Like 6.3million others in the UK, being furloughed from my job has left me with no choice but to return home.

While I’m extremely thankful to have a place to come back to without the pressure of finding somewhere new to rent (the lease on my flat also expired) there’s no doubt that being part of a fractured family poses its own set of challenges under lockdown.

It’s hard not to feel like you’re regressing to your teenage self when you’re an independent adult moving back into your childhood bedroom. But this feels particularly true when there is no one specific ‘home’ to go to.

For years, shuttling between two houses felt like being on a permanent seesaw that drained me physically and emotionally. Christmas — a celebration that previously filled me with so much joy — became a time of anxiety where the biggest decisions no longer revolved around decorations and buying gifts, but picking a parent.

When our ‘happy home’ collapsed in 2004, I had a hard time grasping how life would change. I stopped trusting my own perceptions. Witnessing the destruction of our family unit at the age of 11 was like a different type of grief; one where I found myself mourning the loss of all those things I’d taken for granted, like family holidays, the predictability of normal life, my mum and dad in the same room.

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On the day our beloved family home – our sanctuary for eight happy years – was sold, I lay on the floor of my bedroom in protest.

It was decided we would live with my mum, although I don’t remember it being much of a discussion.

Open communication had never been a big part of our family dynamic, which is why there had been no real explanation at the time of their separation. Spotting my mum reading a book about broken marriages, I asked her if she and my dad were getting a divorce. She nodded, confirming my worst fears.

The sense of security I’d felt as a child was what had allowed me to feel safe enough to live carefree and without worry. When that was stripped away, I no longer felt equipped to deal with life’s unpredictabilities — not least the fact that a friend of the family we had welcomed into our home was the root cause of their divorce.

This violation of trust on my mum and her new partner’s behalf paved the way for anger and resentment in the years that followed, while also spurring me to assert my independence.

I found solace in escaping, first to university in Sheffield, and later to Canada once graduating. It felt good to finally be in control of my decisions, and for the first time, I didn’t feel paralysed by the relentless carousel of unhappy memories.

But seeing those around me retreat back to stable homes during the coronavirus lockdown only amplified the fact that mine was not.

I would like to say the problem was in the structure, not in the individual, but that would be a fabrication of the truth.

My mum re-marrying meant we were forced to adjust to living with the same person responsible for breaking apart our family — something which required a level of pretence I failed to sustain.

The reluctance on my part to salvage any kind of relationship with him, paired with constant reminders of my turbulent teenage years in which my actions were labelled ‘rude’ and ‘melodramatic’, meant I never felt completely comfortable at home.

So, in effort to squash any further hostility, I decided to see out the remainder of quarantine with my dad. And while it’s been generally relaxed, it hasn’t been without its problems.

Last week, despite warnings to social distance, my dad’s partner agreed to celebrate her grandson’s birthday in the garden.

‘I want some time with my family,’ she said, dismissing his efforts to comply with lockdown rules. Since I was welcomed into their home after moving back from London, perhaps it seems like double standards.

When we’re all trying to maintain some semblance of normality, I’ve questioned whether living with my dad for the first time is too big a change — and like everyone separated from their family and friends, there are times when I’m hit by a wave of melancholy wondering when I’ll get to hug my mum again.

Combine the rules of lockdown, which require everyone in the same household to stay put, with the problem of an unconventional family and you’ve entered into —at the risk of sounding like a politician — unprecedented family territory.

In an ideal world, we would gather everyone we love under one roof and quarantine together. Yet even without the current crisis, navigating this kind of family dynamic will continue to be a work in progress.

I’m fortunate that my parents live close enough for me to run to my mum’s and chat to her and my brother – who moved back in with her about a year ago – from the driveway. And until things change, that will be my compromise.

Do you have a story you’d like to share? Get in touch by emailing james.besanvalle@metro.co.uk

Share your views in the comments below.

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The heightened awareness about racial injustice triggered by the global Black Lives Matter protests has meant that Black people in the UK are feeling empowered to speak out about the racism they have faced.

And as companies scramble to release statements in support of racial equality, the story appears to be quite different for Black employees who are sharing examples of microaggressions and outright racism.

René and Adesuwa, two Black women, are the founders of nine to five’s, an online community for Black people in the workplace.

They started a hashtag (#BlackInTheOffice) to create a space for Black employees to anonymously share their experiences – and the responses they received were overwhelming.

The pair encouraged people to send them private messages with their workplace experiences, before they would add them to the thread without revealing who had sent it. And it makes for incredibly upsetting reading.

Black women were subjected to negative comments about their natural hair styles, weaves and wigs, with colleagues touching their hair and even attempting to remove wigs during work night outs.

Many Black employees found out upon leaving their jobs they were being significantly underpaid, and being replaced with lesser qualified white people paid more.

Lots of submissions reported being labelled as ‘aggressive’, ‘pushy’, ‘sassy’ or ‘negative’.

Some said they were fired shortly after reporting incidents with the excuse that they were suddenly ‘under-performing’, or were paid off to keep quiet about the behaviour of senior individuals.

Many said they were made to feel – or openly told – that they were only hired because they were Black, to meet a quota. And there were many reports of inappropriate comments made about drug use, gangs and slavery.

‘One example of racism I suffered was being told by a white colleague that I would be spending the weekend “smoking crack”,’ read one submission.

‘A Black employee asked if we’d like to go to a hip hop karaoke session and a white Latino manager replied: “Does the karaoke end with everyone shooting each other?”’ added another.

‘When I initially started wearing wigs in my second year of being in the company, a male work colleague threatened to pull my wig off on a night out,’ said another.

The submissions also revealed the toll these experiences took on people’s physical and mental health, with many reporting panic attacks, being diagnosed with depression, and even suffering alopecia.

René and Adesuwa say the thread is important for highlighting the lived experiences of Black people in professional settings.

‘This idea that racism doesn’t exist at work, it’s covert, and that as a community we are almost “imagining it” or “being oversensitive” is not true,’ they tell Metro.co.uk.

‘These are our real life, daily experiences. 

‘It’s not enough to put out lazy statements of solidarity, make one-off donations and quickly hire a Black diversity and inclusion lead. We need them to truly create a safe workplace for their Black employees, where they have the equal opportunity to thrive and succeed.’

The pair are calling for companies to address this problem with action – to pay Black employees fairly, hire and promote Black people into senior positions, address the issues of their Black employee community directly. 

‘We will be putting together an open letter next week, where we would like companies to make a pledge,’ they say.

They hope that by elevating these conversations and making more people aware of the realities of workplace racism and microaggressions, people in power will have to start making changes.

Do you have a story to share? We would like to hear from you.

Get in touch: metrolifestyleteam@metro.co.uk.

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A teacher turned up to class wearing her wedding dress for adorable photos with her students before getting married. Kindergarten teacher, Kelsey Moeller, 30, made the surprise appearance at school to give her class the chance to see her wearing all-white before anyone else, including her soon-to-be husband.

Passionate elementary school teacher, Kelsey, from El Dorado, Arkansas, spent more than an hour getting ready for a dress rehearsal of her wedding day with her bashful class. Adorable photos show the moment the students clapped eyes on Kelsey, who pulled the stunt to ensure that although they wouldn’t be at the wedding, the students could be part of her big day.

Kelsey, who got married to John, 28 on May 30, said: ‘The kids got to see me in my dress before anyone else, including John or my dad. I have a very strong bond with my class and I absolutely love going to school.

‘The look on their faces when they saw me was just so cute. The photos from in class are some of my favorite from the whole wedding.

‘The kids did not know I was going to do that, I just asked their parents to send them to school in nice clothes because we were going to do some special photos. It was a really special moment and we had such a good time.

‘I didn’t actually tell John I was going to do that, I didn’t know how he would react, but I told him afterwards and he loved the idea.’

Kelsey and her husband John, a salesman, started dating in March 2018 after being set up with one and other through friends. Kelsey admits that for her it was ‘love at first sight’ and the couple hit it off straight away.

15 months later, in July 2019, Kelsey said yes when John asked for her hand in marriage and almost right away they started planning for their 2020 wedding day.

The ceremony and reception took place on May 30 at an idyllic cattle ranch which was transformed into a luxury wedding venue for the couple and their 200 guests.

Thankfully, despite the coronavirus outbreak, the Moellers were able to tie the knot with social distancing measures in place in line with the Arkansas state guidelines.

But before walking down the aisle to marry the love of her life, Kelsey made secret arrangements to strut into school for her first ever public appearance in her wedding dress.

