We know that giving our living space a good clean will likely make us feel better in the long run, but it’s tough to remember that at the start of the process, when we’re confronted by piles of clutter.
So here’s a reminder of why it’s worth the bother, in the hope that someone else’s story might help motivate you when the mess feels insurmountable.
Single mum Bex Kitchen, 25, was struggling with her mental wellbeing, having suffered with depression and anxiety for years.
The struggle of handling mental illness while working and raising a four-year-old alone meant Bex’s home became a ‘dumping ground’, and she simply didn’t have the energy to give it a good tidy.
Bex found it difficult to keep the room tidy while battling depression (Picture: Bex Kitchen)
But in lockdown and on furlough, Bex decided to take advantage of the extra time on her hands, as well as a lift in her mood, to sort out her home.
Bex told LatestDeals.co.uk: ‘I just really wanted to create a calm, jungle-themed bedroom. I am a single mum. I have a four-year-old and have wanted a second child for a really long time, so I’m considering adopting.
She took the decluttering process slowly and gently (Picture: Bex Kitchen)
‘However, for now, I’m just about to apply to Ofsted as a childminder after using lockdown to study childcare from home. This room will be where any minded babies I look after take their naps.
‘I’m autistic with anxiety and I’ve suffered from depression for a long time so the room ended up being a dumping ground and I didn’t have the energy or executive functioning to deal with it.
‘Now I’m coming out of depression, I want to get my life on track, especially as my fiancé left me in January, so I just decided one day it was now or never to take control of my life and that includes making my home somewhere I can truly enjoy and relax in.’
Then one day in lockdown, Bex did the bulk of the work – here’s the end result (Picture: Bex Kitchen)
Bex spent just £170 transforming the cluttered space in her home into a peaceful room for the kids she childminds, with a subtle jungle theme.
She was able to save cash by using some laminate flooring she had from a previous home, that had sat in the garage unused for two years, and looking out for bargains from Ikea and Hobbycraft.
‘So I only paid out £32.48 on tools and underlay for the floor,’ says the mum. ‘The cot was from when my son was a baby, and so was the bedding and curtains.
‘The drawers are Nordli from Ikea, the Kallax is from Ikea, the rug was Toftland and cost £7 from Ikea, and the trolley was £28 from Hobbycraft.
Along with a good tidy, Bex added some DIY touches (Picture: Bex Kitchen)
“The handmade clock was made by Emma Steel in Spalding who runs LightArtedly, the watercolour prints were from LauraSladeArt, the canvas map was from The Range and the embroidery hoop was from Rosie Wild at Phoenix and the Cub.
‘I’m a big believer of supporting small businesses so that’s what I’ve tried to do! Overall, if you add up all the furniture, flooring and art it was about £170 that I’ve spent this year on the room.’
Bex made the DIY project manageable by starting to declutter little by little a month ago, then doing one big day of tidying last week, when she had a surge in energy.
It’s lovely, right? (Picture: Bex Kitchen)
She says that the end result, as well as the journey of decluttering, has given her a mental health boost in a challenging time.
Bex added: ‘Decluttering was the hardest part but I had to be ruthless and throw out 70% of what was in the room,” she adds.
‘I think this project has given me something to focus on during lockdown and also improved my mental health.
‘Poor mental health can contribute to a messy house and then a messy house makes your mental health worse, in a vicious cycle.
‘So clearing up even just one room has made a big difference to my mood! Every time I walk past the room I smile.
‘Now that room is done, I feel energised to transform the rest of the house and so relieved too. It’s my favourite room in the house now.’
Your favourite food from M&S delivered by Ocado? A rare bit of good news in 2020 (Picture: Getty)
With coronavirus still changing many people’s idea of normal, home delivery slots for grocery shopping has become more important than ever so it’s exciting news that M&S are expanding their home delivery offerings with an official Ocado partnership.
Ocado has added thousands of M&S products to their site already, although they will show up as out-of-stock until the partnership goes live.
So… just when will that be?
When can you buy M&S food through Ocado?
From 1 September, M&S Food products will be available for delivery from Ocado.
This comes after the retail giant purchased 50% of Ocado’s UK retail arm for £750 million in 2019.
The M&S website states that Ocado is getting ready for the launch and that all M&S food products are available for customers to add to their baskets for delivery slots starting from 1 September.
Over 6,000 products are available to browse now so if you’re a fan of M&S food, it might be worthwhile booking your delivery slot sooner rather than later.
The products on offer will show as out of stock for the time being, but serve as a taster of what to expect when the partnership goes live.
How much does Ocado delivery cost?
If your order is less than £75, there’s a minimum charge of £2.99 and a maximum of £6.99.
For standard orders of £75 or more, you may be offered free delivery.
Not just food, M&S Food… delivered to your door (Picture: Getty Images)
You can also opt in for Ocado Smart Pass to potentially save on delivery fees.
The Smart Pass costs £10.99 per month but customers get unlimited free deliveries, can save at least 10% on some brands and get access to exclusive sales and discounts.
Smart Pass holders also get front-of-the-queue access for product samples among other benefits too.
Some of the suggestions to discuss before marriage (Picture: Saag Jaan/Twitter)
If you’ve agreed to get married, you probably think you know your partner pretty well.
But one woman’s list of 20 questions to ask before walking down the aisle has gone viral with many people picking up on some things they hadn’t considered.
Saag Jaan, 21, from California, was previously engaged but it ended before the wedding and she wanted to share some of the things she learned.
She told Metro.co.uk: ‘I engaged when I was 19 years old, but that ended due to irreconcilable differences because of my lack of commitment, educational ambitions and personal values.
‘I included what I thought was important from personal experience.’
Saag's thread in full
DONT GET MARRIED BEFORE: a thread
1. Talk about DEBT 2. FULLY and WILLINGLY committing to one another. No “im not sure” and “what if’s” and “its not the right time.” you are either in or you’re OUT.
3. When/how many kids yall want (adoption? are one of you infertile? etc.)
4. Talking about STDs. Get checked. Seek medical help/informed professional knowledge. Keep those tests up to date and find ways to do so even within the marriage.
5. Talk about your 5-10 year timeline regarding career/education. Can you move? Willingness to relocate? etc.
6. Levels of religiosity. Openness to growth? Lack Thereof? Do you share fundamental CORE beliefs about life? VERY important.
7. Anger managements issues: do one of you struggle? Are you in therapy for it/taking it out on others? Seek help, bc it will destruct you and the future and the children….
8. Energy. Does it match? you decide. Follow your gut
9. CLOTHING: it may seem like a small problem but small things eventually ADD up. Make sure your expectations MATCH one another to full comfort
10. Sexual compatibility. Not going to go into details, but yall need to be on the same playing field. Consent wise, willingness to try things, traumas, etc… figure it out.
11. Finances: how do you intend on splitting bills? Gender roles? Taking the parents in during old age? etc.
12. Age doesn’t matter too much. In my experience it’s about the person & what their world views are. If you are young, make sure the person you’re with will allow you to keep growing at your own pace and in your own way. It’s called respect.
13. Opposite gender boundaries. Set what’s okay. What’s not okay. Hugs/handshakes/etc. I know it sounds tribal & trust should be there but you’d be surprised what people’s boundaries are. Better to know than not know
14. Social media: believe it or not, people WILL break up over this. Some prefer privacy. Some not. Get on the same page or you’ll be clowning on one another.
15. I mentioned this before, but SAVINGS. How much do y’all have earned & combined? How much is your intended salaries? Is it sustainable? Apartment? House? Condos? Etc. speak futuristically if it’s not smthing u can afford right now. Get on the same page.
16. What is cheating? Entanglements? Define your breaks? Breakups? Etc.
17. Physical and verbal abuse: what is and isn’t considered abusive language and decorum? Seek help, please. Professionals can always step in.
18. What are your dying wishes? Burial proceedings? What if one of you becomes paralyzed? God parents? Uncertain events? Death? Speak it. Speak on all of it.
19. Importantly, LOVE is not what keeps relationships going. An active commitment to LOVE, despite the downfalls, keeps it going. Get out the princess-king happily ever after mindset and you’ll be fine
20. I want everyone to notice how I failed to mention level of education, family or tribal background, ethnicity, job level, & all. It’s because none of this matters in the long run. Trust. you ain’t a good person based off superficial attributes.
Saag covers everything from money to ethics to STDs and your five to 10 year career plan.
After posting the thread at the end of last month, people started to share it.
It now has over 220,000 likes and 61,000 retweets and comments.
Some commented saying they loved the list and they wanted to bookmark it for when it came to getting married.
One person said: ‘I seriously love this. You mentioned so many points that are beneficial to a relationship that so many people miss going over before getting married.’
Another said: ‘This is AMAZING advice !! Someone posted on a fb group I’m on and I came to find the full thread wow it’s a gold mine of information for singles.’
