prague

47. Bandra West, Mumbai

48. Sai Ying Pun, Hong Kong

49. Old Xuhui, Shanghai

50. Dorćol, Belgrade

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There’s now a diamond jewellery advent calendar – but it’ll set you back £100,000

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The diamond filled calendar
The calendar costs £100,000 (Picture: Beaverbrooks)

Chocolate advent calendars are no longer the most exciting thing about the countdown to Christmas, as all sorts of calendars are available now – offering beauty products, bath bombs and even alcohol.

And now, you can get an advent calendar filled to the brim with diamond jewellery… but it will set you back £100,000.

Jewellers Beaverbrooks has launched the new calendar, which features a diamond gift within each of its 25 drawers, in celebration of its 100th birthday this year.

The first-of-its-kind, new and exclusive advent calendar includes diamond rings, necklaces, earrings, bracelets, watches and jewellery sets, including diamond encrusted pieces from Gucci, Omega and TAG Heuer.

The selection includes a Once Platinum Diamond Solitaire Ring worth £26,000, as well as a number of pieces including a £975 9ct White Gold Diamond Pendant from Beaverbrooks’ True Connections collection.

The expensive calendar
You’ll make a saving of £23,000 (Picture: Beaverbrooks)

Other products include pieces from the jewellers’ Beyond Brilliance collection, such as the Beyond Brilliance 18ct White Gold and Rose Gold Diamond Earrings, £4,250, which feature Beaverbrooks’ exclusive 100 facet diamond.

As mentioned above, the calendar will set you back £100,00, which is £23,000 less than purchasing the jewellery individually.

We know, that’s a huge amount of money that most of us don’t have lying around.

But if you do, have fun going all out.

Lorna Haddon, head of diamonds and jewellery at Beaverbrooks, said: ‘For a century, we’ve been passionate about diamonds, so we’re extremely excited to announce the launch of our diamond-a-day advent calendar in celebration of our 100th Christmas at Beaverbrooks.

Someone opening a diamond ring from the calendar
It features 25 days of gifts (Picture: Beaverbrooks)

‘Creating an advent calendar from some of our most beautiful diamond products has been a dream job for me, with each piece hand-selected to ensure the utmost beauty and sparkle in every drawer.

‘We’ve been a part of our customers’ treasured Christmas memories for a century, helping them choose the most meaningful gifts for their loved ones.

‘Never mind chocolate, this really is the dream advent calendar for diamond and jewellery lovers!’

MORE: Nivea launches two advent calendars for Christmas so you can pamper your skin

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Bake Off 2019: How to make a spiced winter cheesecake for dairy week

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There’s a new theme on the Great British Bake Off tonight – dairy week.

Yes, this episode is heavy on the lactose.

Bakers in the tent have to tackle a dairy cake for the signature, a Tudor themed technical and for the showstopper, it’s an assortment of mishti – a type if Indian sweet.

To get involved with the theme, we have a recipe for winter spiced cheesecake from Patisserie Valerie.

They’ve already shown us how to make a fruit cake, biscotti and Foccacia this series so we are excited about this creamy concoction.

Apparently, this one is a best seller and they have a secret spice blend but you can make it to your own taste with warming spices like cinnamon, mixed spice and nutmeg.

It sounds perfect for the winter months but you can get some practice in now.

Ingredients for the winter spiced cheesecake

Base:

155g digestive crumb

35g brown sugar

60g butter or margarine

The spiced winter cheesecake for Bake Off from Patisserie Valerie
The spiced winter cheesecake (Picture: Metro.co.uk)

Cheesecake filling:

500g cream cheese

120g caster sugar

16g cornflour

1 x egg yolk

1 x whole egg

150ml cream

1tsp vanilla extract

Spices to taste

Method for the winter spiced cheesecake

Base:

Crush digestives in a freezer bag with a rolling pin or in a food processor.

Melt your butter then mix in the brown sugar and digestive crumb.

Press the mix into the bottom of your cheesecake ring/springform tin.

Top Tip: If you like your cheesecake base extra-crisp, bake it for ten minutes before you add the topping.

