My late father used to say, ‘a place for everything and everything in its place,’ delivered with great irony because A) he was the messiest person I’ve known and B) totally comfortable with it.
It must be in the DNA as I am messy too. But unlike Dad it stresses me out and brings me down.
As neuroscientist Dr Tara Swart writes in her bestselling book The Source, ‘our physical environment plays a major part in maintaining our mood, perspective and stress levels… a space to recover from stresses and worries.’ However. My home is making me stressed and worried.
This contrasts with my work life where I am ‘obnoxiously organised’ as a friend once complimented me, but like many of us I simply have Too Much Stuff; my wardrobe is so crammed I can’t see what clothes I have, as for the floordrobe think changing rooms on the first day of Primark’s sale.
When I try to tidy my one-bedroom London flat – of which I’m very well aware I am very lucky to have – I create more chaos and during my attempts at decluttering I get overwhelmed and throw my toys out of the proverbial pram into the ‘utility cupboard’ aka dumping ground.
It also makes for a joyless cycle as I have ADHD and there are links between this and mess – but whatever the medical evidence, I find is hard to accept that I could do with a hand. Until now…
I need help
It’s a cold and grey Monday morning and my bed is covered with every bag I possess in order of size from holdalls to evening purses.
There has not been a moment of self-enlightenment – in desperation I have called in the founders of the professional home organisation and decluttering company Ever So Organised (ESO).
Created by friends Nancy Lightfoot, a former estate agent and Susannah Kirby-Green, previously a marketing director, together they know a thing or two about presentation not to mention organisation and speak fluent storage solutions, a language that make my stomach flip with joy.
As members of the Association of Professional Declutterers & Organisers, the dynamic duo is here to spend two days decluttering, sorting out my bedroom, bathroom and sitting room which includes my chaotic utility cupboard.
Three weeks previously they visited me for a consultation from their Richmond base. ‘We always meet the client first because they have to trust us and we know we can work together,’ Susannah tells me over coffee.
‘Our USP is that we really get to know our clients and understand them, which informs us where everything should live. We know how very personal this service is, so you don’t want us rooting around your underwear if you don’t like us’. And this is before she has seen my drawers, if you will excuse the pun.
‘Our job is to not make you get rid of things, we create space and sustainable systems that enhance your home.’ This is important to me as I have thrown things away only to regret it so working together is vital.
‘It’s better if clients are with us at least some or better all of the time while we work so they can say what they want to keep, what to give to a chosen charity that we will find for you and what should go to the tip,’ Nancy adds. That’s another part of the service; they take everything with them even paperwork that needs secure shredding.
Sobbing for storage solutions
I want my flat to be the home I want to live in, but it makes me feel guilty and even grubby (to be clear, the flat is not) and I burst into tears of frustration and also relief that I’m getting professional help. ‘Everyone cries at least once because it’s an emotional transformative process and most clients call us in because they feel overwhelmed. But your home should serve and support you,’ says Nancy as she hands me kitchen roll (note to self, buy Kleenex and tissue holders).
As the pair walk around they talk about what they could do with me and my flat. Nancy and Susannah spin around with tape-measures even photographing my sitting room in 3-D to measure how my furniture can be rearranged and areas enhanced. I’m super excited – but who wouldn’t be at the mention of a present wrapping station?
Two days later I receive a very detailed and, importantly, non-judgemental email brief about creating ‘a haven to make Beatrice feel more at home by creating sustainable and maintain systems that she can manage herself to support and enhance her life.’ I love the sound of this, especially as. ESO provide a short shopping list from slimline coat hangers to storage solutions that they have measured for.
Bag Lady
Back to the bed of bags and three weeks after their initial visit, Nancy and Susannah are hard at the bedroom edit which is why I find myself discovering I have 62 bags. 62! Who needs that many? Look, if SJP has a thing about shoes, I have it about bags. We whittle them down to 40 as those 22 I rarely use if at all. 40 seems reasonable to me – everyone has their ‘thing’.
Stats show that on average we wear less than 30% of our clothes and they have bought a clothes rail with them and hang up every item which means I can really assess what I have.
However having asked for it all my clothes to be clean down to pants and socks, naturally my disloyal washing machine conks out the evening before so I’m hotfooting it to the laundrette a couple of times and actually it’s good to have the break it’s quite emotional; every item of clothing has a story behind it if you think about when, where and the circumstances you purchased it.
The piles I have to make are: keep, charity, recycle and for the dump – and also have a think. They don’t want me to regret throwing things out and will keep the bags for a day at one of their homes in case I realise I have made a mistake. I don’t.