Kelsey, who teaches at the Hugh Goodwin Elementary School, added: ‘I’ve been a teacher for seven years and I love my job. I FaceTime and text the kids in my class all the time and we get on so well.

‘When I set down with my wedding photographer to talk about photos it was actually her idea to do some pictures in school with the students. The job means so much to me so I wanted to do it.

‘I love teaching the children life skills and I still find it crazy how soon they all grow up.

‘When the kids saw me some of them didn’t know where to look and were all embarrassed, it was real cute.’

Kelsey’s pre-wedding photo shoot with her class luckily took place in March, one week before social distancing measures were introduced in Arkansas. The state was placed into a coronavirus lockdown at the end of March, which has since been eased by officials.

The easing of restrictions, last month, meant Kelsey and John were able to hold their wedding as planned albeit with social distancing measures in place and a greater emphasis on personal hygiene.

A stunning ceremony on May 30 at a converted cattle ranch barn was followed by an evening party complete with a taco bar and entertainment.

The coronavirus pandemic may not have had an impact on the wedding itself but it did stop Kelsey and John from going on their honeymoon to Mexico. Nevertheless, the newlyweds did still go for a short break to Florida for an alternative vacation.

Sometimes the things you love the most hurt you. Ice cream, for example.

We can all relate to gleefully biting into our fave cold snacks but then instantly suffering brain freeze.

One cat who had the pleasure of trying ice cream for the first time soon regretted it.

In a TikTok video, a kitty was seen being fed a tiny dollop of the creamy goodness.

The cat didn’t seem to enjoy it for long as the brain freeze resulted in a dramatic reaction, causing the cat to grimace.

Sabrina Bernatchez, who lives in Saint-Jean-sur-Richelieu, Quebec, Canada, posted the now-viral video on TikTok. It has since been liked more than 300,000 times.

While most enjoyed the video, others were concerned about the cat.

One person wrote: ”Goodness, doesn’t look too keen on it, perhaps the cat has sensitive teeth.’

Others said it was ‘cruel’ to feed the cat such a cold item.

We spoke to Cats Protection to find out whether it’s a bad idea to feed cats ice cream.

A spokesperson tells Metro.co.uk: ‘While we cannot be certain that cats experience brain freeze, we do know that they respond in a negative way to an unpleasant sensation. Under no circumstances should cats ever be subjected to discomfort or pain for entertainment purposes.’

Brain freeze occurs when blood vessels in the mouth or throat get cooled rapidly by something in the mouth (e.g. ice cream). The blood vessels dilate, causing the unpleasant sensation of ‘brain freeze’.

The spokesperson continues: ‘Having brain freeze is an uncomfortable and somewhat painful feeling. Aside from the welfare issue, Cats Protection does not endorse feeding cats ice cream or other dairy products.

‘Not only are they high in calories, but as most cats are lactose-intolerant and can’t tolerate cow’s milk, feeding these products can lead to sickness.’

The cat charity recommends commercial meat derived diet – canned or dried – designed for cats.

The RSPCA concurs and adds that cats cannot taste sweetness, so ice cream isn’t the amazing treat you imagine for a kitty.

They tell Metro.co.uk: ‘It’s important to feed your cat a well balanced and nutritious diet and avoid too many treats and tidbits, including human food.

‘Feeding ice cream is unlikely to cause any serious issues, but as cats are lactose intolerant feeding them milk or ice cream could cause tummy upset and is not recommended.

‘These can contribute to cats becoming overweight which is an increasing problem with serious health implications. If you do give treats be sure that they are cat appropriate and their meal size is reduced accordingly.

‘They cannot taste sweetness, so many cats prefer meaty treats or the occasional piece of chicken or cooked fish instead. Giving some of their normal daily food amount as a treat is a good way to ensure your cat doesn’t pile on the pounds.’

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With IRL dating and sex with people who don’t live in your household not currently a possibility, the ability to sext (that’s sexy messaging, all you cool cats and kittens) is all the more important.

Dates over video chat and long drawn-out phone calls are all well and good, but eventually in the world of romantic relationships, you’ll want to make things sexual.

That’s where sexting comes in.

But the art of turning someone on through messaged words alone doesn’t come easy to everyone. Sexting can feel awkward and uncomfortable, and it can be tough to find the right words.

Mia Sabat, a sex therapist at the audio-based intimate wellbeing app Emjoy, knows her way around a good sext, and so we’ve chatted with her to get the essential tips we all need to get started.

Start with consent

Last year we did a feature on whether you need to ask someone for their permission before you drop a nude into their DMs, and the general consensus was yes, you do.

This doesn’t need to be a formal arrangement that feels like a cold contract.

Mia recommends trying one of these phrases to ‘signal that you’re keen to spice things up a little, but also allow someone to easily say no without pressure’:

• Do you fancy a little dirty talk?
• Do you want to take this up a notch and give sexting a try?
• I love when you talk dirty to me – could we try it over text?
• Are you turned on right now? If you want, I’d love to hear more

Keep it relaxed and breezy, but do always make sure a person actually wants to get sexual before you send over sexy messages or images.

And if your partner doesn’t fancy it, respect their ‘no’.

‘Unsolicited dirty texts (or even worse – sexual images) might seem funny to some, but make no mistake – they are offensive, upsetting and can even be classed as harassment,’ says Mia. ‘Avoiding them is the best way to keep yourself and any prospective partners happy and safe.’

Establish ground rules

Before you get going, it’s worth chatting through what you’re both comfortable with.

Mia suggests asking some questions: ‘Are you going to share pictures or videos? If so, how suggestive or explicit will they be? Are you comfortable incorporating toys? Will you allow your partner to tell you what to do or how to touch yourself? What platform are comfortable sexting on, and does it protect your privacy? Do you want to explore more wild or vivid fantasies? Where is your line with dirty talk – do you like to be called names, and if so, what is on, and off, limits?

‘Before moving forward, make sure you’re on the same page to ensure you both have the most enjoyable and pleasurable experience possible.’

Again, don’t stress about this being a super rigid checklist – just a few brief questions to make sure everyone’s comfortable will make a world of difference.

Plus, once you know everyone’s personal boundaries, you can get on with sexting without worrying your messages may be poorly received, getting rid of a lot of nerves.

Keep it simple

Trust us, you don’t need to get too poetic. Sometimes simple is best – especially if you’re feeling a bit uncertain.

Mia recommends: ‘Tell your partner what you wish you could do with them: where you want to stroke or lick them, how you want to touch their body, how you want them to touch themselves. You can also ask them to do the same.

‘Alternatively, you can narrate what you’re doing to yourself, how your body is responding, and what you’re wishing they could do, if they were there with you.

‘You can also try exploring fantasies that you’ve long-dreamt of sharing with your partner – just be sure they’re comfortable exploring them, too. Ultimately, don’t be afraid to vocalise your wants, needs and desires. This is an intimate experience for you to enjoy together, so leave your inhibitions at the door.’

Use the phrase ‘I want…’ as a starting point. What do you want to do? What would you do if you were together right at this moment?

Don’t force it

This ties into keeping it simple, but if you’re someone who experiences a full-body cringe at certain sex-related terms (pussy, for example, which makes many people shudder) or tone, you don’t have to use those words.

Don’t force yourself to take on a smut-filled persona if that feels deeply unnatural. And don’t worry about your words being perfectly written – it’s not important and if your partner is going to judge your sentence structure, they don’t really deserve the joy of a nice sext.

‘Just express yourself comfortably, in a way that feels sexy and exciting to you,’ says Mia. ‘If you’re uncomfortable with using more explicit words, establish terms that you and your S/O like to use when getting intimate.

‘Like all forms of intimacy, sexting is at its best when communication is clear and carefree.’

Go slow and be responsive

Tune into how your partner is responding to your sexts and respond based on their responses. This is supposed to be an interactive conversation, not a monologue with one person loving life while the other one grimaces at their phone screen.

Respect those boundaries you discussed earlier and make sure you’re thinking of your partner’s pleasure and turn-ons, not just saying whatever you want to get yourself off.

Mia advises: ‘If you have agreed to incorporate raunchier dirty talk into your sexting session, it’s best to start off slowly, rather than jumping right into the deep end.

‘Like any sexual experience, it’s important to understand and cultivate a positive connection between the two of you while sexting.

‘Know your audience, ask questions to help bring them up to your wavelength and let them decide what they would, or would not, like to engage with.