Filling:

Mix cream cheese with the sugar, vanilla extract and cornflour until smooth. Then, add the eggs and cream mix until smooth.

Pour the cream filling on top of base and smooth to a flat top.

Top tip: give your cheesecake a little shake before baking to ensure it settles down smoothly.

Bake at 100-110 degrees for around 70 minutes.

When ready it should be set around the edges and wobbly in the middle. If yours isn’t after 70 minutes, simply return to oven for a little longer.

MORE: Paul Hollywood will consume 13,500 calories during Bake Off 2019 and we couldn’t be more jealous

MORE: Bake Off 2019: How to make focaccia for bread week

Best coffee machines for 2019

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For some of us, coffee is more than a drink of choice – it’s a daily requirement.

Whether you look for coffee on the go, iced coffee or a machine that wakes you up with a cup, there’s a coffee machine for you.

From the brand Opumo new coffee alarm clock that looks like soemthing out of Willy Wonka, to pods that make larger cups (great for pouring over a glass full of ice) and a new frother that makes COLD FROTH, here’s the coffee gadgets you need to know about.

The coffee alarm clock

Opumo Coffee Alarm Clock in White
(Picture: Opumo)

What’s better than having your first cup of coffee in the morning? Being woken up with a cup made for you by this fancy new coffee alarm clock.

If black coffee leaves you cold, there is a milk vessel that keeps your milk cool in the night and mixes it for you so that your cup is exactly how you want it when the timer goes off and you open your eyes.

Or if you want to just brew on demand and not wait until morning, just hit the ‘Make’ button.

Works with filter or espresso coffee (or tea!) and comes in stainless steel and glass on top of a timber tray – in black or white.

Barisieur Black Coffee Alarm Clock, £345, opumo.com

For the purists

Melitta Purista
(Picture: Melitta)

This new machine is billed one of the world’s narrowest fully automatic bean to cup machines. Called the Melitta Puristam, it is great for super-slim kitchens where space is a commodity.

It has a one touch feature that includes a favourite coffee memory, is easy cleaning and a modern looking LED display.

It’s also really quiet (bonus for early morning brewing) and has a pump feature that lets water flow more slowly through the coffee, which is supposed to improve the coffee extraction.

There is a double cup mode which means you can make two coffees at the same time too.

Purista by Melitta, £399.99, via Amazon and AO.com 

Quick and fuss-free

Lavazza Idola Coffe Machine
(Picture: Lavazza)

Ideal for those looking for a quick caffeine fix, the Lavazza Idola Capsule Coffee Machine is ready to go in under 30 seconds.

Sporty looking, it makes espresso, lungo and long coffees – it also has a free flow function if you like a bit more water in your coffee – making it a good one for a summer iced brew.

Simple controls, easy to use and a removable 1.1 litre water tank with descale and low water warning lights with an auto shut-off after 9 minutes.

Lavazza Idola Coffee Machine £109, lakeland.co.uk

For the bean-curious

Melitta AromaFresh Grind & Brew
(Picture: Melitta)

For those of you out there that are ‘bean curious’, the AromaFresh Grind & Brew has an integrated grinder for fresh coffee beans if that’s what you like but gives you the option to switch off the grinder if you want to simplify things and use ground coffee.

There is a also a timer on the machine that lets you say exactly when you want to smell the coffee brewing in the morning.

AromaFresh Grind & Brew by Melitta, £119, amazon.co.uk

When bigger is better

Nespresso by Krups VertuoPlus Titanium
(Picture: Nespresso)

These are the long, tall coffees by Nespresso.

A new system with bigger capsules – so if you are into the pod thing and you like your coffee large and in charge, this is the one you want.

Pod-wise, you can choose between a range of large sizes with Alto being the biggest – it makes enough to fill a giant travel mug.

Lovely design, decent price and easy to use.

Nespresso by Krups VertuoPlus, £109 ao.com

Go-to grinder

Beko Bean-To-Cup Cofee Machine
(Picture: Beko)

This Bean-To-Cup Coffee Machine from Beko has a nifty milk frother inside that draws milk from an external container before heating it internally, meaning it gives good froth.

It also has a built-in coffee grinder, which gives you the option to use both whole beans and coffee grounds.