Cleaning the dusty wardrobe as they go, I’m encouraged to try on clothes that are question marks, re-discover some new/old best-friends, such as a pink poncho bought 20 years ago, while there is a lot for charity. Some Theory bootcut trousers which went out of favour but are coming back (on me at least) so I hang onto them while my Lockdown jeans and sweatshirts don’t have happy memories and are knackered anyway. A couple of things I will eBay, though Nancy makes a salient point to be mindful of how much time it will take for what profit.
Heavenly narrow hangers
Clothes are then divided up and there is room to for everything that can be hanged – trousers, t-shirts, jackets etc – go on slimline wooden hangers that, believe me, will change your life. I didn’t even know they existed and I’m now ‘hooked’ on The Hanger Store and I order 100 (£114.00).
Susannah is hard at work teaching me how to fold my jumpers – she even has a clothes folding board from Amazon £8.97 – and instead of piles they are stacked horizontally so I can see what I have from above when I open the drawer. As for the grey socks and old knickers – I don’t need so many so keep the better looking items, the rest in the bin.
The label maker is hard at work labelling the drawers with what goes where, circular labels divide the clothes into sections such as short sleaved t-shirts and long sleave and in the hallway debris to be taken away is piling up.
In the open shelves, labelled elegant grey laundry boxes from Amazon (£25.98) are brilliant for things that can be hidden away such as hair electricals and also a memories box with old passports and, finally, a place for dad’s cap.
That, along with sorting my sheets stored in A Place for Everything adapted plastic freezer units because they fit the measurements and are transparent (I’ve heard of losing socks but where have my matching pillowcases gone?) has taken a day, and they haven’t stopped working. Given I’ve done 25,000 steps, I would estimate Nancy and Susannah have done double. I wave them off with a packed SUV full of my detritus.
How to do your own declutter
1. Minimise guilt about why you are in position in the first place – ti’s incredibly common and not a reflection of your capabilities.
2. Edit your possession first into for the dump, recycling and charity. For the latter think bout whether it could be more useful in someone elses home especially if you have gone three years without using or wearing it.
3. Measure the spaces and asses what you need to store – people oftenby storage solutions at the start of the process before they know what is needed to be kept and stored.
4. Start small room by room or a cupboard by cupboard approach as looking at the whole house in one go can be daunting.
5. Hire a professional organiser Association of Professional Declutterers & Organisers will help you find someone local and even if you only do one room with them, a professional \will guide you through the process and give you the tools you need. It will help with the overwhelm of getting started.
And now for the rest of the place…
Tuesday at 8am and it’s time to sort the rest of the flat. Nancy is ‘dressing’ my sitting room using her estate agent skills to move furniture and removed some items into the bedroom plus used some throws over the grotty sofa cushions.
Meanwhile, Susannah and I clear my desk and create spaces so I can actually find my work essentials and get rid of a load of paperwork which on my own was too overwhelming to go through. Oh the relief of getting rid of it all; with Susannah questioning if I need this or that I can be decisive rather than distracted.
Much is thrown out of the utility cupboard in the sitting room and the present wrapping station – something I’ve always coveted, and not just for Christmas – looks like a two-sided hanging garment bag with all sorts of clever storage for ribbons.
In the bathroom the cleaning materials are cleaned out and for my beauty products, just as in my bedroom, plastic containers mean that I can find anything quickly (I also throw away a lot of out-of-date products) and shelves lined. My bathroom, as they say in women’s magazines ‘should feel like a sanctuary’ and now it does.
By 6pm we’re done and I offer Nancy and Susannah a much needed glass of wine – they have worked so hard and I am not only grateful and delighted but I feel like I have lost ten pounds and they tell me my shoulders have physically dropped.
When they leave, I can’t stop smiling as I walk around seeing the transformation.
I feel confident I can keep up all their hard work too, as they have turned my illogical management into logic and I know where to put things, it all makes sense for once – plus, I know the team offer a free follow up hour when you need it.
Has it worked?
Two months on, I am happy to report that I am still managing to keep it up – although, admittedly, I still have to push myself, but I do feel much better when I do.
I also find it hard to believe that Nancy and Susannah have changed my life in two days, removing so much emotional backage as well transforming my flat from home sad mess to home sweet home and a much happier me.
Yet it’s not cheap with the two days around £2,000 but it’s as good as having my flat redecorated.
My concentration has become more focused not distracted by the thought of the washing that needs folding, I do it right away plus I’ve rediscovered clothes I had forgotten about. Ever So Organised have given me the best start to 2025. Any regrets? Simply not doing it before.
Ever So Organised charge £120 per hour with both Nancy and Susannah decluttering with a minimum of four hours and a free follow up hour three to six months later. Additionally, £40 per trip to dispose of items to the dump, recycling and charity. For more information click here.
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