‘Asking questions like: “Are you naughty or nice?”, “Do you like it soft, dirty or hard?” or even simply stating “I’m wet/hard/horny” can help you gauge the context to see if it’s best to pursue the topic, or simply play it off and move on to something the both of you find stimulating.’

Have fun

This whole sexting thing is supposed to be fun – if it’s filling you with anxiety and dread, you don’t have to do it.

Anyone you’re sexting with should want you to enjoy the experience, too, so shouldn’t make you feel judged or uncomfortable. Relax into it and try to have fun without worrying whether you’re doing sexting ‘right’.

‘Remember that sexting is primarily a tool to help you and your partner build intimacy and enjoy a positive, fulfilling sexual experience together,’ Mia adds.

‘Don’t get too caught up on figuring out the perfect thing to say, or even in executing every detail of each others’ fantasies. It’s okay to fumble, be spontaneous and keep things fun and light!

‘Once you are on the same wavelength, see where the conversation goes and focus on pleasure, exploration, and desire. The best sexting sessions will come out of excitement – so lie back, relax, and have fun with it.’

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Elaine McAnulty is a seasoned marathon runner – having completed over 200 since she started in 2004.

Missing getting her miles in during lockdown, she decided to try a new challenge – 20 marathons in 20 days (because it’s 2020).

Elaine, from Banbridge, Northern Ireland, knew that marathon fundraising was important to many charities but with events cancelled due to coronavirus, they were going to miss out.

She decided to use her challenge raise money for local charity Cancer Focus NI, after hearing that donations were down 80%.

Starting on 19 May, she ran for around five and a half hours of running every day, finishing on Sunday 7 June.

Every day, she ran a nine-mile loop three times, stopping off once on each loop to get water from her mother-in-law’s car boot.

She tells Metro.co.uk ‘I’m delighted, happy and very thankful I was able to get finished without injury.’

Beauty salon owner Elaine starting running marathons back in 2004, and since then, she has completed hundreds.

She explains: ‘At first I only did one a year in Belfast and then I found out there was one in Dublin too so I started doing those two. Newry started in 2008 so I had three.

‘I met familiar faces and someone told me about Marathon Club Ireland and recognition medals for 25, 50, 75 and 100 marathons. I thought it would be amazing to try and get to 25.

‘That was May 2016 and I completed 21 that year. Now, I have 212.

‘The most I’ve done is 67 in one year but the most I had done consecutively was four, or three in two days but nothing like 20 in 20.’

Usually busy working, this is the first time Elaine has been able to commit so much time to running and she decided she had to give it a go.

She says: ‘I decided to give myself a challenge and then I heard on the radio about Cancer Focus and how their funding was down.’

She admits it was tough as she had to wake up at 4.30am every day to avoid running when it was too warm.

And even if she was suffering from aches and pains, she had to get out and do the same route all over again the next day.

Sometimes friends joined her along the way to run with her from a social distance.

‘The 4:30am was the hard part. A lot of the days it was 25C when I was finishing so getting started early was helpful.

‘But I had no problem getting to sleep at night,’ she laughs.

On Sunday, her husband David, parents Ivor and Marie McIllroy, sisters Anna and Barbara, brother-in-law Richard, two nephews and god-daughter Isabella watched as she crossed the finish line, completing a total of 524 miles.

They decorated the garden with Cancer Focus bunting and enjoyed a cake to celebrate her achievements from a distance.

After a rest on Monday morning, Elaine even managed to get out and do some running later that day and again yesterday, although a shorter distance than she’s been doing for the last three weeks.

She’s raised over £2,620 for charity, smashing her £400 target but hopes to keep going and raise as much as possible for the cause.

For now, she’s taking it a bit easier and although she hopes to get back to more marathons soon, she’s not planning any more challenges just yet.

To donate, visit her fundraising page.

Do you have a story to share?

Get in touch at metrolifestyleteam@metro.co.uk.

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Aldi’s beauty range is probably the worst-kept secret across lovers of brands like Smashbox and Urban Decay.

The supermarket’s products – which they claim to be ‘inspired by’ larger brands – are pretty much like-for-like dupes, with way smaller price tags.

This range is now back, with some added newbies to boot, potentially saving you £125 on the big brand products if you switched.

With prices starting from £2.49, you can get your hands on facial oils, primers, eyeshadow palettes, and more at a bargain price.

Lacura Snapshot Ready Primer, £5.99

If you were to swap from the Smashbox Photo Finish Primer that looks remarkably like the Lacura version, you’d save £22.

Lacura Radiant Concealer, £3.99

This one is comparable to Nars’ Radiant Creamy Concealer so you can swap and save over £20.

Lacura Naturals Eyeshadow Palettes, £5.99

Anyone getting vibes of the Urban Decay Naked palettes here? If you normally for these £40+ options, switching can save you a huge £37.

Lacura Too Legit Waterproof Mascara, £5.99

Similar to Benefit’s They’re Real, Too Legit has great reviews. Not to mention, it’s £16 cheaper than the Benefit version.

Lacura Setting Spray, £3.99

It might not exactly be warm enough to warrant a heavy duty setting spray right now (especially given we aren’t going outside), but if you made the switch from Urban Decay’s Setting Spray, you’d save over £21.

Lacura Detangling Hair Brush, £2.49

The Tangle Teezer is the OG hairbrush for long or curly hair. If you’re the ype who normally loses their brush (or gets it stuck in your mane) switch to these Lacura ones and save £9.51.

There are also Pixi-like tonic waters, highlighting sticks, and the Liz Earle style cleaners and oils that have been a hit from the supermarket.

Grab the range in-store from 18 June or online at Aldi.co.uk from 14  June.

What do you think of the Lacura dupes?

Share your experiences with us at MetroLifestyleTeam@metro.co.uk.

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Russian influencer Marina Balmasheva caused uproar after she recently posted a throwback picture with her partner, who used to be her step-son.

The 35-year-old, from the western region of Krasnodar Krai, was married to husband Alexey, 45, for 13 years before they got divorced.

After their marriage ended, she started a relationship with Alexey’s son Vladimir, 20.

Now Marina has revealed that she is expecting a child with Vladimir.

In an Instagram video, Marina handed Vladimir the positive pregnancy test and embraced him.

The couple also announced their plans to marry since finding out about the pregnancy.

Marina, who is four weeks pregnant, rose to fame after documenting her weight loss journey.

The blogger, who has more than 400,000 followers, lives with Vladimir and three out of the five children she adopted with her former partner Alexey.

The controversial influencer shared the news on Instagram where she wrote: ‘[I’m] tired of hiding… Everything is possible in this world. We are four weeks and yes. That is why we decided to get married’.

Some fans congratulated the mum and wished her well.

‘Congratulations from the bottom of my heart,’ wrote one user while another said: ‘I read and cried! This is a miracle! Congratulations! Take care of yourself! How awesome!’

Others criticised the blogger for her relationship with Vladmir, who she met when he was a child.

One person commented: ‘What shocks me most is that this boy grew up before her very eyes.’ 

In a TV show, Marina claimed her life with Vladimir is more exciting than the one she led with Alexey.

She said: ‘I don’t feel like a mature woman, like a woman who has to do stuff around the house. He makes me feel like a young and happy girl.’

Marina adds that she is not worried about Vladimir leaving her for someone else. She said: ‘I understand that in some time he may meet another younger woman and leave me but I think – no. He will grow into a brave real man.’

One of her many followers said that they were glad Marina was making Alexey a grandfather by having Vladimir’s baby.

Do you have a story?

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Gemma Palmer, 35, was no stranger to lip fillers, having had them injected in August 2017 with no problems.

However, the mum-of-one found herself on the end of a medical emergency after going back for more in October 2018.

Support worker Gemma went to a local beautician and paid £180 to have her lips injected with a full millilitre of lip filler – double her usual dose.

But rather than the smooth and even way her lips had been plumped before, the liquid gathered together on the right side of her top lip throughout the following week, leaving her lopsided with a swollen and painful mouth.

Gemma could only eat soup due to the severe pain, and she knew something was seriously wrong.

After the reaction, she had the filler dissolved, and was pain-free for eight months until further complications caused her lip to burst five times.

Despite the dissolving she’d had done, Gemma felt her lip becoming hot and painful, before doubling in size and then bursting multiple times.

Gemma said: ‘I was at home cleaning when I felt a burning sensation and throbbing in my lip.

‘I knew it was about to flare up again but hoped it would be ok by the morning – how wrong I was!

‘I woke up and my lip had swollen up so much that I could hardly speak.