What’s new is a coffee strength adjustment, which lets you personalise how you make it, controlling the strength and depth of your brew.

Beko Bean-To-Cup Coffee Machine, £350, Beko.co.uk

The coffee ninja

Ninja Coffee Machine
(Picture: Ninja Kitchen)

The Ninja Coffee Bar bills itself as more than simply a coffee machine but rather as a complete coffee bar.

It comes with a 40-page recipe book including all the different ways you can mix up your morning cup.

The warming plate is a nice addition – it lets you keep your coffee at the optimum temperature for a further 30 minutes after its first brewed.

The Ninja Coffee Bar, £74.99 ninjakitchen

Small and perfectly foamed

Jura Milk Frother
(Picture: Jura)

A lovely airy and light little gadget that lets you make a fresh, creamy, milk foam that can be made hot or cold. Ideal for iced coffee.

Called the Jura Automatic Milk Frother, this one is also great for the tricky white part of the flat white.

Jura Automatic Milk Frother, £79.95, uk.jura.com

The Dolce deal

Nescafe Dolce Gusto
(Picture: The Original Factory Shop)

If you looking to bag a bargain this summer, the Nescafe Dolce Gusto offers great bang for your buck.

Currently 60% off, it has a quick preheating function so it works fast – and the volume selector on the coffee machine lets you tailor the length of your drink to just the way you like it. The machine automatically stops at the selected level when done.

Nescafe Dolce Gusto,  £49 (normally £109.99), The Original Factory Shop

 

The Showerhead

Russell Hobbs Buckingham Coffee Machine
(Picture: Russell Hobbs)

Called The Buckingham, this one features ‘advanced showerhead technology’ (basically the water sprays all around over the ground coffee to offer a better distribution) which makers promise delivers richer coffee flavour with less waste in the filter.

Reaches optimum brewing temp very fast and can make and can make 10 cups at a time in its 1.25L glass carafe.

Buckingham Stainless Steel Coffee Maker, £54.99, russellhobbs.com

The travel mug machine

Coffee Machine Travel Mug Brew & Go Russell Hobbs
(Picture: Russell Hobbs)

This one is great for someone who commutes in with coffee at the ready – and doesn’t need a whole pot made all the time.

It comes with a nifty 400ml detachable stainless steel travel mug along with a handy 24hr timer and automatic shut off.

Brew & Go, £32.99, russellhobbs.com

Woman discovers her painful new heels were actually on the wrong feet the whole time

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Woman wearing shoes on the wrong feet
Ayleigh’s outfit looked great, until you look a little closer at her feet (Picture: @ayleighmcgheex)

Many of us are used to coming home with painful feet after a night out in heels.

So when Ayleigh McGhee, from Glasgow, Scotland, noticed her shoes were making her feet ache, she thought it was just because they were new.

But the next day, a picture taken by her friend showed that she’d actually spent all night wearing the shoes on the wrong feet.

Her friend Georgia spotted the mistake the next day after looking through the pictures from the night out.

Ayliegh had posted one in a black dress with matching bag and the strappy high heels.

But taking a closer look, they noticed both her feet spilling over the edge.

Posting the picture on Twitter, Georgia said: ‘Ayleigh was actual moaning the full night saying she couldn’t walk in her shoes.

‘And [she] only just realised this morning she was wearing them on the wrong feet

‘This lassie man.’

People on Twitter loved the picture and it quickly went viral with 33,500 likes and 1,900 retweets.

But Chlo Marshall told the women that even when she wore the shoes on the right feet, they hurt a lot.

She said: ‘I had these shoes and they KILLED. My feet were awful.’

Others shared their own fashion mishaps, including one who tagged a friend who wore her dress back to front.

Mary tweeted that she accidentally wore her bikini back to front and she didn’t notice until her husband took a picture.

Beth said that despite the mishap, Ayleigh still looked great. She posted: ‘Shoes look peng tho, need some of those beauties in my life ( but on the right feet obvs lol).’

MORE: Bake Off 2019: How to make a spiced winter cheesecake for dairy week

MORE: Poundland launches new cocktail inspired scented candles for £1 each

Why do some people become racist when they’re drunk?