One response said: ‘As someone who’s been married for almost 16yrs your thread is sound and comprehensive.
‘Good to discuss all of these things keeping in mind perfect match is impossible and compromise is necessary – a wise thread from someone who looks young. Well done.’
The 21-year-old was previously engaged (Picture: Saag Jaan/Twitter)
But others weren’t so sure and called the thread a little reductive.
One tweet added:’Not to sound carefree or irresponsible, but checking on literally every single possible thing just to make sure everything goes right afterwards doesn’t guarantee you won’t have issues later on. Marriage has its own learning curve and teaches on-the-job. This isn’t a PhD thesis.’
Youâre right. But we minimize the damage as much as possible so this way, when people see fundamental flaws between each other they donât actively try to change the other person. They just leave beforehand.
Another person said they felt these were things most people would discuss anyway.
Her tweet said: ‘I do love this thread as is mentions many great points but surely people talk about half of these before even thinking of getting married? Like I wouldn’t even think of marrying my partner if I didn’t already know half of this stuff.’
But Saag pointed out that it might seem obvious but she felt it was important to flag it all and give people something to think about.
In response, she said: ‘A lot of times young people aren’t developed enough to talk about half the shit I mentioned. Sometimes within family and culture, women’s desires are not respected or even asked about. It’s important for both individuals to have full say and ownership of their title.’
Although the thread meant a lot to her, Saag wasn’t expecting the response she got.
She added: ‘I didn’t think it would blow up. I usually talk to the wall with my followers because my engagement is a huge part of my current identity.
‘My followers and I usually discuss it on the twitter platform as a healing mechanism. I had no idea people would resonate with my words of wisdom but I’m glad they can learn from my past experiences.’
This woman is 6ft 4 (Picture: MDWfeatures / @emerald.tallmodel)
A woman who is 6ft 4ins says she is inundated with DMs from men asking to ‘climb’ her.
Nutrition manager and model, Emerald Van Langen, from Toronto always hoped that she’d be as tall as her eldest sister, who stood at 6ft 3ins.
Fascinated with her height, Emerald swore off drinking fizzy drinks after hearing a rumour that these stunted your growth.
While it’s certainly a popular rumour, drinking soft drinks and caffeine doesn’t actually stunt growth, according to Teenshealth (though both should be moderated due to their other health effects).
In year nine, Emerald began to notice that she was growing at a much quicker rate than that of her friends.
Emerald, now 32, grew to 6ft 4ins tall – beating her sister by a single inch.
Whilst Emerald would later learn to embrace her height in her modelling career, certain everyday tasks got noticeably more difficult as Emerald grew taller – dating in particular.
The model says she always preferred shorter partners and her husband is 5ft 2ins.
Emerald is now a model (Picture: MDWfeatures / @emerald.tallmodel)
Emerald explained: ‘I’ve been with my husband for eleven years now and he’s 5ft 2ins tall. Before we met, I didn’t date much but I only dated shorter men – six feet and under – when I did.
‘Taller men would always seem to be nervous about me being taller than them.
‘I do receive some inappropriate DMs. Some just ask me to stand next to a door but some want me to post kinky videos.
‘Someone once messaged me saying ‘I’d climb you for a f***.’
When she was younger, Emerald found that smoking and drinking caffeine could stunt growth so she stayed away from both.
She said: ‘I put more effort into not drinking any caffeine as I wanted to be taller than my sister and it paid off. Whether that’s down to genetics or my efforts is unknown.
‘I used to feel a bit awkward in school. I would often bend down to fit in pictures – and still do. Everyone joked that the basketball coach would ask me to be a part of the team, but they never did.’
She struggled to make it in modelling as the clothes and shoes were too small for her (Picture: MDWfeatures / @emerald.tallmodel)
‘Clothes shopping has become easier now that I know which stores sell longer sizes. When I went wedding dress shopping, I had to have a seamstress drop the skirt so it was longer.
‘Apartment hunting is the worst experience. My first question is how high are the ceilings which landlords always seem to lie about.
‘Strangers sometimes shout “how tall are you?”, which bothers me. It’s more decent to come over and talk instead.’
Her husband is 5ft 2 (Picture: MDWfeatures / @emerald.tallmodel)
Emerald is now spending more time focusing on her modelling career.
But casting directors often deemed Emerald to be ‘too tall.’ It wasn’t until she started freelancing and finding her own work that Emerald found her niche.
‘I started taking a modelling class when I was sixteen which taught me to stand up straight and be more elegant,’ Emerald said.
‘I got a paid gig but my hips and feet were too big to fit into their sample sizes so I gave modelling up for a few years.
‘Now, I’m falling in love with it again and I’ve started working out, and building up my strength. I love meeting new people and travelling to new places on the job.
‘Being tall has its benefits. I have more storage space so I can eat more. Most importantly – no stools or ladders needed.’
Lindt plans to unveil a vegan range in time for Christmas (Picture: Lindt/Metro.co.uk)
Good news, vegans and dairy-free pals: Lindt is joining the plant-based hype to deliver a new range of vegan treats.
The brand behind those near-addictive Lindor truffles, Lindt & Sprungli, will release a new line of vegan chocolate bars in time for Christmas.
Sadly this line will not include those aforementioned truffles, instead comprising of chocolate bars in three flavours: cookie, hazelnut, and salted caramel.
The chocolate bars will be made with oat milk, making them free from both dairy and lactose, and no animal products will be used.
The bars will also be wrapped in fully recyclable packaging, which should win some extra points from the eco-conscious crowd.
The vegan bars will be available in three flavours, all made with oat milk (Picture: Lindt)
But before you start hungering too desperately for those sweet vegan eats, we must warn you that the vegan Lindt bars, as part of the brand’s Hello collection, will only be available in Germany by November, not in the UK.
Maybe if the reaction is overwhelmingly positive, they’ll look at rolling out the launch globally, but we can’t make any promises.
Of course, these mystical bars aren’t the only vegan chocolate on the market.
Seed and Bean does some excellent dark chocolate bars that happen to be vegan, while Divine’s Smooth Dark With Pink Himalayan Salt is a delight.
We also like the vegan ginger bar from Green & Black’s.
If you prefer a bar from a supermarket-own brand, M&S and Waitrose both do vegan dark chocolate too.
Bobby Moore now makes £5,000 a week by posting on TikTok (Picture: Yoke Network)
Like many 17-year-olds, Bobby Moore’s plans were turned upside down when his exams were cancelled due to the coronavirus pandemic.
He decided to throw himself into making TikTok videos and build up the followers on his account @BobbyMoore44, which he set up at the end of October last year.
Now, Bobby, from Southend, Essex, has 5.2 million followers and earns £5,000 a week on brand deals, thanks to his short informative fact videos.
He’s due to go back to school in September and Bobby plans to throw himself back into studying A-levels in maths, economics, physics and politics.
But once he finishes school, he will take a gap year and use his earnings from Tiktok to build a property portfolio and trade on the foreign exchange market, after spending some of his time over the last few months learning all about it.
The teen explained: ‘With TikTok, anyone can blow up. You can go from being a nobody to something in a very quick amount of time.
‘I’ve just been doing videos in my bedroom since December, so nothing’s really changed in lockdown. But it feels good to have so many people enjoying my videos.’
He came up with his trademark style of bringing random facts alive by talking into a tiny microphone while pictures appear in the background when he was just messing about in his bedroom.
Bobby explained: ‘I was just trying new ideas, and I stumbled across the informative format with the microphone and for some reason, it just blew up. I think it’s because I condense the information and concentrate on interesting stuff – at least in my opinion!
Bobby has spent lockdown building up his followers (Picture: Yoke Network)
‘When I share uplifting stuff – it’s so nice to get that message out to so many people. Some people have even messaged me to say that I’ve made their lockdown or that I’ve helped them through a really bad time. And that just makes me want to make more videos.
‘It’s amazing to see that you have an actual effect on real, actual people. That makes you feel so good.’
Bobby makes his money on TikTok through brand collaborations organised influencer network Yoke.
He’s already had work with leading companies including the banking app Revolut and group video chat app for gamers Bunch.
His dream collaborations would be with River Island and Hugo Boss, his favourite clothing brands.
He makes the videos in his bedroom (Picture: Yoke Network )
He will head back to school in a few weeks but will keep up his videos alongside his studies and then he has big plans for his gap year.
He wants to grow TikTok to 7 million followers and then go into the buy-to-let property business with his father, who runs hairdressing colleges, to set himself up for the future.
Bobby explained: ‘I’m taking a gap year to grow these platforms, because it’s a once-in-a-lifetime thing – once I’m older, I won’t have much of a following. Right now, I have to use it. This opportunity isn’t going to come around again – it’s not going to last forever.’
