Inga’s arms didn’t grow in the womb (Picture: Inga Petry / SWNS)
Inga Petry is has seriously talented toes.
The law student, who lives in Atlanta, Georgia, was born without arms. Rather than using prosthetics, she’s learned to use her feet for everything, including cooking, doing her makeup, and even playing the cello.
Inga was born in Novosibirsk in Siberia with upper limb aplasia, a condition where the arms do not form in womb.
She was adopted by an American couple, Daniel and Jennifer Petry, when she was two years old, and knows nothing about her biological parents – but imagines she would have faced a difficult life in Russia with her disability.
‘I have never met my birth parents but I know that because of the culture in Russia, I might have been sent to an asylum and the stigma would have been unbearable,’ says Inga.
‘It was better for me to be adopted.’
Daniel, an accountant, and Jennifer, a musician, raised Inga to know that her disability didn’t have to hold her back.
Jennifer even taught Inga how to play the cello with her feet.
Inga says: ‘I use my legs to write and type. I use them to eat and I also cook a lot with my feet.
Inga was born in Russia but was lucky to be adopted by an American couple (Picture: Inga Petry / SWNS)
‘I have wonderful friends and a wonderful boyfriend who help me when I get in over my head.
‘I have been given prosthetics and I was thankful for them, but they don’t really work for me. I have gotten along so well without them.
‘My parents taught me that there were no excuses.
‘My mum was a music teacher and she taught me how to play the cello without arms.
Inga is skilled with her feet, even using her toes to eat with chopsticks (Picture: Inga Petry / SWNS)
‘Living without arms is all I’ve ever known. I do think I had to work a little harder to get where I wanted to be.
‘I decided to move to New York City, probably not the easiest city for anyone, let alone someone without arms.
‘I ride the subway and I do fine.’
Inga is a pre-law major and hopes to become an attorney one day.
Her disability has not affected her love life and during the coronavirus she quarantined with her boyfriend of 18 months, Joseph Macuga, 22.
She has a boyfriend, called Joseph (Picture: Inga Petry / SWNS)
But Inga said she does sometimes receive nasty and highly sexual messages on social media.
‘I get over-sexualized comments and a lot of people asking if I can read,’ she explains.
‘Some people have said to me that I’m really pretty for someone who doesn’t have arms.
Inga’s disability has attracted rude and sexual messages (Picture: Inga Petry / SWNS)
‘That’s supposed to be a compliment, but it doesn’t feel like a compliment.
‘I could spend the rest of my life crying that I don’t have arms but I got over that pretty quickly.’
As well as working towards being a lawyer, Inga would love to model, if only to get more diversity and representation into the world of fashion.
‘I think it would be incredible to see more women with disabilities in the modeling and fashion industry,’ she adds.
If it has a stick, does that make it an ice lolly? (Picture: Getty)
There will likely be thousands of people across the UK today picking up a Magnum from the shops to cool themselves down.
But apparently, many of those people also don’t believe that the Magnum is even an ice lolly.
This is despite the fact that, in 2018, it was voted the nation’s favourite ice lolly by more than one in four Britons.
The recent YouGov survey revealed: ‘Almost six in ten (59%) say the ice cream covered in chocolate – famously ‘invented’ by James Bond actor Roger Moore – is not an ice lolly, compared to 41% who disagree.’
Cornettos were also defined in the poll as definitely not an ice lolly, with Feast, Funny Feet, and Solero only just making the cut.
The most legit and correctly-named as an ice lolly is the Fruit Pastille, closely followed by a lemonade lolly and a Fab.
In between was Calippo, Twister, Mini Milk, and Strawberry Split (in that order).
This begs the question, what makes an ice lolly?
The results have shown a deep divide in this country (Picture: PA)
Back when YouGov shared that Magnum had top the charts as best ice lolly, there was outrage. Broadcaster James O’Brien tweeted ‘Magnum’s not a lolly. It’s a choc-ice. If you stuck a stick in a frozen apple, it would still be an apple. #TeamFab.’
Another person wrote: ‘It’s not an ice lolly if it has chocolate. Soleros are only just an ice lolly. Fight me.’
So what would a chocolate Mini Milk be, then? Or the high-scoring on the ice lolly test Fab, which has both ice cream and chocolate?
Could it be posited that it isn’t Brexit or mask wearing or cyclists’ rights that divide us as a nation, but these arbitrary rules on what makes an ice lolly?
Apparently there are also age-based factors at play. For example, older Brits are split 48/51 on whether a Magnum is an ice lolly, but 72% of younger folks say it doesn’t count.
Younger people are also more likely to say that Calippos (97% vs 78%) and Twisters (87% vs 72%) are ice lollies than older people.
Please, we can’t handle another Boomers vs Zoomers fight. We just want to enjoy our Magnum.
Since cats were first domesticated in Ancient Egypt thousands of years ago, the regal four-legged, furry beings have become a beloved pet for many the world over.
Cat cafes, festivals and celebrations are very much the norm and International Cat Day is just one way to pay homage to people’s feline pets.