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llustration of woman drinking
Why do so many racist incidents involve alcohol? (Mmuffin for Metro.co.uk)

‘I knew you were from somewhere in Asia. A P*ki maybe,’ a guest at a family barbeque tells me. He’s drunk. I leave promptly.

This isn’t an isolated incident. Racism seems part and parcel of a night out, a football match, or on public transport. It lurks everywhere alcohol is consumed.

Lad culture of football is a testament of the racism that goes hand in hand with overdrinking. Romelu Lukaku is just one of the recent footballers who faced racist chants against him at a match.

But it’s unlikely to be the last as some fans reveal their racial biases while emboldened by alcohol.

Researchers from Cardiff University found that people become more racist and homophobic when they’ve been drinking. They say alcohol acts as an ‘igniter’ to people expressing their prejudices in the form of violent hate crime.

Along with crimes against minorities, drunken racism also comes in the form of throwaway comments, slurs, racial stereotyping and ‘jokes’.

And in some cases, the people to whom it’s directed at have no choice but to laugh it off, ignore it or engage with them.

Jack, a student from Indonesia, experienced this while drinking at a Wetherspoons.

He explained to Metro.co.uk: ‘Two white men who’d had a few were drinking a Chinese beer and bent over to me to ask whether I knew what the characters on the drink were.

‘I don’t know Chinese (I’m Indonesian) but they kept pressing saying surely I must know. Luckily my friend actually did some Chinese so he took the heat off and diffused the situation.’

Jack felt grateful that a friend had been there to address the two men’s inaccurate assumptions in a non-aggressive way, feeling that confrontation was out of the question.

Image of a pint on a blue background
Drunk racial slurs don’t seem to have the same repercussions as sober ones (Picture: Getty)

We spoke with a closed Facebook group dedicated to matters of race about the issue and the general consensus is that alcohol is not to be blamed.

Members feel that the condemnation ought to be reserved for the people who exhibit inherently racist beliefs.

One person tells Metro.co.uk: ‘Drinking doesn’t turn people into racists. Not only is that factually incorrect, but it also trivialises the structural basis of racism. Plenty of people get drunk without turning into racists.’

Another echoed the sentiment: ‘Drinking is not the culprit of racism, it may lower inhibitions and mean overt racism is more likely to come out but those people were always racist in the first place’.

Can you separate the speaker from their drunken sentiments? If something (a bad belief for example) isn’t already inside a person, where does it come from when they’re intoxicated?

First, it’s important to understand what happens to the brain when you drink.

GP Clinical Lead Dr Daniel Atkinson at treated.com explains that alcohol impairs judgment, decision-making and causes slower reflexes.

This results in poor concentration, memory lapses and disinhibited behaviour.

He tells Metro.co.uk: ‘When alcohol reaches the brain it will change, inhibit or reduce function to the individual regions which are all responsible for different things. Both psychological and physical.

‘It will impact specific regions of the brain which are responsible for varying functions and this will bring about a diminished sense of reason, emotions and inhibitions.

‘Depending on the severity, it’s possible that this may cause some people to “forget” their usual morals – some of which they’ve been taught their entire lives.

‘Of course, this does not excuse nor legitimise mindless or aggressive behaviour.’

Clearly, there’s a societal cost of drinking –  slip-ups can be offensive, can occur in embarrassment, and even job loss, but it’s not to say that everyone should stop drinking or that anyone who suspects they may inhabit closet prejudiced beliefs should have an alcohol cap.

So what can be done?

Lecturer in sociology at Middlesex University Rima Sani says the key is breaking down racist thoughts, not simply ditching alcohol.

She explains to Metro.co.uk that those with deep-seated prejudices will be ‘exposed’, one way or another and that the only way to counteract that is to actively address your prejudices.

She says: ‘To become anti-racist is to realise the subtle, less subtle and institutional prejudices which you contribute to, either knowingly or unknowingly and being committed to change.

‘It’s not enough to claim to not be a racist because whether over the dinner table or on a drunken night out, your deep-seated prejudices will be exposed.

‘Whether you think you’re making a casual and inoffensive joke, whether you’re inebriated, or whether you think you’re just articulating what everyone else is thinking are not good enough reasons.’