Throughout his rise, his parents and his two older sisters Danielle, 21, who works for a law firm and Olivia, 26, an executive producer, have been a huge support.
Bobby said: ‘I was showing them the first video that got 2 million views as the figures were going up, and they were like ‘what is going on?’
‘Then we had the chat that the more followers you have, the more responsibility you have. They said it’s important not to put out any irresponsible content because you don’t want anything to affect your future career away from TikTok, so I’ve taken that approach from the start.’
Bobby does get some negative comments online but doesn’t let it affect how much he is enjoying his current success.
He said: ‘There’s always haters but I find it quite funny – I don’t let it get to me. I just keep spreading positive energy.’
Of course, he’s not the first Bobby Moore to gain notoriety.
Despite sharing a name with the late footballer, he doesn’t like the sport himself but he said it does come up in his comments.
He laughed: ‘I do get it mentioned quite a lot. But with younger kids on TikTok, they only know me, and not the football legend Bobby Moore.
‘That’s when all my mates get annoyed – they obviously put him at number one!’
Large numbers (up to 64%) of patients said they’d had TE during or after having coronavirus, with varying degrees of hair loss.
Regardless of whether you’ve had coronavirus or not, it’s enough to make you worry every time you clean your hairbrush.
But, fear not, hair loss is very common and there are lots of reasons it might happen.
The average person loses around 100 hairs a day, which looks like a lot if it’s all together in a brush or plughole. But that’s just part of the natural renewal process of our scalp and follicles.
Even if it is above and beyond this 100 number, though, remember that there’s usually nothing to worry about. 50% of men and 25% of women will experience hair loss by the time they’re 50, so you’re not alone.
Some of the reasons this might happen are as follows.
If you suspect that your hair loss might be related to a deficiency, the best thing to do is speak to your GP or go to a hair loss clinic.
They’ll be able to give you a blood test and remedy the deficiency to hopefully get your hair back to its former thickness – as well as ensuring that any other health complications due to your deficiency are addressed.
Hair falling out is often a symptom of something else (Picture: Ella Byworth for Metro.co.uk)
Infections
A number of infections – like ringworm, folliculitis, and seborrheic dermatitis – can make the hair look thinner or cause pattern hair loss.
If this is the case, the hair issues should clear up when the infection is dealt with.
This may be in the form of creams, tablets or shampoos.
Traction alopecia
Nicola Smart Consultant Trichologist from Smart Hair Clinic calls traction alopecia ‘hair loss resulting from extreme hairdressing practices.’
Wearing hair in braids or other tight styles or using harsh chemicals on the scalp can damage the follicles and cause hair to fall.
You can normally tell the difference between this type of hair loss, as your hair won’t thin overall or in random spots, rather it will be in the areas where the scalp has been pulled or damage.
You may also find that there are small spots or blisters that pop up before the hair falls out.
The main prevention and treatment of this type of hair loss is to change your hairstyle regularly. So if you normally wear a tight bun or a specific type of braids, switch it up or loosen the style.
If you are also experiencing spots or blisters, speak with your GP, as they might want to prescribe you a shampoo or cream.
It’s always best to speak to a professional (Picture: Ella Byworth for Metro.co.uk)
It can come about slowly or be a sudden loss, and can affect the hair on your head or eyebrows, eyelashes, or other hair.
Other conditions like lupus, Hashimoto’s disease, rheumatoid arthiritis, or Crohn’s disease can also affect the hair follicles.
Apart from in the case of alopecia areata, hair loss is likely to be one of multiple symptoms of an autoimmune coditions.
If you’re worried abut hair loss speak to your GP who’ll be able to investigate the cause further.
Medication
Certain medications – including those for the above autoimmune conditions – can contribute to hair loss.
Typically your hair growth will go back to normal after you stop the drugs or your body gets used to them.
However, if you’re worried about hair loss as a side effect, check with the doctor when they’re prescribed or when you go for a check-up.
Age-related pattern baldness
As we age, some people may go completely bald whereas others will see their hair thin, often from the front backwards.
This is normally something called androgenic alopecia, which is the hereditary type of hair loss that occurs gradually, although it may happen to some people earlier than others depending on genetics.
Unfortunately this type of hair loss isn’t preventable. If you’d prefer to look into hair treatments or other cosmetic treatments, you can visit a hair loss clinic.
Although hair loss is so common – and in many cases harmless – if you’re finding that the change in your appearance is affecting your mental health, you should definitely speak to a doctor.
Trying a new pill often means holding our breath and praying that it doesn’t dominate our minds (Picture: Ella Byworth)
I used to swear by the contraceptive pill.
Up until 2019, I was taking a version called Loestrin, and had done for five years. It wasn’t simply to avoid pregnancy; I have adenomyosis, a condition where the lining of the uterus breaks through the muscle wall and causes painful periods.
Loestrin was brilliant: it took away the pain and enabled me to manage my cycle. But when I went to collect my prescription in October, I opened the packet to find I’d been given a different pill – Microgynon – instead.
The pharmacy explained that Loestrin had stopped being manufactured, so my GP must have given me a different brand.
I panicked. I had been told by a gynaecologist to try Loestrin specifically because its make up was best suited to manage my adenomyosis. I had become dependent on it to control my symptoms, but now I was faced with a pill that my body wasn’t used to – and one that I had no evidence would work for my condition.
Contraceptive pills are not interchangeable, yet too often they are prescribed as if they are. One version gets swapped for another on the basis that it’s ‘close enough’ to its previous counterpart.
Microgynon, Yasmin, Cilest, Mercilon, Femodette – the list of names goes on, not to mention the combined pill versus progesterone-only; the 21 day pill over the one you swallow every day.
But anyone who has ever taken the pill will be able to tell you the vital truth: oral contraceptives vary, and when this fact is casually disregarded, women pay the price.
Changing from one pill to another requires the body to adjust to the new components. The combined contraceptive pill contains artificial versions of oestrogen and progesterone at varying levels and this can cause women to suffer when swapping from one to another, with side effects ranging from nausea and headaches to an increased risk of developing blood clots and breast cancer.
Beyond the potential physical side effects, I was also petrified of the psychological risks. The advisory leaflet that comes with Microgynon states that some women ‘have reported depression or depressed mood. Depression can be serious and may sometimes lead to suicidal thoughts.’ Trying a new pill often means holding our breath and praying that it doesn’t dominate our minds.
This was enough to make up my mind, and I refused to take Microgynon. I rang my GP to explain, only for them to suggest another option: Rigevidon.
Feeling increasingly frustrated, I reiterated that I wasn’t comfortable being prescribed a pill I knew nothing about.
It can take years to find the ‘right’ pill – and the wrong one can make women feel more out of control than ever
It was only when I went to see my GP in person that I finally felt listened to. Together, we discussed a fourth version called Gedarel, something I still take to this day.
While I have had no side effects, so far it has done little to control the symptoms that caused me to take the contraceptive pill in the first place. After years spent trying to manage pain and symptoms, it’s hard not to feel like I’m back at square one.
There is a lack of understanding, consideration and compassion towards how sensitive women’s bodies are to the hormonal changes that each pill brings. The very fact my GP didn’t alert me to the switch in my medication suggests that I wasn’t considered as a woman with a specific medical history, but rather someone needing a quick fix of contraception.
In February this year, we heard reports of the shortage of all contraceptive pills across the UK with no clear reason as to why. Pills were being discontinued suddenly, and women were being asked to take something completely different.
Then Covid-19 hit. Recommendations published during lockdown by the Royal College of Obstetricians and Gynaecology and Faculty of Sexual and Productive Healthcare noted that, due to the pandemic, access to contraception in GP practices and contraceptive clinics had been ‘significantly reduced’ with many centres ‘shutting down’. What was already a difficult situation became almost impossible for some.
The original purpose of the pill was to allow women to finally take control of their bodies and it has positively impacted millions in the 59 years since it launched in the UK, helping women to manage their periods, regulate hormones and keep them from getting pregnant without having to rely on a partner.
Yet the reality is that it can take years to find the ‘right’ pill – and the wrong one can make women feel more out of control than ever.
There needs to be further clarity about how each pill is different. For example: while Loestrin 30 and Rigevidon 30 both contain 30 micrograms of oestrogen, they have different types of progesterone. Loestrin contains norethisterone acetate, while Rigevidon contains levonorgestrel.
My experience is just one of many. Forty-two per cent of UK women who use contraception rely on the pill and they are being put at risk by these shortages, stoppages and switches.
We need answers as to what caused the shortfall, as well as solutions and plans to prevent it happening again.
It’s not good enough that we are still being told ‘if this pill doesn’t agree with you, you can just try another’. It’s time-consuming, worrying and frustrating.
Hormones are not supposed to be messed with so carelessly, and women deserve better.
Do you have a story you’d like to share? Get in touch by emailing platform@metro.co.uk.
