Articles on this Page
- 10/31/17--06:58: _‘Distracted Boyfrie...
- 10/31/17--07:00: _20 adorable cockapo...
- 10/31/17--07:00: _Seasonal Affective ...
- 10/31/17--07:07: _Five-year-old accid...
- 10/31/17--07:45: _What it’s like to s...
- 10/31/17--08:00: _10 simple things to...
- 10/31/17--08:00: _10 things that will...
- 10/31/17--08:12: _People who say that...
- 10/31/17--08:12: _London has got its ...
- 10/31/17--08:13: _Rexie the three-yea...
- 10/31/17--08:33: _If you’re a man and...
- 10/31/17--08:34: _Why do women look h...
- 10/31/17--08:40: _Forget your Pennywi...
- 10/31/17--08:50: _Guys, please stop t...
- 10/31/17--09:00: _The 9 best UK outdo...
- 10/31/17--09:02: _Spooky beers perfec...
- 10/31/17--09:20: _I tried to have sex...
- 10/31/17--10:24: _This stunning Maldi...
- 10/31/17--10:31: _Boots said that the...
- 10/31/17--10:44: _12 things you shoul...
- 10/31/17--07:00: 20 adorable cockapoos to brighten your day
- 10/31/17--07:00: Seasonal Affective Disorder – why winter makes me SAD
- 10/31/17--07:45: What it’s like to stick your penis in the Tenga Flip Zero guybrator
- 10/31/17--08:00: 10 simple things to improve your life if you have schizophrenia
- 10/31/17--08:12: People who say that they’re ‘just being honest’ are a**holes
- 10/31/17--08:12: London has got its first ever bridal department store
- 10/31/17--08:34: Why do women look hotter after they’ve been cheated on?
- 10/31/17--09:00: The 9 best UK outdoor ice skating rinks to visit this winter
- 10/31/17--09:02: Spooky beers perfect for Halloween and Day Of The Dead
- 10/31/17--09:20: I tried to have sex with a ghost because it’s Halloween
Nothing says 2017 quite like dressing up as an internet meme for Halloween.
You want people to know that you’re in the know.
Nothing on LadBible passes you by.
You basically are the internet.
And when it comes to memes, there’s only one that everyone wants to be this year: the Distracted Boyfriend.
It’s not offensive. It doesn’t require any particular outfit. You don’t need any time consuming makeup.
All you have to have is two other people willing to hang around with you, one with his eyes locked in permanent side-eye, and the other in a state of shocked upset.
It all started with Chase Mitchell, who uploaded a picture from his Halloween bash:
Screen Shot 2017-10-31 at 12.55.20mkyl
Sure, sure, all dogs are cute, especially when they’re puppies.19 reasons cockapoos are the best dog breed
But cockapoos are in a league of their own.
They’re the most popular hybrid dog breed in the UK, they’re clever, affectionate, the perfect size, and they don’t shed fur.
Plus, they’re bloomin’ adorable, with their shaggy coats and funny little moustaches.
Here are some cockapoos loving life to brighten up your day – and to convince any cockapoo-sceptics that they are truly magical creatures.
This lil’ fella just wants to be involved.
I can confirm, they are indeed cheeky.
Close up of nose of a mixed breed, snoozing puppyabbychandler
I first started suffering from Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) when I moved to Edinburgh for university when I was 19.
Until that point, I had been living on the east coast of America where although the winters are harsh, there are still plenty of really bright days.Winter is coming: A flash guide to preparing for seasonal affective disorder
Scotland, however, was a different matter altogether. And in the winter, sometimes it hardly ever gets light. Even on a good day, it could be pitch black by about 3pm.
My GP at the time suggested, rather helpfully, that… Read the full story
METRO ILLUSTRATIONS - Why winter makes me SADyvettemcasterWhy winter makes me SADmetro illustrations
A young mother was left with a massive Amazon bill after her five-year-old daughter accidentally ordered a diamond necklace and nearly £300 worth of the same Disney toy.
32-year-old Sophie Stone was baffled when a delivery she had no recollection of ordering arrived at her Southampton home this month.
But it didn’t take long for the mystery to be solved – as her excited daughter Bella blurted out: ‘My necklace has arrived’.
‘When the postman first showed up, I was so confused,’ said Sophie, a stay-at-home mum to Bella and her siblings Ellie, eight and Oliver, two.
‘I was trying to remember what I’d ordered, then began wondering if my husband, Dan, had… Read the full story
Mum slapped with a huge Amazon bill after her five-year-old daughter accidentally ordered goodies including a DIAMOND necklacehattiegladwellmetro
When the prospect of a ‘guyvibrator’ was first offered up, I immediately had one important question: ‘Where do you expect me to put that?’
Thankfully, the answer was that it did not need to go up anywhere, you simply put something in it, so I remained open to continuing the conversation.