‘It carried on swelling over the next couple of days until it finally popped open which was both disgusting and extremely painful.’

Gemma visited her local GP surgery but despite telling them about her previous problems with lip fillers, her issue was dismissed as a cold sore.

Sent home with antiviral tablets, the lip slowly cleared up over the next few weeks, but the problem has come back every few months, and Gemma has now suffered with her lip swelling and exploding five times – most recently in March this year.

‘The pain gets more extreme every time and this time round has definitely been the worst,’ said Gemma.

‘My whole mouth filled with blisters from the swelling which kept popping and filling my entire mouth with blood. I couldn’t eat, I was in constant pain.’

Gemma has now visited cosmetic surgery specialists, who told her they reckon some of the lip filler is still trapped inside her face – a full two years after she had them done.

The Litherland, Lancashire mum is awaiting specialist treatment to have it removed, and is warning other women of the dangers of fillers.

Gemma said: ‘It was horrific, I was in so much pain both physically and mentally.

‘My lip made me cry and I was so upset both before and after my lip exploded as the pain and the swelling affected my everyday life.

‘I was really scared and worried when my lip exploded – I was so anxious that it could leave me disfigured for life.

‘I felt so embarrassed and ashamed to leave my house and also embarrassed to tell people what exactly had happened.

‘Altogether, I’ve had about six weeks off of work because of the lip filler problems.’

The next step for Gemma is to have the remaining filler dissolved, which will be coupled with a course of antibiotics to hopefully stop any further reactions.

‘Hopefully this will be the last time it happens,’ she said.

‘I’ve been in agony for two years because of these problems and I just want other girls to know the danger of lip fillers before they go ahead and get injected.

‘I do feel deep regret and I wish I had never had them done.’

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With lockdown easing and summer marching ahead, many of us are trying to think of creative ways to enjoy a getaway this season.

And, given that we have been starved of social contact for so long, the best option might be to get all our loved ones in the same place for a few nights of much needed fun, relaxation and escapism.

With foreign travel off the cards for the time being, staycations are the next best thing – and these stunning country houses offered by Independent Cottages could be the perfect destination for you and your friends to burn off some steam after lockdown.

Of course, at the moment we are not allowed to stay overnight anywhere other than our own homes, and we can’t mingle inside with people from other households.

But as soon as we are allowed to travel for longer than a day-trip, and hang out properly in groups – these beautiful properties need to be top of your list.

Lavender Barn, Somerset

This luxurious barn property in Somerset is a great choice for an extra-special family getaway, sleeping up to 12 guests. The sleek and stylish property boasts six comfortable bedrooms, plus its very own swimming pool and hot tub. Perfect for family members who want an energetic splash in the pool or a relaxing dip in the hot tub.  The converted barn also boats a fabulous modern kitchen and a blissful al fresco dining area. The games room and free wifi is sure to keep the kids entertained too. Ideally located within a scenic area of West Somerset, the home is a perfect base for exploring the Quantock Hills Area of Outstanding Natural Beauty and Exmoor National Park.

Cop Farm, Peak District

This sprawling farm property is located near Buxton in the beautiful Peak District, and can sleep up to 14 people. 

Sitting 1,300 feet above sea level, the luxury farmhouse offers panoramic views of the stunning countryside. 

The property boasts everything you need for a holiday with family or friends, including five spacious bedrooms; a games room; children’s play area, and loads of of private outdoor space. 

There is also an abundance of nature to enjoy, including exploring the Peak Forest or cycling to the spa town of Buxton.

Cuckoo Croft Barn, Shropshire

Cuckoo Croft Barn’s traditional setting makes the modern and spacious interior of this property somewhat of a surprise. The barn boasts open spaces with a light and airy feel throughout, and can sleep up to 12 guests. 

The property is located in the quiet town of Ryton. The area offers incredible walking and cycling opportunities, including an 8-mile walk from Dorrington through to Staffordshire. 

Fun-packed activities available to book include quad biking and paintball, or spa and pamper packages.

Cowgill Grange, Yorkshire Dales

Sitting in the heart of the Yorkshire Dales, Cowgill Grange offers an idyllic stay in the small hamlet of Cowgill. The stunning property offers incredible views from every angle, and the location is a popular choice for walkers and cyclists with a trail of scenic routes to explore right from the doorstep.

The property is located on the route of the Settle-Carlisle train line – renowned as one of the most scenic train journeys in the world. 

Every room of Cowgill Grange oozes with traditional glamour and the large property boasts seven bedrooms, a spacious kitchen, two dining rooms and two living rooms – each with their own log fire.

Incleborough House, Norfolk

This luxury coastal property offers an exceptionally classy getaway for the whole family, or all your mates. It is able to host up to 18 guests across seven spacious bedrooms. The property is a traditional Grade II listed building dating all the way back to the 16th-century.

The house is historic, but it has also been modernised to offer modern amenities including a large hot tub, a full-sized pool table and a dining conservatory. The home also boasts half an acre of private walled gardens.

You can also enjoy a welcome pack on arrival, featuring champagne, fluffy dressing gowns and homemade cake – there’s even the option to book your own personal chef. 

The beautiful coastal location of the property is just 300m from the sea.

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At school, Naomi Lovell was already over 6ft and was often called names.

Now aged 22, she’s 6ft 7in and still gets teased for her height, with strangers asking is she is on stilts.

She feels her height has stood in the way of her love life and she has never had a boyfriend.

But she’s had the last laugh after being scouted as a model.

Cafe-worker Naomi, from Doncaster, Yorkshire, who also sports flaming red hair, said: ‘I was bullied in school for my height.

‘Even teachers would comment on it.

‘I was always picked for netball – even though I was rubbish at it – just because I’m tall.

‘I do remember feeling like I was being used for my height.

‘It affected my self-esteem and in some ways robbed me of my childhood as everyone always assumed I was much older and would treat me like an adult or expect me to be really mature.’

She’s also found it difficult to find clothes to fit her tall frame.

But Naomi was signed up to do extra work and modelling by agency, UGLYS, in Shepherd’s Bush, south London, in October 2018, and she said it changed how she felt about herself.

She added: ‘I feel like I’ve really gained confidence since joining the modelling agency. They specialise in taller or unique looking girls.

‘They asked me onto their books almost as soon as they met me. It was a real compliment. I finally felt beautiful.’

Her family are nowhere near her size, with mum, Karen, 58, a retired midwife, standing at 5ft 7in, and dad Nigel, 51, a railway engineer, is 6ft 2in.

Her sister Bethan, 25, a student, is 5ft 10, and Amanda, 28, a warehouse worker, is 5ft 9in.

They’ve ben incredibly supportive and after her agency casting, her family whisked her off to a pamper and photo-shoot session to boost her confidence.

She said: ‘It was such a good day.

‘I had always been told that I should be a model with my long legs and height, but because I always felt like the odd one out I never really believed it.’

She has now been to multiple castings for film and TV and is gaining confidence on photoshoots.

‘I’m still working on that side of my career and working on my self-esteem,’ she said.

‘They often call me up for Viking parts or giant parts in fantasy films.

‘It’s fun and makes me appreciate my height as they’re roles that small girls couldn’t be considered for.’

But there have been some negative aspects for Naomi too – since starting an Instagram account to document her progress into modelling, the waitress has been inundated with sexual comments about her height.

‘They are very rude comments, lots of sexual innuendo about my height,’ she said.

‘They send me sexual images of tall women and short men.

‘It really makes me feel sick, I hate it.

‘But these are the same men that call me beautiful and gorgeous so it’s a bit confusing!

‘Maybe I’ve lived a sheltered life but I had no idea this was a thing.

‘It’s difficult because I’ve always wanted a boyfriend but never had one – but these older men are not what I had in mind at all.

‘I’ll always be too tall for most boys my age so that does make it harder, I feel like boys don’t look at me in that romantic way because of how tall I am.

‘I did try dating apps but I just got a lot of stupid questions and I just want to find someone naturally.’

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When it comes to deciding on a snack for sitting in front of the TV, it’s hard to choose between sweet or savoury.

The new flavour from Ben & Jerry’s means you don’t have to.

The ice cream brand has launches Chip Happens.

It contains chocolate ice cream, fudge bits and crunchy potato chips (or crisps as we call them in the UK).

It might sound unusual but it’s that balance of sweet and salty you get with popcorn or salted caramel.

It’s been created in collaboration with Netflix and baking show Nailed It!.

The flavour has been available in the U.S. for a few months now but it is coming to the UK soon.

It will be available in Asda later this month and will cost £4.50 per tub.