She adds that it’s not just an individual but a group and societal level of change that’s needed.

And one societal change required is recognising where unconscious bias creeps up.

She adds: ‘Most people who exhibit casual racisms, engage in “unconscious” bias and harbour prejudices about certain ethnicities tend to deny that they are racist – “I have lots of black friends” for example.

‘But becoming a positive force for anti-racism and social justice requires conscious effort- a level of acknowledgement of the prevalence and insidiousness of racism and a commitment to change.’

Some might say that your drunk self isn’t your true self.

Researcher at Kagoshima University in Japan Amina Moss asks whether we can be considered ourselves when alcohol works to strip away the parts that make us who we are – or who we think we are.

‘Alcohol affects the frontal lobe by depressing the person’s reasoning and judgement,’ she writes in a blog.

‘By depressing or diminishing reason and judgement, it removes many of the morals that people were taught for years.

‘Alcohol tends to remove a certain wall and throws political correctness out of the window. But it’s hard to judge a person based on how they act when they’re drunk, because of the scientific proof that they’re essentially not themselves if we remove all the good stuff, like good judgement, proper reasoning, morals and values.’

In essence, the values and morals that shape a person are compromised and they’re left with someone that doesn’t care about the consequences.

Which begs the question, is that truly them?

After all, anyone with Tourette Syndrome may have involuntary tics where they swear or use offensive language that they may internalise from different mediums.

Someone with Tourettes may say something that they absolutely don’t believe – their tics aren’t their genuine values but aren’t under their control.

Could it be said that some drinkers subconsciously absorb problematic language and let it slip once their internal control centres come down?

But the opposite argument would be that Tourette’s is a compulsion, racism is a choice. That is according to a Facebook user who tells us drinking is a mere medium reflecting someone’s internal thoughts.

They explained to Metro.co.uk: ‘The very vast majority of people who have been racist towards me were stone-cold sober.

‘Drinking doesn’t make you racist, or sexist, or a predator, or an a*shole. People like to use drinking as an excuse for their sh*tty behaviour because that absolves them from actually examining themselves or having any personal responsibility.’

On another Facebook group dedicated to learning anti-racism, of which many members are white, I put out a call asking whether anyone had made a problematic comment while drunk in the past or even laughed at one.

Understandably, no one came forward which makes sense as no one wants to be associated with past (or present) misdoings.

Cancel culture of the 21st century doesn’t help where people are (sometimes rightfully) quickly vilified for previous mishaps (i.e old tweets).

To those who racism happens to, an apology might be desired, though that might not heal the relationship.

This sort of apology needed is a prompt one, with transgressors understanding the weight of the slur/s and an active commitment to learn and unlearn attitudes that enable hateful speech.

I’m not sure if the drunk man from the barbecue realised his mistake the next day. And as a non-drinker, I can’t claim to understand his mindset.

But what I, like the many people to whom this has happened, would like is an apology and then for it to never happen again.

And in an ideal world, such offenders would educate themselves to chip away any problematic inclinations before it spills out when drunk.

Because let’s be honest, the only bad things to come out of someone’s mouth when drunk is probably chunder.

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KFC releases a fried chicken and doughnut sandwich

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The new KFC chicken and doughnut sandwich
The new chicken and doughnut sandwich (Picture: KFC)

Fried chicken is good. Doughnuts are good. But does that mean we should have both at the same time?

Whether you’re behind the combination or not, KFC is doing it.

Yes, the fast-food chain is trialling a new sandwich made up of a crispy chicken fillet, seasoned with the secret blend of herbs and spices of course, sandwiched between two sweet glazed doughnuts.

Right now it’s only available in a select few restaurants in the U.S. but if it goes well, it could be served nationwide.

We can only hope that some day, it’ll even be available here in the UK so we can try it.

KFC chicken and doughnut sandwich
Sadly it’s not available in the UK just yet (Picture: KFC)

Apparently, the final recipes are still being tested so KFC hasn’t released the nutritional information yet but this dish sounds like it might be one to keep as an occasional treat.