They spent $25,000 on the modern moving home (Picture: @tryshka/Jam Press)
Tiny homes were the thing to have, that is before lockdown meant we were all longing for space and creature comforts in our flats and houses.
Trysh and Saul Martinez have found the perfect solution for that, though, building a tiny home that’s also on wheels, so they can move around and be part of nature as well as saving money and space.
Trysh, 31, and her husband Saul, 32, both from Southern California, began building their home in August of 2018 using materials purchased locally in their area.
The incredible home came in at $25,000 (£19,272), and has given them the chance to pursue their careers as rehabilitation therapists.
The home can be moved as their jobs move (Picture: Jam Press)
Speaking to Jam Press, Trysh explained, ‘My husband and I both have student loans and we didn’t want to take out any more loans or a mortgage or pay for ongoing rent.
‘The financial reasons were reinforced by our plans to be travel rehab therapists, like travel nurses, but rehabilitation therapists who work for 13-week hospital contracts all over the country.
The space is compact yet efficient (Picture: Jam Press)
‘By living tiny, we are seeking financial freedom and a more conscious and purposeful living with less material things to focus on the more important aspects in life.’
The only help the couple had in the project was with specialist bits like electrics and plumbing. Everything else – from the structure to the decorating – was all DIY.
Despite being a tiny home, there’s still a lot going on in terms of decor (Picture: Jam Press)
‘Saul did a lot of research and planning based on other YouTube videos,’ Trysh said.
‘He had a general sense of the design plan, like dividing the house areas: kitchen, living area, bedroom loft, bathroom, storage loft, but the details of the build were build-as-you-go to adapt based on what materials we could find for reduced costs.’
Not much headroom, but enough for a cuddle (Picture: Jam Press)
As well as getting a brand new home from the project, Trysh also says that it helped strengthen the couple’s relationship.
She said: ‘We got to see each other’s strengths and weaknesses. I personally saw Saul’s character through the ups and downs of the build.
And loads of storage space (Picture: Jam Press)
‘I was able to first hand see his tenacity, patience, and calm demeanour even in the most stressful moments, as well as his quick problem solving, resourcefulness, and very effective budgeting.’
The transformation didn’t come without its challenges though, as Trysh admits, ‘Looking for land and the thought of having to move abruptly is pretty stressful.’
The structure was built entirely by Saul and Trysh (Picture: Jam Press)
‘Tiny house city ordinances in San Diego have recently changed and they are more lenient for allowing tiny houses now, but prior to that, we felt like we were walking on eggshells and feared having to move or getting cited by the city.
‘Should we decide to move, it would take another long and thorough search to find the perfect land we could park at and that makes the mobility aspect tougher in reality.’
Light colours keep the space airy and flowing (Picture: Jam Press)
For anyone else thinking of building their dream home on wheels, Trysh advises, ‘Do your research, watch YouTube videos, ask other DIY tiny house builders, and look into all the different ways and approaches you could do to maximise your budget, time and space while making it as custom and unique as you’d want your house to be.
‘Identifying your priority areas – the areas you anticipate will be most frequently used in the house – always helps in deciding square footage and amenities.’
For Trysh and Saul, however, those hours of studying and building were 100% worth it.
Trysh says: ‘I actually still find myself in awe looking at the littlest and the biggest details, remembering how he built every single piece of the house as we are now living in it.’
Keep your baby happy in the heat this week (Picture: Getty)
Parts of England are set for some exceptionally hot weather this weekend, with temperatures forecast to reach highs of 37 degrees.
This has led to the Met Office issuing amber alert health warnings across the south, southeast, and southwest of England.
Though many might be excited about catching some rays, anyone with babies knows that hot weather can be challenging for them.
Here’s how to keep babies cool during a heatwave, and how to keep them safe in the sun…
Keeping your baby safe from sunlight
According to the NHS, babies younger than 6 months old should be kept out of direct sunlight.
Their skin doesn’t contain enough melanin for it be protected from the sun.
The NHS adds that babies older than 6 months should still be kept out of the sun as much as possible, particularly if it’s excessively hot – like this weekend’s forecast heatwave – and between 11am and 3pm, when the sun is at its strongest.
If you go out when it’s hot, attach an umbrella, parasol or other type of sunshade to your baby’s pram to keep them out of direct sunlight.
You must also apply a sunscreen with an SPF of at least 30, and check that the product protects against both UVA and UVB rays.
If your child is older and will be playing, make sure to apply the suncream regularly.
Suncream will help protect your little ones skin – and yours! Don’t forget to put some on yourself (Picture: Getty)
How to keep babies from dehydrating – should babies be given water?
Fully breastfed babies do not need any water until they’ve started eating solids.
During hot weather they may want to breastfeed more than usual.
If you’re bottle feeding, as well as their usual milk feeds, you can give your baby a little cooled boiled water.
Ice lollies are a good way of keeping hydrated (Picture: Getty)
Between 6 and 12 months, once you have started to introduce solid foods, you can offer your baby sips of water from a cup or beaker with meals.
Breastmilk or infant formula should be their main drinks during the first year.
For older children, water should be their main drink during hot weather.
You can also give them frozen lollies made from plain water or from very diluted fruit juice to help keep them hydrated.
Keeping your baby and babies room cool in a heatwave
As well as keeping them out of the sun, you’ll need to keep their temperatures down.
Never wake a sleeping baby – and don’t let the heat do it either (Picture: Getty)
One way of doing this if you have a garden is to get out a paddling pool and keep it in a shaded area.
The NHS states that a baby will sleep best when their room is between 16 and 20 degrees, so for a good night sleep for the both of you, keep the blinds drawn during the day to keep the sun out.
Consider using a fan to keep the room cool – and the cost of running a fan might not be as high as you’d think.
Keep bedclothes to a minimum during hot weather – if your baby is fussing and kicking the covers off them, you can put them in just a nappy with a well-secured sheet that will not come loose and cover their face or get tangled.
Use your eyes to show your expression when wear a mask (Picture: Getty/Metro.co.uk)
Tyra Banks made the smize famous but it’s something that’s suddenly become much more relevant.
With face masks mandatory in shops, public transport and other indoor spaces, you might face a few awkward moments.
Covering your mouth means it might look like you are just staring someone out when you’re just trying to show your gratitude for moving out of the way.
You need to put a little more thought into your facial expressions to communicate your feelings.
But your eyes, in particular, are a great tool to show you are grinning under the mask.
Behaviour Therapist Anna Bessell at Improb explains that the easiest way to smile with your eyes is not to force it – your eyes will show your feelings if your smile is natural.
Anna tells Metro.co.uk: ‘The phrase, ‘I can see it in your eyes’, is not just an expression – it is actually fact. When someone, something or an event leads us to smile in a genuine manner, the orbicularis oculi pars lateralis crease. These are often referred to as laughter lines.
‘A genuine smile will encourage laughter lines, a smile that is not genuine will not see that the lines are dominant. Wearing a mask may disguise that your mouth is smiling however, people will see it in your eyes.’
Of course, if you’re struggling with a genuine smile in a moment that needs it, try quickly thinking of something that makes you happy.
Move your muscles
You might need to think carefully about the muscles you are moving to perfect the smize.
‘The best advice is to try to squint from the bottom of your eye. Just tighten those muscles right under your lower lid. The rest of your face should not change.’
Your eyebrows can also be used to show your facial expression – for example, a small eyebrow raise when you make eye contact with a stranger gives a sense of you saying hello or you can raise them to show excitement.
Tilting your head is another way to demonstrate your engagement with someone.
It might seem like you are in an exaggerated silent movie but it helps to give social cues if your mouth is covered.
Open body language
You need to use eye contact and body language too to communicate your feelings.
‘Body language speaks volumes,’ Anna adds.
‘If you are displaying a genuine smile but your arms are crossed or your eyeline is towards the floor, it is hard for people to see that you are smiling.
‘Where you can, adopt the same stance as the person you are communicating with. Keeping the same eyeline as them will also encourage them to acknowledge that you are smiling underneath the mask.’
Anna suggests using other parts of your body to show your smile too – for example, open arms and positive gestures like a thumbs up will show a more positive energy.
What weird stuff do kids want this year? (Picture: Getty/Argos/Metro.co.uk)
Already planning your Christmas shopping? Argos is here to help.
Is it vaguely horrifying to think of Christmas today, in the midst of a pandemic and in boiling hot weather?
Yes, yes it is. But on we must go, for the jingle bells of commercialism are ringing.
So for all parents anxiously working out what hyped up toys they’ll need to put in their children’s sticky paws, Argos has released their annual list of the top toys for the Christmas season.
Ready to see what puzzling bits kids desperately want this year? Here we go, starting from the most wanted.