Another thought I had when the ‘guyvibrator’ was brought up: Why hadn’t I considered buying a wanking device before?
As a man in his late twenties, an awful lot of masturbation has happened in my life. Just a quick bit of rough mathematics suggests I have probably knocked one out not just hundreds, but thousands of times.
A conservative estimate is 100… Read the full story
No-one said schizophrenia was going to be easy, but sometimes it can feel like I’m the protagonist in a conspiracy film or psychological thriller.
But I don’t buy into the myth that schizophrenia is a life-sentence, or that I can’t get better and live a full and meaningful life.Things every psychiatrist wants their patient to know
My first hurdle has been to accept the illness and its difficulties, though challenges for me and loved ones are ever present.
Friends and family can be really supportive, as… Read the full story
philosophercromptonericawoman with a lot of thoughtsmetro illustrations
I’m well aware that only 8% of people with schizophrenia, like me, are in employment and this includes in voluntary positions.
I find this a shame as work can improve your finances, give you a sense of self-worth and belonging, and be the key to making new friends.Things every psychiatrist wants their patient to know
Analysts have established that £8.4 billion each year is lost by businesses due to mental illness, and another £15.1 billion is lost in reduced productivity according to Acas. A further £2.4… Read the full story
Pitfalls of Freelancecromptonericametro illustrations
You always get at least one idiot on Come Dine With Me who warns everyone in the intro that they’re known for ‘telling it as it is’.
They’re not going to be backwards in coming forwards when it comes to feed back.
No, they’re going to be brutally honest.
This means than when Kevin off of the Wirral doesn’t make his own ice cream, this honest prat is going to make a big song and dance of it. When Katie from Plymouth puts too little salt in her mash, this doofus will refuse to eat it. And when they eventually get challenged on their night, they’ll tell the camera that everyone else is… Read the full story
When I was organizing my wedding, more than once I found myself wishing there was just one shop that you could go to and pick everything in one go.
Sadly, this time last year it wasn’t an option, so I couldn’t do that.
But if you’re planning a wedding, you can. Because now, London has a bridal department store.
The Wedding Gallery_Event Suppliers_3rebeccacnreid
Rexie the cat has stolen our hearts and he can keep them forever.
Seriously, 3-year-old Rexie is possibly one of the most adorable felines we’ve seen. He’s also quite the celebrity, with over 80,000 followers on his Instagram alone.
Fans are in love with Rexie because he’s ‘very expressive when it comes to showing emotions,’ according to his owner, Dasha.
In most of his photos, Rexie likes to stick out his tongue while waiting for Dasha to take his picture.
‘It’s important to catch the right… Read the full story
Disabled cat loves to stick out his tonguehattiegladwellmetro
I was filling up the car with petrol and watching as the ticker whizzed around.
After a good few moments the nozzle clunked full and off I went inside to depart with my hard-earned cash.
‘That’ll be fifty-five quid my darling.’
The guy was the same age as me and friendly enough but the last word jarred. I’d never met the guy before, why call me darling?
I handed over the cash, gritting my teeth.
Oh Jesus. This fella was really testing my patience – but off I went without a word.
I probably would have smiled politely had he not said it, so the worst he got was a blank… Read the full story
We’ve all heard of the cliché after a breakup: boy goes on holiday with the lads, girl cuts their hair for a dramatic makeover.
That makeover is standard regardless of the circumstances of the breakup. But when cheating’s involved, the physical reinvention seems to ramp up a notch.
Celebrities aren’t exempt – Jeremy Meeks’ ex-wife reportedly underwent cosmetic procedures including eyelash extensions, eyebrow microblading, cryotherapy, and vagina tightening.
She’s certainly not the first or last woman (or man) to undergo a dramatic physical transformation after being cheated on.
If you’ve been cheated on, posting lots of sexy selfies on Instagram/Snapchat (insert as appropriate) is as de rigeur… Read the full story
Why it's okay to put your happiness firstlaylahaidrani25metro illustrationsmetro illustrations
If you’re still busy attending halloween events but don’t have enough money for a new costume for every one – why not go cheap and cheerful like this girl, who created an amazing take on Disney’s The Little Mermaid using plastic bags.
20-year-old Lara Campbell, from Uddingston, ditched seashells and a green tail for a bralette and mermaid tail made entirely of Lidl plastic bags.
Ladies and gentlemen, we present to you: The Lidl Mermaid.
We know, it’s a masterpiece. And you can pretty much give up on your dreams of your Halloween costume winning a trophy, because Lara’s already won in our books.
Lara tells Metro.co.uk that her costume was inspired by… Read the full story
Guys, telling your girlfriend she looks great when she doesn’t isn’t cool.
Some men do it because they genuinely can’t tell that gold and grey just don’t go. Others do it because they don’t want to hang around when their partner asks for an extra five minutes.