The chicken and doughnuts sandwich is available for $7.50 (£6.01) or you can have the basket option – chicken on the bone or tenders with one doughnut $5.50 (£4.41).

You can also add an additional doughnut to any order for $1 (£80).

Although the doughnut burger isn’t coming to our shores just yet, the chain is shaking things up with some new things on the menu this year.

In June, there was a four-week trial for the vegan imposter burger.

And earlier this month, they brought back the inferno bites in three flavours – piri piri, firey buffalo and sweet chilli.

The bites cost £1.99 for four but they are limited edition so if you want to try them, there are only a few weeks left.

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Mixed Up: ‘Being mixed-race is like being a fly on the wall – it’s crazy what people feel comfortable saying’

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Rob Law’s father is from Trinidad and Tobago, his mum is white British – but there are more layers to his heritage.

‘My father’s father is half Spanish, from Venezuela,’ explains Rob, ‘Although I mainly tend to just keep it simple and tell people that I am half black and half white. Which technically, I am.’

Rob’s dad came to the UK during the Windrush era. He landed in Liverpool where he met Rob’s mum and opened his own business. Something that Rob is enduringly proud of.

‘Dad’s business was selling women’s clothing and jewellery – which was quiet astounding for someone to do who was from the Caribbean and had only recently arrived in the country at that time.

‘But he managed to make an impression and he became very known by the local people, as well as those from his own community.

(Picture by Jerry Syder for Metro.co.uk) Mixed Up, Natalie Morris
‘Having a mixed-race grandson was a learning curve for my grandparents.’ (Picture by Jerry Syder for Metro.co.uk)

‘My mother worked in the hospital, and went on to work in an administrative role for a local law firm. Later in life she went on to become a solicitor.’

Rob is proud of his history and of his mixed heritage, particularly when he thinks about the trials his family had to overcome in the early years.

When Rob’s mum found herself unmarried and pregnant with the child of a Caribbean immigrant, she decided to leave the city where she had always lived. She felt she had no choice but to start afresh because of the disapproval of her family.

‘The fact that she wasn’t married and was having a baby outside of her own race – it was seen as a sin. She came from a very narrow-minded, working class background, and she knew that what she was doing would be frowned upon.

‘When she did eventually give birth to me, she told my grandparents. They let down their guard and insisted she come back so they would have the chance to play a part in my upbringing.

‘Having a mixed-race grandson was a learning curve for my grandparents, and it opened up their minds and slightly changed their attitudes.

‘They have been great ever since, and they played a really positive role in my upbringing.

Baby Rob
‘All we were taught of black history in schools was that black people where slaves.’ (Picture: Rob Law)

‘My grandfather and I have had some heated and interesting debates as I have got older and began to understand the world more. But we respect one another.

‘At times have agreed to disagree on certain issues, but it has never been anything too serious.’

Rob’s ideas about self-identity have been largely influenced by his schooling and education. He says not being taught adequately about black history has lead him to seek this information out himself, and therefore identify more strongly with this part of who he is.

‘All we were taught of black history in schools was that black people were slaves – that would pretty much be it,’ says Rob. ‘I would feel so awkward and uncomfortable because it made me believe that was the only history black people had.

‘I started to do my own research and met friends who taught me about my black heritage, and suggested books I should read and things I should research.

‘Even being brought up most of my life by my white family, in terms of history, black history resonates with me the most.’

Rob Law as a toddler
‘Having a racially ambiguous look when I am at an airport, for example, I do get treated more harshly than others.’ (Picture: Rob Law)

Rob has experienced open and covert racism countless times in his life – but he says that looking racially ‘ambiguous’ adds a different dynamic to how he is perceived in those situations.

‘I do know that I experience racism different to other members of my family due to how I look,’ he explains.

‘Having a racially ambiguous look when I am at an airport, for example, I do get treated more harshly than others as security tend to think I am perhaps Egyptian or from Morocco.

‘They make the racist presumption that all people from these places are part of a terrorist organisation. I know they seem to think I am from these places as they have actually asked me if I am. I often get an extra pat down and angry look.’

Rob knows what it’s like to be ‘othered’ by both white and black people. Although he can now look at those incidents in isolation and doesn’t believe it is something that is symptomatic of being mixed-race, but rather the individual prejudices of a minority.

