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Please, please, please never let Morrissey write another sex scene.
If you haven’t heard already, The Smiths’ former frontman has been shortlisted for Literary Review’s Bad Sex in Fiction award.
Because an erection should never be described as a ‘bulbous salutation’.
However, Morrissey hasn’t won it just yet – there’s another seven contenders in line for the dubious honour.
Each bringing their own special brand of cringeworthiness to the table.
We warn you: reading these passages is almost as bad as inadvertently watching a sex scene on telly with your parents.
Read on at your peril.
Morrissey – List of the Lost
Eliza’s breasts barrel-rolled across… Read the full story