On their website, Ben & Jerry’s says: ‘Sometimes “chip” happens and everything’s a mess, but we Nailed It! with this chip-filled limited batch. When smooth chocolate ice cream meets fudge chips & salty swirls, they pack a serious one-two crunch. The best part? There won’t be anything left to clean up.’

If you aren’t sure about the unusual combination, it has 4.5 stars in the Ben & Jerry’s ratings and reviews section.

One said: ‘I am happy to report Ben & Jerry’s NAILED this flavor. The lighter chocolate, chocolate chunks and the perfectly CRUNCHY salty potato chip swirl is EXACTLY what every sweet/salty craving is made of.’

Other’s disagreed though. Another review said: ‘The chip swirl is like chewing sand and it disrupts the rest of ice cream. This was not pleasant. Icky stuff. Wish I’d never tried it.’

You’ll have to try it for yourself to decide.

Unfortunately, it is a limited edition flavour so if you like it, you better stock up.

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Bad news for fans of salty spread on their toast: Marmite production is struggling due to a shortage of brewers yeast.

We’re currently unable to buy big jars of Marmite’s yeasty spread because, as the brand confirmed on Twitter, the product is only being released in the smaller 250g jar as a temporary measure due to yeast being in short supply.

No, it’s not because everyone’s rushing to make their own sourdough.

As the name suggests, brewers yeast is made by beer brewers, who have slowed and in some cases stopped production because coronavirus and resulting lockdown has caused the closure of pubs. No pubs means no beer being made, and no beer means no brewers yeast.

Over on Twitter, Marmite responded to a desperate plea for the larger 400g squeezy jars by writing: ‘Hi Tim, due to brewers yeast being in short supply (one of the main ingredients in Marmite) Supplies of Marmite have been affected.

‘As a temporary measure we have stopped production of all sizes apart from our 250g size jar which is available in most major retailers.’

This means that for now, you can’t buy your preferred 70g jar, 500g jar, or 400g squeezy jar of Marmite.

But the good news is that the 250g jar remains in production and available at your usual retailer. So if you’re desperate for large quantities of the tar-like substance, you can always just… buy more than one jar.

Other good news is that Unilever, the makers of Marmite, has said the production issue is only temporary and should be resolved ‘in a month or so’.

In short, and for reassurance: we’ll get through this. And if you’re really struggling without Marmite, you can always make do with the delicious/horrifying Marmite peanut butter concoction.

Do you have a story to share?

Get in touch by emailing MetroLifestyleTeam@Metro.co.uk.

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Baby Reau Singh-Okasili is over two months old but she still hasn’t met her grandparents.

Born on 22 March, the day before lockdown was introduced, her extended family have had to stay away to keep her safe.

When her mum Kay fell pregnant, this wasn’t what she imagined. Instead her family can only see her milestones through FaceTime.

Kay, 28, from Manchester, says it has affected her mental health and she is worried about the impact this time will have on the whole family.

Across the UK, Grandparents, aunts, uncles, older siblings and even parents having been missing out on seeing little ones grow.

Others have missed big birthdays and sadly, some haven’t been able to say goodbye to loved ones who have passed away.

But on the other side of the coin, people are spending more time than ever before with the family members they chose to isolate with and that also has difficulties.

Going forward, experts say that the impact of some families being separated while others being forced together will leave a long-lasting sense of trauma.

Missing big moments

Speaking about Reau’s first few months in isolation, Kay explains: ‘It’s been difficult.

‘We have been able to keep in touch with them all as she grows with daily updates and milestone pictures.

‘But I do worry about her bonding with her wider family – we are all very close and it seems as though the opportunity for her to build relationships has been put on hold.

‘She is still very young and I worry that by the time we are back to normal she will be at an age which will take time to develop a bond with her grandparents and other family. Will FaceTime be enough?

‘I have often felt desolate thinking how I have been unable to share these early days with our closest loved ones and show her off. That’s all you want to do when you have a new baby, let the world see them. She is growing into her character each day and it saddens me that it is all behind closed doors.’

Other families agree that missing out on these moments have had a huge impact of their mental health during this time.

Christine Earle’s youngest grandchild was born during lockdown but she hasn’t been able to see any of her four other grandkids during this time, even though they all live nearby.

Christine Earle: ‘Etta was born during lockdown and we haven’t met her properly. We’re hoping to be able to sit in the garden from a distance with her but we don’t know when we will be able to cuddle her.

‘We’re missed all the grandchildren during this time and we have seen them on Zoom but it is not the same.

‘I do worry about how it might impact us and for them it is hard to understand. I know we all have to do it to stay safe but it has been difficult to be apart from them.’

Ammanda Major, ​Head of Service Quality and Clinical Practice at Relate, explains that this is something that could continue to affect families even after the pandemic ends.

She tells Metro.co.uk: ‘There is a sense of loss there for families who have been apart. Often grandparents would see a new baby as soon as possible, but during the pandemic, they will have missed out on that initial bonding.

‘In the grand scheme of things, lockdown hasn’t been for a really long time but it’s understanding to feel that sense of loss for not being able to connect with a grandchild in those early days, or for families missing important celebrations together.

‘It is important to talk about that and your feelings around that going forward.

‘The fundamental thing is that there is a loss, about which, you know, that experience may go on to torment people and some people will have been traumatised by that. I don’t think that’s too strong a word to use. I think we’re going to be looking at a lot of trauma-based issues for people coming out of this for all sorts of reasons.’

Grieving families

Over 40,000 people in the UK have died from coronavirus during the pandemic, while many others have been seriously ill.

Many other people have died from completely unrelated conditions but families have been unable to say goodbye or have a proper funeral because of the restrictions.

Ammanda adds: ‘People died alone, whether that be from coronavirus or something else.

‘Families were not able to be there, hold their loved one’s hand and tell them they love them. Funerals were restricted and many people weren’t able to attend because they were isolating.

‘With that comes a sense of guilt for families. Even though it couldn’t be helped, it doesn’t stop people feeling terribly guilty and have regrets about those situations.’

Tensions amplified

For families that are together, being around each other all the time can bring underlying tensions to the surface.

Reports from China suggest a rise in divorce rates following the lifting of lockdown and law firms in the UK have said that they are preparing for a similar trend here.

But tensions aren’t always between couples – it may be older children struggling with parents, or problems with adult siblings.

Ammanda explains: ‘For lots of families, there will be a realisation that the covid experience has exposed the problems in family relationships.

There will be a realisation that the covid experience has exposed the problems in family relationships.

‘A normal thing that families do where there is a conflict with each other is create space, that might be naturally occurring space like going out of the home to work, or going to school or going to college or going out with mates or just drifting around the shops.

‘All of those things are ways that we create distance, which helps us to cope with difficulties in relationships. People haven’t been able to do that and things are magnified.

‘There will be questions about how they deal with those. People will need to think about how to have those conversations in the best possible way that makes sure that nobody kind of feels blamed or, or sort of emotionally isolated by them.

‘Coming out of this, people will need to talk about what they have noticed and what changes they want to make.’

For some, that may be something as simple as reorganising the morning routine but for others, this experience will have meant a complete reassessment of their family situation and what they want going forward.

Family roles

With home, work and school environments being merged together into one space, the roles that families were used to may have become slightly muddled.

Families have had limited access to childcare and are at home with their children all the time.

Many are trying to balance homeschooling while continuing to work.

But research shows that it is still often women who are carrying out the bulk of childcare and housework.

A study by the Institute of Fiscal Studies and UCL Institute of Education which asked 3,500 opposite gender families about their experiences between 29 April and 15 May, found that:

• Mothers are more likely than fathers to have left paid work since February. 
• Among mothers and fathers who are still in paid work, mothers have seen a bigger proportional reduction in hours of work than fathers.
• Among those doing paid work at home, mothers are more likely than fathers to be spending their work hours simultaneously trying to care for children. 

Alison Andrew, a Senior Research Economist at IFS, said: ‘Mothers are more likely than fathers to have moved out of paid work since the start of lockdown. They have reduced their working hours more than fathers even if they are still working and they experience more interruptions while they work from home than fathers, particularly due to caring for children.

‘Together these factors mean that mothers now are only doing a third of the uninterrupted paid-work hours that fathers are. A risk is that the lockdown leads to a further increase in the gender wage gap.’

Mothers are doing more of the childcare but the study also highlighted that fathers are doing more childcare than before and it may encourage them to keep this up going forward.