‘I have had ignorance from both black and white people due to how I look, act and sound,’ he explains. ‘While I was growing up, to some white people I was just another ethnic minority and worthless. This was how some people thought in Liverpool at that time.

‘Then, when I moved to Bath, which is also multicultural like London, I was not considered black enough by the kids in the area. Due to the way l looked and sounded at the time.

‘I soon learned that those particular white people and those particular black people where embracing a stereotype of themselves. And this did not reflect the wider society of black and white people in the country.’

One thing Rob does note though is how being mixed-race exposes you to conversations that you may have never been aware of if you weren’t able to operate in this in-between space. And that can be uncomfortable.

‘We are privy to in-depth conversations discussing the most outlandish things about people of other races,’ says Rob. ‘From both sides – it’s incredible how some people seem to feel so comfortable saying these things.

‘Being mixed-race and listening to some white people’s or some black people’s thoughts, is like being a fly on the wall.’

Rob attributes his openness as a person to his exposure to multiple cultures, but also to the personalities of his parents and what he learned from their behaviour.

‘I love the fact that I am part of two different races,’ says Rob. ‘My mother’s support throughout my life has helped me to see the world differently.

Rob with his mum
‘My mother’s support throughout my life has helped me to see the world differently.’ (Picture: Rob Law)

‘When my mum met my dad, she was drawn to him because of who he was as a person. His persona and the way he conducts himself. She had never previously dated outside of her race, but she was open to learn from people from all backgrounds.

‘She has always been very open-minded and has always had an interest in different cultures which was rare for someone from the neighbourhood in Liverpool where she grew up.

‘Being mixed-race does not add anything particular to my life, although I feel comfortable in predominantly white and black spaces. Which I would like to think any person would, regardless of race.’

Mixed Up

Being mixed-race is so much more than just black and white (Pictures: Jerry Syder)

Mixed Up is our weekly series that gets to the heart of what it means to be mixed-race in the UK today.

Going beyond discussions of divided identity, this series takes a look at the unique joys, privileges and complexities that come with being mixed-race - across of variety of different contexts.

The mixed-race population is the UK's fastest-growing ethnic group, and yet there is still so much more to understand about the varied lived experiences of individuals within this hugely heterogenous group.

Each week we speak to the people who know exactly how it feels to navigate this inbetween space.

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Woman outraged by fiancé’s ‘chocolate safe’ in the fridge locking away his snacks

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METRO GRAB - Stacey Lowe Facebook no permission Dad buys a safe for the fridge to store his fave snacks https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=2417719378513092&set=pcb.2417719438513086&type=3&theater Picture: Stacey Lowe
The fridge lockbox (Picture: Stacey Lowe/Facebook)

Picture the scene. You’ve had a long day at work. All you want to do is go home, nestle up on the couch, put on some Netflix and bite into that snack you’ve been thinking about all day.

But to your horror, when you get home, you realise someone’s nicked it.

Such is the consequence of living with Bad People (siblings, we’re looking at you).

But one man went to extreme lengths to stop his fiancée and child from eating his treats.

The dad decided to purchase a mini-safe to be kept in the fridge. And to add to the burn, he opted for a transparent one so the family could see what they’re missing out on.

Naturally, his partner, Stacey Lowe, was not impressed.

She took to Facebook to post images of his safe, complete with Oreo Dairy Milk, Double Deckers and other sweet bits.

The post racked up more than 48,000 likes and over 105,000 comments. Clearly, other people can relate.

So this is what it has come too! You buy a house together, have a child together, get engaged, are planning a wedding…

Geplaatst door Stacey Lowe op Donderdag 12 september 2019

She wrote: ‘So this is what it has come too! You buy a house together, have a child together, get engaged, are planning a wedding and doing your house up and this happens!

‘Dave goes and buys a f*cking fridge safe because he’s an a*sehole and doesn’t want to share his chocolate with me anymore! Does anyone want him? Surely this is breakup material, right?! Prick!’

Many, many comments on the post said they need one of these safes.