So the dogs are the police force, and they need to catch dinosaurs? Again, don’t question it (Picture: Argos)
11. Poopsie Dancing Unicorn, £50 – launching this month
A unicorn that dances (Picture: Argos)
12. The Child Animatronic Edition, £45 – launching in October
The Child, better known as Baby Yoda (Picture: Argos)
You’ll spot some interesting toys on the list, including kids’ vlogging equipment and a, um, flamingo on the toilet.
Argos says time spent in lockdown has inspired nostalgia for familiar brands, too, with 50% of parents reminiscing about their old toys these last few months and 22% planning to give their children something that conjures memories of their own childhood this Christmas.
An animatronic doll of The Child from The Mandalorian – affectionately known as Baby Yoda, the diminutive star of the popular Star Wars spinoff that came to the Disney+ streaming service during lockdown – is expected to be one of this Christmas’s biggest hits. The doll moves (including its ears), gurgles and even ‘summons the Force’.
Nintendo and Lego have collaborated to release the Lego Adventures with Mario Starter Course, offering kids the chance to recreate the iconic platform games in physical form, collecting coins and squashing enemies.
The Little Live Pets Gotta Go Flamingo is an interactive flamingo that tells kids when it has to sit on its potty, while Poopsie launches the Dancing Unicorn, a new version of Poopsie Slime Surprise Unicorn – the pooping mythical creature that was one of the biggest hits of 2018.
There are familiar faces (and creatures) on this year’s list, with Toys from L.O.L. Surprise! and Paw Patrol making the list for a third and fourth year in a row, respectively.
Oh, and if you saw the news about Argos ditching its big catalogues, don’t panic – they say they’ll continue producing the printed Christmas gift guide regardless, so you can still do your usual circling-what-you-want process.
Juliet Ward, Head of Toy Buying at Argos, said: ‘With so much time spent inside during lockdown, the nation has rekindled its love for toys, turning to them now more than ever to keep themselves entertained during what has been a difficult time for many.
‘This year’s top toys list offers a huge variety of new products, ranging from toys inspired by the biggest TV and gaming franchises to bizarre – but crucially, fun – pooping animals.
‘When we craft the list of our top toy predictions for the year, we always try to accurately gauge the toy crazes that are set to make thousands of wish lists. This year it’s heartening to see so many toys that will encourage families to spend time together, whether that’s putting together a LEGO Lamborghini or reminiscing over the Mario games of the 80s and 90s.’
Toy expert Peter Jenkinson said: ‘Argos’s predictions for the top toys this Christmas are based on almost 50 years of experience and expertise in what parents buy for their children, offering not just a shopping list, but an insight into shopper behaviour and how the world around us affects what we buy.
‘You can see from the presence of an influencer studio kit and the animatronic doll that the lockdown has had a profound effect on what parents are set to purchase this year, while there are also toys – such as the LEGO Technic Lamborghini – that necessitate parents investing time in building the toy and playing alongside their children.
‘This year, children have spent much of their time locked away at home, unable to visit friends their own age and having birthday parties over Zoom. It’s meant a great deal of time has been spent with their immediate family, and while this is a good thing, the toy list also includes products that allow children to get back to simply being a kid – whether that’s a dancing unicorn or a flamingo that chirps about going to the toilet.’
… we have just discovered that said flamingo also eats his poop, so will need to take the rest of the day to think about this revelation.
Barbara Reed had tongue cancer at 31 (Picture: Barbara Reed)
Biting into a square of her favourite chocolate, Barbara Reed felt a tingle at the back of her tongue.
Biting into a square of her favourite chocolate, Barbara Reed felt a tingle at the back of the tongue.
She noticed a tiny mouth ulcer – something she’d never really had before.
Born in Switzerland but now living in Norfolk, Barbara loved the creamy sweet treat so didn’t want to miss out and she went to a pharmacist for some advice.
Despite over-the-counter treatments, followed by advice from her dentist and a hospital referral, the ulcer never went away.
At just 31, Barbara assumed it was just stress as she was busy running her business Breed Events Ltd and organising her upcoming wedding.
But shockingly, about three months after first noticing the tiny 5mm ulcer, she was told she had tongue cancer, which was treated by having a quarter of her tongue removed and then rebuilt using pieces of her arm.
Barbara, now 33, tells Metro.co.uk: ‘I noticed the ulcer but was sure it was just a minor thing. They’re really common. I didn’t want to make a fuss.
Barbara speaking for work in November 2018, with no idea she had tongue cancer (Picture: Barbara Reed)
‘It was tiny and the pain was quite sharp when I was eating sometimes but you could easily ignore it – I never thought it would be cancer.’
When she first found the ulcer, she went to a family friend who worked as a pharmacist.
A few weeks later, she returned and the friend recommended seeing a dentist, who told her it looked like two of her teeth were rubbing on the ulcer, preventing it from healing.
Barbara Reed (Picture: Barbara Reed)
After having some of her teeth filed down, she was told to return two weeks after that, but again, the ulcer didn’t get any better.
She says: ‘They were actually really apologetic at the dentist because it really looked like nothing but they said it was protocol to refer me to the hospital.
‘I went to the Norfolk and Norwich hospital and the doctor there wasn’t sure either. She said she would see me again in another few weeks.
‘Eventually, as it hadn’t gone away, they decided to do a biopsy to see what it was, which was done in mid December.’
Barbara and fiancé Nick who supported her throughout (Picture: Barbara Reed)
Due to get the results on December 31, once the swelling from the biopsy went down Barbara enjoyed Christmas, not giving too much thought to the upcoming hospital appointment.
When the day came, she attended with her fiancé Nick Fountain.
She said: ‘I was actually really relaxed about the appointment. My partner and I were even dozing off a bit as we were in the waiting room because we really didn’t think this was going to be anything sinister.
‘I went into the room and there were five people there and I thought that was a bit excessive.
Symptoms of mouth cancer
The symptoms of mouth cancer include:
mouth ulcers that are painful and do not heal within several weeks
unexplained, persistent lumps in the mouth or the neck that do not go away
unexplained loose teeth or sockets that do not heal after extractions
unexplained, persistent numbness or an odd feeling on the lip or tongue
sometimes, white or red patches on the lining of the mouth or tongue These can be early signs of cancer, so they should also be checked
‘The oral health consultant and surgeon started asking me questions about why I’d decided to get it checked out and eventually he just said: “It’s a really good job you did because it’s bad news – you have cancer.”’
She had MRI and CT scans, blood tests and x-rays and surgery to remove the tumour was then scheduled for 7 February 2019.
The huge 12-hour operation meant removing about 2cm by 3cm of tongue at the back, as well as some glands and lymph nodes in her neck as a precaution.
Barbara just before her surgery (Picture: Barbara Reed)
They then cut along her arm to remove some of the fat and tissue for her new tongue and an artery to create a transplant.
They then took skin from her leg to create a graft for her arm. Barbara was warned that as each person’s tongue is unique, there was no way to tell what impact the surgery would have on her speech and ability to eat.
She says: ‘I am really chatty and public speaking is a part of my work so talking is a huge part of my identity. The risks were a big thing to come to terms with but this was the best treatment.
‘My medical team were amazing and I felt taken care of. I trusted them completely.’
Barbara after surgery (Picture: Barbara Reed)
Luckily, when she came round from the surgery, she was immediately able to speak and has not needed any speech therapy.
Although the operation was successful, there has been a long-term impact on her life.
She says: ‘That part of my tongue is lame and sometimes food will get stuck. I don’t really like people watching me eating as sometimes it involves sticking my fingers in my mouth.
‘It took a long time for recovery in my arm. It had a big impact on the movement in my arm but hopefully, over time, the skin will loosen and it will improve.
Her arm after surgery (Picture: Barbara Reed)
‘In the grand scheme of things, I do feel like I had a lucky escape. When they took the cancer out, they analysed it and they found that it was a spider tumour, which spreads quickly and is very aggressive.
‘I was very lucky to find it when it was a matter of months old.’
The results showed that there was a small amount of spread into a lymph node and she was given the option of radiotherapy or to take a watch and wait approach with check ups every six weeks.
Barbara says: ‘Radiotherapy onto the tongue comes with a lot of risks and I felt that as I have beaten the odds to retain my speech the first time, I might not do that again. I decided to go for the check ups.
Her arm as it healed (Picture: Barbara Reed)
‘It’s been a year and a half now and the odds of something still being there are low.’
But living with cancer and going through treatment has affected her mental health and she was diagnosed with post traumatic stress disorder earlier this year.
She said: ‘That has been difficult because there has been help available for anything physical but not as much for the mental aspects. I have had funded therapy, which started just before lockdown and I have progressed quite well.
‘The problem now is that I have two sessions left and then the funding stops but I feel I need to continue with it.’
The scar left on her neck (Picture: Barbara Reed)
One of the things that surprised her most was the lack of support for self-employed people going through treatment for cancer.