Sonya Krutikova, a Deputy Research Director at IFS, said: ‘Fathers, on average, are doing nearly double the hours of childcare they were doing prior to the crisis.

‘This may bring about changes in the attitudes of fathers, mothers, children and employers about the role of fathers in meeting family needs for childcare and domestic work during the working week. It may serve as an impetus for a more equal sharing of childcare and housework between mothers and fathers after lockdown ends.’

Homeschooling

Although teaching kids at home has been stressful for many parents, it has helped get them more involved with their kids’ education.

Many children who might struggle in a classroom environment have been able to learn in a different way with the support of their parents at home.

According to Emma Davidson, co-director of Centre for Research on Families and Relationships, this can be positive moving forward.

‘Children will have benefited from closer care and intimacy with their parents and carers

She says: ‘I think in the circumstances many families will come out into the new ‘normal’ (whatever that may be) the same, or indeed better than before.

‘Children will have benefited from closer care and intimacy with their parents and carers.

‘Many children, especially younger age groups where the stress of exams and futures is not so pressing, will have experienced greater flexibility in how and when to learn, and parents will have a better insight into that learning process too.’

Coming together

With some, particularly older and vulnerable, family members facing weeks inside, there has been a sense of coming together to help those who need it.

With busy lives slowing down, people have had time and are more aware of checking in on these people, even though they may not be able to do it in person.

In an Office of National Statistics survey published on 5 June, 86.9% of those over 70 said that they were keeping in touch with family and friends remotely and it was helping them cope during lockdown.

Ammanda, from Relate, adds: ‘There has been that as a positive for some families as they speak more to each other and I hope that that is something that we can take forward from this but we will wait and see what happens when life gets busier again.’

The Office of National Statistics survey also gave a sense of how communities are coming together to support those who do not have family nearby to help.

50% of people over 70 strongly agreed that their community would support them if they needed help and a further 30.5% said they somewhat agree.

For those with health conditions, 41.8% strongly agreed their community would help them and 27.5%.

In this sense, neighbours are coming together, getting to know each other and giving support to those who need it, creating a wider sense of connection beyond just those within their household.

Lower income families

Emma Davidson highlights that the CRFR is particularly concerned about the impact of the pandemic on lower income families.

The economic effects of the lockdown mean that we are expecting to see more people struggling financially, even when restrictions are lifted.

Emma explains: ‘Our greatest concern within CRFR – and where our research will focus in the future – is on the inequity of this pandemic.

‘It will, to a much greater extent, be middle class families that will fit the oft repeated mantra “we will get through this together”.

‘Like the programme of austerity that preceded it, middle families are more likely to have the capital – economic, social and cultural – necessary for navigating the worst effects of the lockdown.

‘As I wrote on our blog “More affluent households typically have larger houses and gardens, better access to the internet and technology, and greater social and digital capital through which to access practical and emotional support (on-line deliveries, home-based exercise, home school resources). So, while some households are enjoying Waitrose home deliveries, the functioning of our society continues to be reliant on the lowest-paid workers who are not only unable to quarantine themselves, but are also less likely to have secure employment or stable housing”.

‘Already, there is a growing body of evidence that shows that many families are already struggling to meet their financial commitments, with levels of poverty likely to increase significantly without government intervention.’

What comes next?

Parents, kids, couples, and grandparents, have had their relationship dynamics changing completely overnight and after months of lockdown and restrictions, this will have a long term impact.

For some, there is that loss as a cherished loved one has died and they have been unable to grieve in the way we all expect.

For others, they might not have faced a death but they feel a sense of loss for the time and events they had planned and missed out on as a family during this time.

Being together has also amplified tensions and coming out of this intense period, many families with have difficulties to work through and some might find that those conflicts will never heal.

Going forward, families need to work together to understand how to process everything they have learnt from this unique time and address any of the problems that this experience has highlighted.

Although there may be some positive elements for some families, many will have an ongoing sense of trauma and loss that they need to work through together.

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The coronavirus pandemic is prompting an increase in stress and anxiety, both with those who have diagnosed mental health conditions and those without.

Research suggests that life in lockdown could have a ‘devastating impact’ on our mental wellbeing, with experts predicting a mental health crisis will follow the Covid-19 pandemic.

This is why therapy – whether continuing treatment or contacting a therapist for the first time – is so important right now.

How can you access therapy amid the coronavirus pandemic?

Unfortunately, even with the pandemic, the NHS still has waiting lists for mental health support, and you might struggle to be put on it while appointments are being cancelled and GPs are taking telephone consultations instead of in-real-life appointments.

That being said, waiting lists for online therapy and phone session can often be shorter than for in-person therapy. It’s definitely worth checking in with your GP to see what the options are in your local area.

But if you can afford it, searching for a private therapist can be a quicker option.

The best way to go about searching for a therapist is by doing it online. Sites such as Counselling Directory and Psychology Today will have lists of therapists near you. This is perfect for if you’re looking for a therapist long-term, who you’d like to see in real life when lockdown rules relax and sessions can take place again. These sites also allow therapists to offer their rates, so you can get an idea of your budget before getting in contact.

If you’re only looking for a therapist while you’re stuck at home, it doesn’t matter where you are in the world, so you’ll have a lot more options and you’ll may find it easier to find a therapist who suits your budget.

James Hartley, a BACP registered counsellor, tells Metro.co.uk that if you are struggling financially, you may be able to find a therapist who will cater to your budget.

He said: ‘Therapists pre-coronavirus have generally been good at offering concessions to those who cannot afford therapy or are in very precarious situations and this is still the case.

‘When you search for a therapist it will say on their profile their prices and whether they offer concessions or not, and I encourage everyone seeking therapy to ask if this is the case.

‘An additional note is that therapy can often be split over two weeks rather than weekly sessions which can ease the financial burden of therapy in times like these.

‘That being said, therapists are themselves self-employed and are currently facing the same precarity as everyone else. Referral numbers have plummeted with the pandemic across the private and public sector which means there are fewer people seeking support and whilst some private therapists have the financial stability to be able to offer much cheaper therapy, others do not.

‘Therapy can often be seen as an indulgence, however, people who have the financial capacity to access private therapy should feel inspired to do so because they are not only investing in their own happiness but, they are also enabling a person who is helping them to carry on helping others, not to mention, also not taking up the very precious space in free NHS services so that those less fortunate can also be helped quickly.’

How will your virtual therapy differ from face-to-face sessions?

James said you should be given the option to have your sessions by either video or phone call, and you shouldn’t be pressured into doing one or the other.

He adds that it may feel a little ‘odd’ to be talking to a therapist on the phone, explaining: ‘This is completely normal, just like it’s normal to feel anxious at the start of face-to-face therapy.

‘All therapy comes with feelings of being exposed and vulnerable, however, people often report that over time this gets better and in the case of telephone therapy, for example, it gives the unexpected benefit of a sense of security by more anonymity, helping you feel safe enough to talk about your difficulties.

‘The main difference of telephone and video therapy is that it will be currently in your own home and this poses challenges. For example, confidentiality.

‘Often people need to talk about the difficulties at home, yet are stuck in the very place where problems are arising and may not feel comfortable. So arranging sessions when you may be able to have privacy is important.

‘Also, setting clear boundaries with family members to ensure you are not intruded upon and have a quiet safe space to speak openly.

‘Technology is also a challenge. Your therapist should ensure that you have a backup plan should a computer or telephone fail or your wifi connection be poor.’

Will you be able to have social distanced sessions during lockdown?

Currently, professional therapists are not offering physical, face-to-face sessions, because it is not sufficiently safe to do so.

However, this is expected to change quickly as businesses begin to reopen, and according to James, many therapists are eager for this to happen.

If this does happen, it’s important to make your own risk assessments. If you’re high risk and have been told to stay home, you should stick with the virtual sessions.

It’s also important to not attend any sessions in person if you have coronavirus symptoms.

How quickly can you get help from the NHS during this time?

You firstly need to speak to your GP for them to make a referral for the type of help you need. This can be a lengthy process as you first need to wait for an appointment, and then be put on the waiting list – it can then take weeks to months to years to make it to the top.

James explained: ‘Waiting times vary in each area of the country with NHS and NHS commissioned services – to find this out all you need to do is give them a call. However, it is not unrealistic to expect to wait from six weeks to over a year for some therapies in NHS and NHS commissioned services.

‘Waiting times have long been an issue due to the dissolving of social services in communities over the past decade, which has caused those who would normally be supported in the community to become dependent on the one NHS psychological service in their area, which is underfunded, i.e. understaffed to then be able to meet the real need of suffering in society.