I’ll forgive you for the former, but if you’re lying about how your girlfriend looks because you’re worrying about missing your taxi, you need to stop.
Telling your girlfriend she looks great when she doesn’t is actually pretty selfish.
I’m not talking about making comments on her weight, or her body. Nor am I saying you have the right to force your girlfriend… Read the full story
***ILLUSTRATION REQUEST*** How I broke the golden rule of sex work and fell in love with a client (Miranda Kane)hattiegladwellmetro
Get your skates on because the outdoor ice rinks are opening around the country.
Ice skating has to be one of the best winter activities for all ages, and each year the rinks are built in towns and cities across the country especially for the winter season.Why a mini break to Cornwall is a perfect his and hers winter weekend escape
And this year, some rinks are already open.
From historic settings such as the Tower of London to a modern winter wonderland, take your pick… Read the full story
Londonmadmumof3boysSkaters on ice rink at Somerset House. (Picture: Loop Images/UIG via Getty Images)People ice skating at London's open-air ice rink at the Tower of London. The ice rink is set against the magnificent fortress battlements, providing a stunning setting for winter skating in the City. (Photo by In Pictures Ltd./Corbis via Getty Images)A dramatic dusk view of the ice rink at Somerset House. Since opening in 2000 it has been acknowledged around the world as a premier winter attraction in London. Over a quarter of a million visitors each year now enjoy skating, or being spectators with the backdrop of this beautifully lit and atmospheric eighteenth century courtyard. (Photo by Gideon Mendel/In Pictures/Corbis via Getty Images)Choristers from Winchester Cathedral don ice-skates to enjoy the artificial rink set up beside the cathedral (Photo by Matt Cardy/Getty Images)People skating on the St Andrews Square Ice Rink during Light Night and the event that celebrates the inauguration of Christmas Time in Edinburgh at George Street (Photo by Roberto Ricciuti/Getty Images)
It’s time to forget the pumpkin spiced lattes, the toffee apples and the cupcakes shaped like eyeballs, it’s time to get own to the serious business of the beer we should be drinking during the spookiest dates on the calendar.Forget your Pennywise costume, this girl's 'Lidl Mermaid' has won Halloween hands down
With both Halloween and the Mexican Day Of The Dead this week, it’s exactly the right occasion to drink some appropriately scary, creepy and freaky-looking beers to celebrate.
Some ales, lagers, stouts and porters look pretty Halloween-appropriate all year round, whilst others are… Read the full story
Cheers for the best party ever. Debica, Polandphilhaigh26
‘I’ve got to do some work tonight’ my husband announced when I got home last night. ‘Just looking over some papers for tomorrow.’
‘Me too’ I replied. ‘I need to have sex with a ghost.’
So, he settled down in the living room (after a brief conversation about how weird my job is) and I took the bedroom.
‘If you hear any screaming’ I called through the wall to my husband. ‘Can you come and save me?’
‘How do I know you’re not having fun?’ he asked.
‘Will you please take this more seriously?’ I replied. ‘This is my JOB. It’s for my CAREER.’
ghosted-on-redditrebeccacnreidghost.jpgMETRO GRAPHICSMETRO GRAPHICS
For anybody who’s never been, the Maldives is a total bucket list destination – one that many could only dream of travelling to some day.
For anyone who has been, it’s a place so beautiful you’ll want to pack up, move and never look back. I fit right into the latter.Route 66 – Illinois to Missouri: Where to eat, what to see and what to do
I travelled to the Maldives just recently, for a five day trip.
I stayed at Grand Park Kodhipparu, a luxury resort full of villas, which is located on the North Male Atoll.
While the experience was amazing, travelling to the beautiful destination was quite tiring.
Grand Park Kodhipparu 6hattiegladwellmetro
Earlier this year BPAS, the charity who well and truly have your back on all things contraceptive, asked a question.
The question was why women in the UK were paying extortionate amounts for the morning after pill.
After quite a lot to-ing and fro-ing, various outlets such at Superdrug committed to reducing the price of the morning after pill. But Boots, one of the country’s biggest health retailers didn’t.I tried to have sex with a ghost because it's Halloween
Morning-after pill Norlevo.rebeccacnreid
Taking care of a baby is tough.
But taking care of a new baby when he or she has kept you up all damn night is even tougher.
However, help is at hand.
Here are a few things you should not attempt at any cost if you have been up all night with a baby and three things you should:
1. Leave the house
There are people out there and they might talk to you.
2. Cook anything other than toast
In fact, sod the toast. Best play it safe and stick to raw toast aka slice of bread (lick butter to taste).
ILLUSTRATION REQUEST: Why we need to talking about the challenges of starting a family when you have a severe mental health problem (Alice Evans)emilyjaneclarkmetro illustrations