‘I have been encouraged by schemes to go and be an entrepreneur, to create opportunities for myself and others,’ she told us.
‘I know that most people who take those risks won’t end up with a cancer diagnosis, but as I’m navigating my way back to a life after cancer, there is just very little support.
‘I knew that once I was well, I would continue to drive my business forward. I may have had cancer, but I am still of value and have something to offer. But I need the right support to get there.
Barbara needs regular check ups but the surgery removed the cancer (Picture: Barbara Reed)
‘It feels like I am being punished for being ambitious, having a positive outlook and enough grit between my teeth to push through pain both physically and mentally in order to function.
‘Only because I look fine, doesn’t mean I don’t need help.’
Barbara was just about to return to work when the coronavirus pandemic hit and she admits it has been a real financial struggle.
She says: ‘I was just starting back and then all my work disappeared due to Covid. It was a blessing in disguise, looking back, because I didn’t realise how bad the PTSD was at that point, but I’ve fallen through the cracks for every Covid measure and financially, that is really hard.
‘I hope one day I have the energy and resources to influence change for self-employed people experiencing hardship.
‘I know that we are luckier than some – we still have a roof over our head and food to eat – but I feel like we are in such a vulnerable situation right now. One more crisis would just leave us in a precarious financial position.’
Barbara now posts about her journey, her work and the support she received from charities such as Shine throughout her journey on her Instagram account @adventurelovingbabs.
Demelza Jefferis noticed what looked like a stretch mark on her breast as she got out of the shower and her towel fell open (Picture: Kennedy News and Media)
A mum has shared her shock at discovering that a ‘stretch mark’ on her breast was in fact a sign of cancer.
Demelza Jefferis, from Plymouth, Devon, was getting out of the shower when she accidentally dropped her towel and noticed a strange mark on her cleavage.
She initially dismissed it as a stretch mark, but when she took a second look Demelza, 42, noticed it was a small dent that only appeared when her arm was raised.
The mum-of-one had always been thorough in checking her breasts for lumps as her grandma died from breast cancer aged just 58, so was shocked to spot the mark by total chance.
Demelza lifted and relaxed her arm close to 100 times to inspect the small crease by her left nipple before calling over husband Gary, 42, to check if he could see it too.
After contacting her GP, a month later mammograms and biopsies confirmed Demelza had stage two breast cancer.
Thankfully treatment was successful and Demelza has been given the all-clear, so she is now sharing photos of the stretch mark like shape in the hopes of making other women aware of a cancer sign they might not know to look out for.
Signs of breast cancer
Possible signs of breast cancer include:
a lump or thickening in your breast or armpit
a change to the skin of your breast
changes in the shape, size or feel of your breast
nipple changes
nipple discharge
pain in your breast
any other unusual or persistent changes to your breast
If you have any of these symptoms, see your GP as soon as possible. If you know anyone who has any of these symptoms, insist they see their doctor.
Demelza said: ‘I’ve always looked at my boobs, checked and felt them.
‘I’ve always been amazed at how many people have actually said they would never think to check. It takes two minutes.
‘At this time, when I didn’t actually look and feel, it was the time that something was actually there.
‘Someone was definitely looking over me that day, for sure. I’m a true believer in that – someone was looking over me and saying, “we need to get you to have a look”. It’s really uncanny how everything unfolded.
The small dent that Demelza saw on her breast (Picture: Kennedy News and Media)
‘[When lockdown started], I was more concerned that I wouldn’t be able to have my armpits waxed.
‘I got out of the shower and thought, “oh my god, my armpits are so bad that I don’t want to shave them, I’m going to have to look at getting some home wax kit”.
‘With that, I had my left arm up and my towel dropped. As my towel dropped, I went to grab it and I looked up in the mirror. The light was shining through the window, and I thought, “oh, what’s that?”.
‘I thought, having had kids, it was just a stretch mark [on my breast]. I thought it was a stretch mark for a split second, until I put my arm back up.
‘I put my arm up again to check. I must have done it a good 10 to 100 times because every time I put my arm up it was there, and every time I put it down, it wasn’t there.’
After an MRI scan, Demelza had an operation on 18 May to remove the lump from her chest.
She says she was shocked to tears by the news that she had cancer.
‘I couldn’t believe it was happening,’ she said. ‘I still can’t get my head around the fact it’s happened.
‘With Covid-19 and everything that’s happened, it has been such a blur. It’s just weird.
‘It’s gone now, and it’s done. I can build a bridge and get over it. But it was very overwhelming.
‘They removed the lump and a couple of lymph nodes from my armpit. They sent those away for testing to make sure it was all clear. None of my lymph nodes had cancer in them.
‘It was really, really good. She said to me, “you caught this early. You’re so lucky to have found what you did”.’
After two weeks of radiotherapy, Demelza completed her treatment on 31 July – on her 16th wedding anniversary.
Now she is urging women to be thorough when checking their breasts and to look for signs of visual change, such as dents and dimpling, as well as feeling for lumps.
Demelza said: ‘Just check your boobs. It’s so important that people don’t leave it. It takes two minutes to check your boobs. People have just got to do it.
‘What’s more important – life, or getting bad news where it could be terminal?’
Ready to put your mind to the test? (Picture: Getty/Metro.co.uk)
Many of us secretly suspect we’re geniuses.
Who doesn’t want to be considered super smart, after all?
But are you ready to put your mind to the test?
Don’t worry – you don’t have to sit a proper exam (unless you want to actually, officially, declared as a genius. We can’t help you with that).
The people over at Playbuzz have instead come up with a 15-question quiz to help you quickly see if you possess the traits of a highly intelligent person.
Created by US-based quiz master Terry Stein, the quiz claims that if you get nine or more questions right, you ‘probably’ have an IQ of over 151, making you smarter than average,
Just to be clear, this is not an officially governed test and you should not go barrelling into your boss’s office demanding a promotion because you are clearly destined for MENSA.
Think of it instead as a fun quiz to see if you’re correct in your suspicions that you are highly intelligent. Ready?
If you haven’t heard – or felt the sweat patches – already, today the heatwave is coming to the UK in earnest, with temperatures potentially reaching 37C.
Many of us will be looking for ways to beat the heat, and Asda have given us a little helping hand over what yo choose.
Their popular dinosaur sprinkler toy has today been discounted to just £35, which is £15 off its original price of £40.
The Kid Connection sprinkler is 7ft tall and – as you can probably see – features a big inflatable dinosaur.
This then simply attaches to a garden hose, and when you turn it on will spurt water from its mouth.
In the box you’ll also find a repair kit, so you can make the sprinkler last many a hot summer.
The perfect thing for parents of dino-loving kids (Picture: Asda/Getty
You can find the toy in the reduced garden section at your local Asda store, although it’s currently out of stock on the website.
For an alternative if your store is out of stock too, Amazon has a 4ft version by Bestway available for £18.99. They have free Prime delivery, and you might miss the hottest of the heatwave, but you’ll have it there for when the mercury spikes once again.
The supermarkets are really doing their bit to keep us cool over the summer, with Aldi offering some incredible deals on outdoor play products.
Looking back, I was very naive. I don’t think I fully understood the severity of what the doctors had said to me.
I felt sad, I cried, and I went through a ‘why me’ phase – but it was very short. It wasn’t important to me why I had got cancer, only the decisions and steps I needed to make to get better.
It helped that I had a new relationship to focus on.
James and I had our first date the day before my diagnosis but by the time my surgery came around, we were already serious about one another.
Making the decision about having a mastectomy and losing my breast was devastating. Although I had a reconstruction, I felt like I lost half of what made me a woman.
Particularly being in a new relationship, I was worried about what it would mean. Would I still be me?
I remember asking about breastfeeding even then – would it even be possible to feed a child with one breast? The doctors tried to be positive, but the truth was they simply didn’t know.
Worse was to come, however. With my breast gone, I was prescribed a four month course of chemotherapy and put on hormone therapy medication, called tamoxifen.
I couldn’t freeze my eggs and no one on my medical team could tell me how my fertility would be affected by the time I finished all the drugs.
Then, in October 2015, three years after my mastectomy and initial treatment the cancer came back.
I underwent a lumpectomy and a round of radiotherapy, and was put on a five-year course of even stronger hormone therapy medication, this time in the form of injections that effectively told my body to stop ovulating.
It was even harder than the first time around. James and I had already waited so long to start a family only to be told no, yet again.
I knew I couldn’t wait another five years to even start trying to get pregnant. Friends were already having their second and third children.
When my best friend told me she was pregnant, I bawled my eyes out, not because I wasn’t happy for her, but because I so desperately wanted what she had. And, yet again, cancer had got in the way.
We had no option but to be patient, and my doctors at least agreed to reduce the course of injections from five years to two – and when it finally finished, despite there being no guarantees, James and I started trying for a baby almost straight away.