‘With regards to private therapy, there is little to no waiting time and you could expect some therapists to offer you an appointment the same or following week you enquire.’

If you find yourself really struggling and are in crisis, the best thing you can do is to go to A&E to be assessed by the on-duty mental health team in your area.

How accessible are virtual therapy appointments right now?

Private therapy is very accessible, with little to no waiting time, more flexibility, and more freedom to decide the course of therapy.

But, of course, it costs money – which many people simply can’t afford.

James tells us: ‘My private clients have found sessions to be very helpful and whilst we may be physically separated, my clients also report that we are able to make real changes in their lives, and still feel the meaningful therapeutic connection which is inherent to good therapy; they feel genuinely cared for, valued and understood.

‘All these benefits are equally possible for therapy in the NHS. However, waiting times are obviously an issue with regards to access.

‘Therapy in the NHS is sadly also bound to organisational targets and performance, therefore, is time and choice limited, meaning the number of sessions, type and method of delivery of therapy are choices out of the client’s control.’

James adds that if it is a choice between funding your own therapy and feeding your children, the best thing you can do is call your GP and get on a waiting list.

In the meantime, GPs are currently able to prescribe medication over the phone, offering a same-day prescription, so if you would find medication for your mental health beneficial right now, it’s one step you can take while you wait for therapy.

But you absolutely should do your research around private therapists – many have different budgets and some therapists work for as little as £30 an hour.

You should also be completely honest with them about your budget, as some therapists may also offer two sessions for the price of one or tweak the cost to make it easier for you.

James continued: ‘If you have the financial capacity and safety at home to access private therapy then don’t wait.

‘Coronavirus is a scary time but its intensity is providing us all with a chance to reflect upon the way we live our lives and what we value as important.

‘Counselling and psychotherapy is the perfect tool to not only help and navigate distress, but it can help a person realise their ambitions.

‘We need to get out of the mindset that therapy is an indulgence and see it as an essential part of living well that pays back in the long run – just like having a personal trainer, eating healthily, putting your car in for a service or going to the dentist.’

To talk about mental health in a private, judgement-free zone, join our Mentally Yours Facebook group.

Our Mentally Yours podcast is chatting through mental health amid the coronavirus pandemic with special dedicated episodes. You can listen on Spotify, Audioboom, and iTunes.

Do you have a story to share?

Get in touch by emailing MetroLifestyleTeam@Metro.co.uk.

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A mum has shared a super easy no-bake recipe that even the most amateur bakers won’t mess up.

Laura Middleton, from Kingston-upon-Hull, explained how the simple recipe doesn’t include any items currently missing in supermarket shelves such as flours and extracts.

All it requires a bag of Maltesers, Digestive biscuits, butter, golden syrup, and some white chocolate.

Taking to Facebook group Extreme Couponing and Bargains UK, the mum shared the seven steps to create the delicious dessert at home.

And good news, you don’t need to fiddle with the oven as this dish requires no baking nor leaving in the fridge to chill.

But it does require time to set as Laura recommends leaving the cake on the side overnight, ready to eat the next day.

You know what they say, good things come to those who wait.

To begin, you have to crush the Digestive biscuits and Maltesers in a large bowl before adding melted butter and golden syrup.

Spread the mixture out evenly on a tray and add melted white chocolate on top.

Then sprinkle a handful of blended Maltesers over the top and finish off with chocolate buttons. 

The last step is to just let it set overnight, ready to dig into the following day.

Members of the Facebook group can’t wait to get started.

Some said they already tried the recipe and it worked a treat on them. Others say they plan to make it soon.

One person wrote on the post: ‘oh God I want this now!’ with others sharing the sentiment, saying: ‘I have to try this now’.

Others wondered what happens if the cake is left in the fridge however people pointed out that it turns too hard and the chocolate ends up cracking.

Malteser cakes are certainly popular as another Facebook group, the Slow Cooker Recipes and Tips page shared a Malteser and Baileys fudge that proved to be a hit.

It doesn’t require much effort and takes just a few hours to cook.

Our kind of baking.

Do you have a story?

Email metrolifestyleteam@metro.co.uk to tell us more.

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Every little girl’s dream is to have a bed worthy of a princess – and that is exactly what this dad created for his friend’s daughters.

Wayne Mulholland, a 38-year-old father of three from Coventry, created a stunning bunk bed for his friend’s daughters – and it cost him just £200, a fraction of what a shop-bought bunkbed would cost. 

The bed itself has two levels for sleeping, stairs at one side to reach the top bunk, and a pink slide at the other side for a fun way to get down in the morning.

Along the edges are cut-out designs of love hearts and butterflies, for that special princess touch.

We predict some fights about who gets to sleep up top.

‘The idea of my builds are all off the top of my head so that each one is unique,’ Wayne told money-saving community LatestDeals.co.uk.

‘To get the hearts and butterflies that I used, I bought some small MDF templates from ebay for a few pounds, drew around them and cut them out with a jigsaw. 

‘There is a lot of work involved in making these, as I draw on the MDF sheet and cut everything out using a jigsaw. 

‘I built the bed using 12mm MDF. I drew the design on using MDF stencils and cut it all out.’

The framework of the bed was made using 4×2 timbers, which Wayne says makes it a very sturdy bed.

It has also been weight-tested and can take more than 25 stone.

‘This bed was made for a good friend for her daughters, and they absolutely love it with hours of fun,’ says Wayne.

‘The bed costs around £200 to build depending on how many colours you use and design.

‘To build the bed, it took about five days from beginning to end. I’ve designed the bed to be flat pack. 

‘The stairs, slide, front and back are separate sections, which is ideal for moving around.

‘Once the bed is made and all the holes are filled it’s all sanded down and has three coats of paint to give it its lovely finish. 

‘I’ve used about 300 screws in the bed which some people will find it hard to believe as you don’t see most of them.’

The amazing bunk bed is just one of Wayne’s inventive creations, and he loves dreaming up each new project and seeing the build through. 

‘Over the years I have built many unique things, ranging from garden planters to a complete bedroom set consisting of a double bed, wardrobes with overhead storage and a vanity table,’ he adds.

‘I like to think up new and exciting designs to try and I am excited to see how my next project will turn out.’

We’re just wondering if Wayne would be up for making an adult-sized version of this brilliant bed.

Do you have a story to share? We want to hear from you.

Get in touch: metrolifestyleteam@metro.co.uk.

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Keeping your house clean isn’t just a nice thing to do for any guests you might be having over – particularly in the current climate!

Maintaining good household hygiene can not only protect you and your loved ones from harmful bacteria and viruses, but it can help sustain the quality of a number of items in your home too. 

One such item that will benefit from a regular clean is your mattress. It may not be the first thing that springs to mind when you’re thinking of things to wash – or you may think that simply changing the sheets on a regular basis is enough – but keeping your mattress clean is more important than you think.

With the help of TEMPUR®, we reveal why you need to take care of your mattress, and how to do it right:

The importance of mattress cleanliness

It may seem like a big job, but keeping your mattress clean is actually pretty easy – which is good, because doing so is good for your health as well as that of your mattress.

In fact, one of the best things you can do to keep your mattress clean and fresh is to invest in one that does the hard work for you.

A TEMPUR® mattress can help you maintain a fresh bed without as much manual labour.

They come with a removable cover that’s machine-washable at 60 degrees, making it quick and easy to keep your bed and mattress hygienically clean. As well as adding another layer of comfort to your bed, the cover also offers protection that will maintain the health of your mattress, and even you.

This is important because while you are (hopefully) cleaning your sheets regularly, and maybe even giving your duvet and pillows a wash too, your mattress is still holding everything that it’s come into contact with.

That means the average 285ml of sweat that most adults produce every night is still in your mattress, along with a toe-curling number of dead skin cells and detritus from any snacks you may have been enjoying between the sheets. It’s a bit gross when you think about it.

Looking after your mattress and investing in one with removable, washable covers will prevent these things from building up, which will help to discourage dust mites and bed bugs from making themselves at home in your bed, and can also alleviate allergies. 

Not only that, but a regular blitz will keep bad smells at bay and help care for your respiratory health, which makes for a more restorative night sleep. And, let’s face it, there is nothing more satisfying than a good night’s rest, is there?

Health benefits aren’t the only advantage of a clean mattress, though. Making the effort to care for your mattress and air it regularly will help it remain in as good-as-new condition for its recommended eight-year life span. Now, considering that mattresses are an investment for most people, it’s definitely worthwhile to take good care of it.