Others said it just means Stacey has to work for her treats but should be able to get to them (by breaking it, cracking the code, or asking her fiancée for it).

‘This was built for me,’ chimed one while another said: ‘I need one of these for my cubby hole stash.’

Some of the pettier members of Facebook had advice for Stacey:  ‘I would pull that lockbox out and put it on the radiator for all to melt then put back in for when he gets home.’

And one person asked: ‘What monster puts chocolate in the fridge though?’

One person argued that it won’t be hard to decipher the code: ‘Three- number combination shouldn’t be too hard to crack highest number 999, may as well start from 001 good luck I hope you pass this test.’

We’re not sure about the maths on that one but good luck to Stacey.

For those itching to pull the same move, you can purchase the lockbox from Amazon for £29.95.

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Reebok launches maternity fitness range that grows with your bump

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Pregnant women wearing the new Reebok maternity range
The material is designed to adapt and stretch as you grow (Picture: Reebok)

Reebok has launched a brand new Maternity Collection so expectant mothers can continue to workout comfortably throughout pregnancy.

The collection provides supportive, flattering fits that are technically designed to flex and grow with your body – so you don’t have to buy new gear as your bump gets bigger.

The range is both versatile and seamless for added comfort, which is great news if you want to keep working out even into the later stages of your pregnancy.

A study this week revealed that ‘vigorous’ exercise is both safe and healthy for women even into the third trimester of their pregnancy – which means you’re going to need kit that fits your body as you grow.

Pregnant women wearing the new Reebok maternity range
It looks so comfy (Picture: Reebok)
Pregnant women wearing the new Reebok maternity range
The collection includes tights and a tank top (Picture: Reebok)

Reebok’s range includes the Lux Maternity Tight, made with an extended waistband and soft nylon spandex material, and the Seamless Maternity Tank.

Available in 2XS-XL sizing, you can currently choose between black, heritage navy and rose dust.

The debut collection uses premium high-stretch fabrics that support and enable mothers through each trimester. It has been engineered to support women in any activity, whether they’re in the gym or just popping to the shops.

So if you live in activewear, that doesn’t have to stop when you’re pregnant.

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Instagram star creates incredible high fashion pics – and they’re shot in her bedroom

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Photoshoot of Kimberly on a bed 'in the ocean' which is actually a mattress on a roof edited to look like water
One of the rare outside shots by Kimberly who mostly creates the looks in her room (Picture: Kimberly Douglas)

Gosh, it’s hard keeping up with Insta-worthy shots, isn’t it? You need a flower wall, the right lighting and a cute outfit.

One woman who manages to get them oh so right has shown that while you do need to put in some effort, you don’t need lots of material.

Kimberly Douglas who goes by Kihmberlie on her Instagram account has an incredible sense of fashion.

The influencer, from California, has nailed every high fashion posts which include technicolour backgrounds, dizzying heights, and just lots of extra photoshoots.

But she’s transparent with all her 85,000 followers, showing them just how she put the whole thing together at home (and occasionally away).

Kimberly is the set and costume designer, photographer and model for all her shoots, which means you can do it too.

All you need to do is head to your local thrift store and pick all the cute things. Slide to see more of her creations.

Kimberly told Metro.co.uk how she started sharing the background shots because no one else was doing it.

She explained: ‘I wanted to show people that you can still create something dope even if you don’t have a huge budget or expensive equipment and I also thought it was pretty cool.

‘My shoots take at the least eight hours from start to finish. I usually just find things around my house or use what I already have for the majority of my shoots.

‘If I do spend money it’s never more than around $40 (£32) except for rare occasions, out of all of the shoots I’ve done so far this year only one has cost more than $100 (£80).’

Though her own Insta has popped off, she added that she doesn’t have the secret to making other people’s accounts pop off (but maybe if you go to the same lengths as her?).

She added that she started creating her own fabulous photoshoots to show her modelling versatility and potential.

‘My goal has always been to get signed with a modelling agency and work in the modelling industry,’ she said.

‘My following grew when I posted the process of one of my shoots on Twitter and kind of just kept going after that. I started all of this to gain modelling experience and it just took a life of its own.’

Here are a few more of our fave shots from Kimberly:

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