My first period came that July, and the second in early August, and I conceived later that month. I simply couldn’t believe it. I took a test at six am before work and was shocked when two lines appeared.
I then did three further tests just to be sure.
Despite the hospital keeping a close eye on me, I had a healthy pregnancy and, throughout, breastfeeding remained one of my priorities.
I asked everyone about it: my consultant, my midwives – even my hypnobirthing group. But just like when I’d had cancer the first time, there were no clear answers.
My consultant said that it should be possible to feed with one breast but that my body was unlikely to produce enough milk, and I would have to use formula to top up my feeds.
The midwives were more positive. They felt that there wasn’t any reason why I couldn’t feed on just one side; my body would produce what my baby needed, and they equated it to having twins.
My son, Javier, was born on 28 May 2019 (Picture: Joana Cerqueira)
I had never thought about it that way – I had always thought that I was abnormal for only having one breast.
My son, Javier, was born on 28 May 2019 and I started feeding him about an hour after he was born as I lay in the recovery room after a caesarean.
I produced colostrum (the thick, concentrated substance produced before milk) easily and Javier seemed happy. I never felt that he wanted extra feeds, or that I needed to give him formula.
By day two, my milk came in and by the third day he was cluster feeding – when babies eat more frequently – throughout the night.
It wasn’t always straightforward. Only having one breast with which to feed him meant I had no respite. It really took its toll on my nipple.
During a visit to a breastfeeding clinic, the nurse was aghast at how red and sore it was.
But I just kept on going. I think I have always been quite determined and yes, it was painful, but I don’t think my breastfeeding experience was any worse than anyone else’s.
In fact, I felt incredibly proud that I was able to do it. I was really proud of my body, too, for getting me through pregnancy, and that it wanted to produce milk for my baby.
Looking down at my son as he fed, even at 3am, the bond was incredible.
I think there was a part of me that saw having children as a way of saying to the cancer that it hadn’t beaten me or stopped me doing what I wanted with my life.
I’m a cancer patient and will always be, but this disease hasn’t stopped me moving forward. Breastfeeding was a huge part of that. It was like showing the world what’s really important to me.
Javier is now 14 months old and I am still breastfeeding him. It feels like it’s what he needs from me, and my mindset has switched. Initially, I suspect that I was breastfeeding to prove something, at least to myself. Now, I do it because it feels natural, my son loves it and I love it.
I haven’t been given the all-clear from cancer as such but I haven’t had a recurrence for two years and that’s a positive sign.
James and I are definitely thinking about having more children. I feel so much more confident knowing what my body can do.
Do you have a story you’d like to share? Get in touch by emailing platform@metro.co.uk
Be prepared for some smoke (Picture: Burnt Lemon Chefs)
As the weekend rolls in, with a heatwave to boot, this is the perfect time to get the grill fired up.
If it’s your first time BBQing or you just want to kick things up a notch and show off mad cooking skills, you’re in luck.
We’ve talked to chef and BBQ extraordinaire James Peck, founder of Burnt Lemon Chefs, to get his top tips on how to perfect your meat.
From what type of meat is best to run with during hot weather to what questions to ask your butcher, and how long to keep your sizzling foods on the grill, here’s everything you need to know to become a grill master.
When you buy the meat
Don’t be afraid to talk to your butcher – selection is everything.
James says: ‘I recommend buying your meat from a good local butcher, so that you know the traceability and whether it’s sustainable.
‘This ensures that the animal was bred properly, and doesn’t come from a non-regulated farm, and that you’ll get a good-quality piece of meat.
‘Go for something with a bit of fat on it – like rib eye steak, pork chops or pork belly – these will retain moisture and be juicier when you’re cooking at a high temperature, so you avoid ending up with a dried up dish.
‘If you don’t have time to marinate it yourself, ask your butcher if they have BBQ-ready meats and what will be the best option for the type of grill you have.’
How to prep your grill
To get the ultimate flavour, James recommends cooking over charcoal – but wood works just as well.
And as a last resort: briquettes (the kind you get in the supermarket).
He says: ‘Before you do any cooking, sterilise your grill. Burn it for 15 to 20 minutes, then scrape it down with a brush so it’s clean before you get your meat on it.
Look at those tasty treats (Picture: Burnt Lemon Chefs)
‘And take care with safety; wear protective gloves and only use long utensiles so that you don’t put your hands over the flame. Always wash your hands first, and have separate equipment for cooked and raw meats to avoid cross-contamination.
‘If you’re using a disposable BBQ that you can get in most supermarkets, take care with where you place it – never put it directly on a dry surface (such as grass in the park) but opt for placing it on top of bricks.
‘Finally, get your charcoal glowing orange and you’re ready to roll.’
How to prep your meat
Get handsy with your meat and don’t go from fridge to grill insteantly – you want it to be at room temperature, as this will help it cook quicker and more evenly.
James says: ‘You can pre-marinate but you don’t want to use too many species because these tend to burn over such a high temperaature, so you can brush over a sauce while they’re on the grill instead.
‘Ideally, you should marinate the meat the night before, but in a worst-case scenario, 20 minutes before BBQ time will do.’
‘Just rub it in, I don’t give it a back rub but don’t be afraid to get your hands dirty.’
Not a meat eater?
James adds: ‘Tenderstem broccoli and cauliflower are great over charcoal.
‘Drizzle these with a bit of rapeseed oil – or a flavoured oil if you prefer – but let the charcoal do most of the job.
‘When it comes off the grill, toss it in some crushed almonds or peanuts and drizzle on some garlic oil.’
Avoid overtly sugary marinades, such as teriyaki, as these often burn on the grill.’
James’ personal favourite? Smoked sea salt and smoke rapeseed oil.
How to BBQ it
And now, for the most important part: the actual BBQing.
James says: ‘Make sure your grill is bloody hot and clean, then gently lay the meat away from you so it doesn’t splash back.
‘I can’t emphasise this enough – always leave the meat for at least two minutes before you turn it.
‘You want to turn it 90 degrees every few minutes depending on your heat and the meat of choice; the thicker the meat, the longer it should remain to get a good sear.
‘If the meat is starting to stick, it needs more time on the grill.’
How long you leave your meat also depends on how you prefer it cooked i.e. rare, medium, well done.
‘Everyone’s grill will be different so you’ll need to use a bit of touch and feel here; if the meat bounces back and feels tight, it is leaning towards more well done, if it’s spungy, it’s more on the rare side.
‘It’s a good idea to get yourself a meat thermometer.
‘And let your meat rest before you slice it, otherwise it’ll just release all of its juices. ‘
More meat chefs chip in with their tips
To get some more insight into how to become a grill master, we asked a few more chefs to chip in with their top tips:
Tommy Heaney, owner of Heaneys in Cardiff, said: ‘I love the versatility of a BBQ, I will literally cook anything on there – I’ve even cooked my Christmas turkey on the BBQ in the snow. Lamb loin or rump are probably my favourite red meat as they have lovely fat on them when BBQed and rendered gets a crispy, flavour.
‘Lastly I’m a huge fan of BBQ whole fish; whole dory, mackerel, monkfish tail on the bone or whole turbot. Use a fish that can really hold up to the flavour of the BBQ and keep the fish moving to get a nice even cook but also keep the juices rotating.’
Alex Head, founder and head chef of Social Pantry said: ‘Try Bavette steak. It’s packed with flavour, and it’s a thin cut so doesn’t take long to cook, leaving you more time to slice up some salad or sip on a drink. Best served ‘rare’ or less, it’s great with a fresh pesto drizzled on top.
‘If you have a bit more time on your hands and you are blessed with good Sunday weather, try a lamb belly BBQ roast. Best to seal the meat in a pan with some hot oil first, 10 minutes is fine, then wrap the lamb in foil, poke with foil and leave on embers for 1.5hours until juicy, tender and can be pulled apart with your fingers. This fatty cut will ooze with flavour.’
Chef James Cochran, said: ‘When cooking chicken on the BBQ, it’s important to know what the different sections and parts of the BBQ are good for what stage of cooking you’re in.
‘Start by cooking your chicken on the top shelf of the BBQ so the heat can slowly cook the meat making sure the middle is cooked with the lid down. This creates steam to ensure moist chicken and ensure the middle is cooked through. This can take up to 40 minutes for leg and thigh pieces so be patient!
‘After that, with your metal tongs, bring the chicken onto the bottom shelf to chargrill and impart that smokiness that makes BBQ’d chicken something extra special.’
There are two types of people: the ones who welcome the news of a 10-day heatwave, culminating in temperatures of up to 37C, and then there’s normal people.
Whichever camp you fall into though, there’s no denying that sunshine is great, but the intense temperatures can be something of an issue.