OK, so how should I clean my bed?

Cleaning your bed and mattress sounds like a big job, but it’s actually surprisingly easy.

Firstly, you want to strip off all your bedding and use a vacuum cleaner to clean under and around your bed to remove dust and allergens. On the occasion that you do find any nasty stains on your TEMPUR® mattress, it’s best to refer to the care label, as you may need to treat them in a specific way so as not to void your warranty or damage the material. As the covers on the mattress are machine washable, you probably won’t need to do this very often.

However, assuming it is safe to do so, there are a number of mild solutions you can use to dab stains out. A diluted mixture of washing up liquid and water, bicarbonate of soda and water or a special mattress cleaner can all be used to gently sponge stains away – just make sure you don’t get the mattress too wet otherwise it won’t dry properly and may smell again.

Once you’ve laundered your bedding and it’s ready to put back on your bed, think about using two covers on your pillows to create an extra barrier between you and the pillow itself. TEMPUR® pillows from the classic and ergonomic range all come with covers as standard, which are machine washable up to 60°C. Use these underneath a cover which matches your bedding for added comfort and longer-lasting freshness.

Maintaining a clean mattress

So, whether you’ve just breathed some new hygienic life into your mattress or have treated yourself to a lovely new TEMPUR® one, you’re probably wondering how to keep it in this tip-top condition.

With your TEMPUR® mattress and cover, this should be straightforward, and you’ll rarely need to go to the lengths of a thorough deep clean.

But the answer does vary from person to person. If you are prone to allergies, or have a habit of sloppily eating your tea and biscuits in bed, consider a deep clean about once a month. Otherwise, at least once every six months should be ample.

Actual cleaning isn’t the only way to keep your mattress, well, clean. For example, when you get up in the morning, don’t make the bed straight away. Instead, throw back the covers and give your mattress a chance to air before tucking everything into place; this will help any moisture build up from your sleep evaporate. If you can open a window to get some fresh air in too, even better.

In addition to regularly washing your sheets, it might be worth discouraging cats, dogs, rabbits and all manner of other furry friends from getting into bed with you. As lovely as it is to snuggle up with your pet, you can’t be 100 per cent sure about where they’ve been and what they might bring with them beneath the covers.

Simon Cowell may have the bigger bank balance, but I had the name first. Only just, mind you. 

Up until the early 2000s, I thought I was the only one.

I had been presenting programmes about wildlife since the 1980s and by 1996 I had a series called Wildlife SOS with Channel 5, which ran for 18 years. 

Ricky Gervais once said I’m like David Attenborough, but with tourettes. 

I think it’s why, when the other Simon came to be really well known after Pop Idol, I just took it in my stride. I’m the first Simon, after all. 

Even when he became more famous than me, I’ve never felt bitter.

Especially because I really like the guy. I’ve never met him – although I have tried to get in touch a few times as it would be lovely to meet – but I think we’re pretty similar characters with really similar interests.

While the entertainment mogul might get a lot of flack for the scathing criticism he gives acts on shows like X Factor and Britain’s Got Talent, I just see him as honest. I am too. I am what I am and I say it how I see it.

He also believes in the power of music, which is something I whole-heartedly agree with.

Growing up, I had the most horrible stutter but I could sing. I would join choirs and take part in school musicals. I get a lot of pleasure from music and I always thought I would get into it professionally. But I’m of the belief that life tracks a path for you and you make decisions day by day that shape your existence.

I occasionally think that I could, very easily, have gone down a similar road as my namesake.

And with his tremendous empathy for animals – he’s campaigned with PETA and given huge sums to animal rescue charities – he could easily be where I am today too. 

I now run one of the biggest wildlife hospitals in the UK, which I founded in 1980. The Wildlife Aid Foundation started with two or three volunteers and now there are over 370. 

It’s my work with animals that got me an MBE in 2006. It was a very heartwarming experience, but I knew I would have never been able to get one without all the charity’s amazing volunteers. 

When they asked me if I wanted to go to the palace to receive the honour, I instead asked for them to present it at our headquarters in Leatherhead. It was for all of us. 

At the time, I remember my friends seeing ‘Simon Cowell’ on the Honours List and assuming it was the other Simon Cowell. I got a few texts saying, ‘I bet you wish that was you.’ Until I was awarded it I couldn’t tell anyone it actually was me!

I reckon it was probably worse for him when he didn’t get one! I hope he’s not sulking. 

There have been a number of times we’ve been confused though. I’ve definitely been booked in to give a few talks where they obviously assumed they were getting him.

No one mentioned anything but the look on their faces gave it away – and I wasn’t about to bring it up! 

I’ve received fan mail meant for him; a few drawings of ‘me’ and lots of CDs from music hopefuls thinking I can rocket them to stardom. 

It’s always useful when I try to book a restaurant. There are never any questions until I show up. We look nothing alike, and my usual get up doesn’t involve a V-neck T-shirt and tight blue jeans. 

Clearly being Simon Cowell comes with a lot of benefits – but I would never swap my life for his. The only thing I would want is his chequebook! If I had it I would just spend it on doing more of what I do with wildlife. 

We’re currently working on one of the biggest rescues we’ve done in a long time. There’s a swan stuck in a massive lake with a hook in its mouth. We’ve already visited it three times but the lake is so vast we’ve had real issues getting to it. 

This time, a swarm of us are going to remove the hook. Without being seen, the swan won’t be able to eat, so it is a race against time.

Having to go out four times is really frustrating, but fortunately it’s rare as on most occasions we are able to save the animal on the first visit. 

I will whinge every day about everything that we have to do, but I wouldn’t change it for the world. 

In my job you really have to think on your feet and my days are never planned. I never plan anything. 

When I was very young, I thought I would be a vet but unfortunately I didn’t have the academic qualifications needed. All my relatives were farmers, so I went to agricultural college with the view to doing the same.

Instead, I went on to be a commodity broker in London for 23 years. I had a nervous breakdown in 1994, which is when I decided to leave London and dedicate all my time to the charity. 

I don’t regret not doing it sooner as I know I had to do what I had to do, and go through what I did, to get to where I am today. That’s just how life is – and I’m sure the other Simon Cowell will have been through his own ups and downs. 

All in all, sharing a name with him hasn’t been too bad. I’d love to one day meet him and shake his hand.

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In the past few months, we’ve seen an extra spotlight on the way Black people are constantly policed, even when they’re just minding their business.

While no one should be afraid to walk around their own neighbourhood, one Black man revealed why he would never do this simple act.

Best-selling author and TEDx speaker Shola Richards explained that he was frightened of walking through his white-dominated area by himself.

The dad revealed he always takes his daughter or his dog for a walk to show that he’s a family man who is a resident of the area, lest anyone should have any suspicions.

His stark reality is part of the experience of living while Black, which is finally getting some attention in the mainstream.

Facebook users were shocked by Shola’s admission and said they’d be happy to walk with him as an ally.

Shola’s explanation resonated with many as the post blew up, amassing half a million shares.

He wrote: ‘I would be scared to death to take these walks without my girls and my dog. In fact, in the four years living in my house, I have never taken a walk around my neighborhood alone (and probably never will).

‘This is my reality. When I’m walking down the street holding my young daughter’s hand and walking my sweet fluffy dog, I’m just a loving dad and pet owner taking a break from the joylessness of crisis homeschooling.’

He continued: ‘But without them by my side, almost instantly, I morph into a threat in the eyes of some white folks.

‘Instead of being a loving dad to two little girls, unfortunately, all that some people can see is a 6’2” athletically-built black man in a cloth mask who is walking around in a place where he doesn’t belong (even though, I’m still the same guy who just wants to take a walk through his neighbourhood).

‘It’s equal parts exhausting and depressing to feel like I can’t walk around outside alone, for fear of being targeted.’

Shola also shared six different tips for white people to be anti-racist, including some practical steps they can take.

Some of the advice includes speaking up with friends and family s and realising that racism isn’t just limited to ‘Make America Great Again’ supporters.

He also says people should realise that saying ‘all lives matter’ is tone-deaf and reductive.

The father-of-two noted that while the world works things out, he’ll continue to rely on his daughters to keep him safe, though usually it’s the other way around.

Shola isn’t alone in his fears. Many Black people have had the police called on them for something as simple as entering their own property.

Even grime star Stormzy has been subject to suspicion upon going into his own home.

Let’s hope the current conversation opens people’s eyes.

Do you have a story?

Email metrolifestyleteam@metro.co.uk to tell us more.

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