Whether you’re prone to getting burnt, losing out on sleep or just… too hot, here are the answers to your burning questions.
The World Meteorological Organisation defines a heatwave as, ‘when the daily maximum temperature of more than five consecutive days exceeds the average maximum temperature by 5 °C, the normal period being 1961-1990.’
So, roughly defined, a heatwave occurs when it’s hotter than usual by five degrees or more, which means we’re definitely in the middle of one.
You’ll recognise a heatwave by the sheer amount of skin on show across the country (Picture: AP)
Do: Drink lots of water This one doesn’t need much explanation really.
Do: Think about the coldest place you can Transport your mind to the coldest place you can imagine – simply day dreaming about things like snow can help lower your overall body temperature because your body will react to your thoughts about cooler temperatures.
Do: Run your wrists under a cold tap Because one of your main veins passes through your wrist, a quick dip under the tap and can help cool down your blood quickly
Do: Eat spicy food Yes, really. Spicy foods help you sweat, which will in turn cool you down.
Don’t: Use your hands as a fan Fanning your face with your hands will momentarily cool you down, but the rapid movement from your hands will raise your temperature overall.
So, maybe invest in a fan.
Don’t fan too furiously (Picture: Getty)
How to keep your house cool
You don’t need a swanky air conditioning unit to keep cool (because let’s face it, you’d only get two weeks’ of use out of it anyway).
Putting a bowl of ice in front of a fan As the ice melts, the breeze from the fan will pick up the cool air coming from the ice’s surface, creating a cool effect, similar to an air conditioning unit.
Turning off your lights and electrical appliances Light bulbs and electrical appliances radiate heat, so make sure you turn off any that aren’t being used.
Hanging a wet sheet This technique is a simple one if you can’t stand the whirring of an electric fan. Simply drape a wet sheet over an open window – the moisture from the sheet will turn the breeze cool.
We suggest crushing up any spare ice and putting it in a mojito. For your health, of course… (Picture: Getty)
How to make sure your houseplants survive the heatwave
Move your plants away from fans or air conditioning units Putting plants in front of a fan will cool them down, but doing this can also dehydrate the air surrounding the shrubs, and plants don’t enjoy cold air on their leaves.
Instead, keep plans dry by ensuring your windows are shut during the day and opened only when the temperatures drop outside.
Don’t let plants sit in water It goes without saying that plants should be watered, but make sure their roots aren’t floating in water, as this can lead to flies laying eggs in the soil.
To protect against this, add a few pebbles to the bottom of a plant pot.
Your plants might need some TLC (Picture: Getty)
How to keep babies cool
When it comes to keeping babies safe and cool in a heatwace, the NHS says that babies under 6 months old should be kept out of direct sunlight, and that babies older than 6 months should still be kept out of the sun as much as possible, particularly if it’s excessively hot and between the hours of 11am and 3pm, when the sun shines the strongest.
If you go out when it’s hot, you can keep your baby out of direct sunlight by attaching an umbrella, parasol or other type of sunshade to their pram.
You should also use a sunscreen of SPF of at least 30 on your baby, and check that the product protects against both UVA and UVB rays.
To keep babies cool (and to give them something fun to do) you might try getting the paddling pool out and putting it in the shade for you and them to play in.
Best technology to keep you cool
From personalised air conditioning to a cooling sports vest (which sadly is not very sartorially sound), we’ve rounded up the best gadgets for keeping cool during the hot weather.
The blistering sun isn’t always kind to British skin, so it goes without saying that a lot of people will be a red-faced this weekend.
Generally, the symptoms of sunburn will appear within a couple of hours of sun exposure, however, the full effects may take 24 hours to appear.
This changes, based on the degree of sunburn you have: a mild burn will be accompanied by redness, some pain, and sensitivity and can last from three to five days.
There may be some peeling in the final days as the skin repairs itself, shedding the dead skin.
Moderate sunburns will be more painful and take around one week to heal completely, with the skin peeling for a few days afterwards.
Severe sunburn can require medical attention. If you have it, your skin will blister and it could take up to two weeks before it heals.
Quite simply, a prolonged spell of hot weather does increase the risk of inflammatory bowel disease (IBD) problems and the risk of infectious gastroenteritis (IG) outbreaks – both of which are likely to result in the victim suffering from diarrhoea.
Diarrhoea can also be a symptom of illnesses such as heat exhaustion and heat stroke, so if you are experiencing other symptoms of that – such as headaches, dizziness, excessive sweating and cramps in the arms, legs and stomach, then seek medical help.
Every week, we’ll get a sneak peek into seven days of the most private parts of a person’s life. In other words: what they get up to in the bedroom (or indeed outside of the bedroom).
More so than just being about sex, this series will explore what makes people tick, what affects their sex drive,relationships, and all the other things that make up our love and sex lives.
We’ll dive into every kind of sexuality and gender, hearing from LGBTQ+ communities, the fetish and polyamory world, people who have sex constantly, people who never have sex – and everything in-between.
First up, we have Sharon*, a single woman who has been spending lockdown rekindling an on-again, off-again fling with a man.
But enough from us – let’s get to the juicy stuff.
Monday
Before lockdown, I had an on-again, off-again relationship with a man I met through friends.
There’s huge amounts of chemistry but we don’t work as a couple, so we spent a lot of time having great sex, trying to date, getting annoyed at one another, then just having sex again.
Weeks ago, at the height of the pandemic, he asked if he could move in with me. I could see the benefits for him – home-cooked meals, sex on tap, an escape from his housemates.
But I knew that after even a few days we’d have driven each other up the wall.
He’s very attractive but old-fashioned. He doesn’t do housework, he can’t cook and we have different pastimes. I like my space and I could see myself turning into a frustrated, nagging girlfriend within weeks.
I felt the fact that he’d even ask me indicated a lack of respect and a lack of concern for my health.
It’s funny really. Before lockdown I sometimes bought into that nonsense women get fed about the absolute horror of dying unloved and alone. But the more time I spend alone, the more I find I’m enjoying my own company.
Tuesday
I watch a cheesy rom-com. Watching people kissing on TV and in films is weird now.
The idea of kissing on a first date is unthinkable. I wonder if more people will go back to their exes because they feel safer?
Wednesday
The guy messages me a terrible joke and that he ‘really needs a shag’. He’s quite convinced that men can’t just give up sex. I don’t know how he thinks monks manage.
He’s very attractive, and pre-pandemic never struggled to meet women or have sex.
It’s also interesting to me how anti-masturbation he claims to be. I’ve always assumed this was a thing men did all the time.
I definitely use sex to destress and this week has been very stressful with work, family drama and the global pandemic (Picture: Ella Byworth for Metro.co.uk)
I never thought I’d conform to the girly stereotype of wanting hugs but, in fact, living alone and having had no physical human contact, sexual or otherwise, for three months has been hard.
I can live without the sex but I really miss the greeting hugs, the goodbye hugs, the supportive hugs.
A friend died of coronavirus recently and it would have been nice to have a hug from friends, family or even the guy I’m seeing. It would also be nice to have a hug after a particularly stressful day (aka all days at the moment).
Instead I’m taking a lot of baths and wrapping myself in soft blankets.
Thursday
People are talking about going out for coffee, drinks and dinner on. This doesn’t interest me.
The idea of socialising with drunk, sexually frustrated men (and women) who, as they get more drunk, forget the two-metre rule is actually quite scary to me. I’d rather stay home until Christmas, if the virus hasn’t spiked again then.
Guy texts me asking if he can have sex with my breasts. I tell him I don’t see how he can do that from two metres away.
Friday
I spend half the day having sex day dreams, but when the guy messages me I still tell him not to come round.
I’m seeing elderly relatives tomorrow so I definitely can’t risk picking up a deadly virus from him now.
Saturday
I chat to a friend about my relationship with the guy.
She doesn’t like him, thinks he’s using me for sex and that I could do better. I always felt I was using him as much as he used me, just until I met someone better.
I see my family and it’s great. They have no idea about the relationship I have with the guy – there’s no point me trying to explain it to them, because it’s not serious.
Although they have asked if I’m gay because I’m not married yet (I have also told them many times I have no interest in marriage or children).
Sunday
I definitely use sex to destress and this week has been very stressful with work, family drama and the global pandemic.
Not being able to have it, or the regular (normal) massages I used to have is definitely hard.
I spend most of the morning masturbating to the messages the guy has sent me and memories of what we used to do.
I might see him tonight, then isolate from my family for 14 days if I think I have coronavirus symptoms.
I miss sex and I miss being held. I don’t think couples understand how difficult the past few months have been for single people – or people not in traditional monogamous relationships.
How I Do It
In Metro.co.uk’s How I Do It you get a sneak peek into a week of a person’s sex and love life – from vanilla love-making to fetishes, threesomes and polyamorous relationships, they reveal it all.