So to mark the day, here are some top-notch memes for cat lovers…
Cat memes to celebrate International Cat Day
Featuring cats, about cats, celebrating cats – here are some of our favourite cat memes on the internet right now:
This is a question you’ve probably been asked many time in your life, often by men wearing Barbour jackets in their dating app pictures who desperately want you to say dog so they can impress you with their new puppy.
There are tons of tropes in terms of our affinity to pets, but the great divide appears to be between cats (seen as aloof and uncaring) and dogs (seen as blindly loyal and enthusiastic).
There’s the ‘crazy cat lady’ stereotype, or the ‘lonely spinster who lives with exactly 13 cats and exactly no love’. For some reason cats seem to be associated with women and shone in a negative light.
Cat people, however, would likely tell you that the reason they love their feline friends is that they’re affectionate only when they want to be, and aren’t as needy or naive as dogs.
Dog people, too, are fiercely proud of being just that. Cats are mean, they say. Cats only come around when they want food, they argue.
These are all anecdotal stories, of course. But there’s apparently a science in why some people prefer cats or dogs, as well as why they use that as a marker with which to identify themselves.
If they can be friends, why can’t we? (Picture: Getty Images/500px Prime)
Research typically shows that those who define themselves by loving cats or by loving dogs have different personality traits.
As part of the study, they concluded: ‘Results suggest that dog people are higher on Extraversion, Agreeableness, and Conscientiousness, but lower on Neuroticism and Openness than are cat people.’
A separate study in the same journal hinted that the reasoning behind dog people wanting dogs in the first place is partly due to their sociable and somewhat dominant nature.
I would like to know how they took this picture (Picture: Getty Images)
Researchers concluded ‘that individuals who are high on these traits tend to prefer submissive pets such as dogs, whose temperament complements their preference for dominance.’
While dog people are able to establish dominance over their pets, cat owners are having a lot less of a say in their shared lives. Nearly half of house cats have physically attacked their owners, and as solitary animals they don’t take kindly to being told what to do.
It would appear that more submissive cat owners are happy to be around a pet who plays by their own rules, while dog owners prefer to make – and enforce – the rules themselves.
There are also of course going to be practical reasons why people prefer cats or dogs. Those who prefer being outdoors are going to be more suited for dog walks, while people who are home slightly less (and have a cat flap) will be happy to see their cat when they see them.
Can dogs have ice lollies? (Picture: Getty Images/EyeEm)
If it’s too hot for us, it’s definitely too hot for our cats and dogs.
There are lots of tips and tricks to keep cats and dogs cool in the hot weather, but one of the cutest methods is providing your pet with their very own icy treat.
But please don’t rush to just give your much-loved pets a lick of whatever ice lolly or ice cream you’ve picked up from the van.
While a Calippo might be just what you need to keep your cool when temperatures rise, the treats we love can cause harm to cats and dogs.
Instead, you’ll need to make your pets their own frozen treats. Handily enough, we’ve got a recipe for ice lollies for cats and dogs below.
Can cats and dogs have ice lollies?
What about cats? (Picture: Getty Images/500px)
Cats and dogs are fine to have ice cubes and blocks in the heat, whether you put them in their water bowl or just pass your pet an ice cube to play with.
They can also have ice lollies – but only ones made especially for cats and dogs.
The sugars and other ingredients in iced treats made for humans can cause harm to our four-legged friends, ranging from vomiting and diarrhoea to severe reactions.
Even a few licks of plain ice cream can cause trouble, as cats and dogs can struggle to digest lactose, meaning they’ll vomit.
Instead, you need to make your pet their very own lolly with ingredients that are good for them… and that they’ll actually enjoy. Cats don’t have sweet taste buds, after all, so even the poshest sugary ice cream flavour won’t be that exciting for them.
How to make an ice lolly for your cat
Battersea’s ice lollies for cats are made with the water from a tuna can (Picture: Battersea)
This recipe is from Battersea, and while the resulting lolly seems pretty gross to people, your cat will absolutely love it.
Ingredients:
Liquid from 1 Tin of tuna in spring water
400ml Water
Small Paper cup for a mould
Meaty treat stick (or any stick-shaped cat treat)
Method:
Measure out your water into a jug, then drain in the liquid from a tin of tuna in spring water. Give it a quick stir.
Pour the mixture into small paper cups (or whatever you are using as a mould) and place in the freezer until they are partially set. This should take about one hour and the mixture should be enough for around 5-6 lollies.
Once they have started to freeze, take the lollies out and add a meaty stick-shaped cat treat to make the stick of the lolly. Place back in the freezer until they are completely frozen.
Once frozen, remove the paper cup before giving one to your cat. It’s best to give these to your cat outdoors (in the shade, if it’s a very hot day), or in a bowl, so the lolly doesn’t melt all over your floor!
How to make an ice lolly for your dog
Yes, these are also safe for humans to eat, but you might not be that keen (Picture: Battersea)
Ingredients:
1 Apple
1 Carrot
300ml Water
Meaty treat stick (stick-shaped edible dog treat)
Paper cups for a mould
Method:
Slice your apple, making sure that the core and seeds are removed, and chop into small pieces. Then grate your carrot.
Measure out the water into a jug and tip in your apple and carrot. Blend with a hand blender until smooth. This recipe will make around 5 lollies.
Pour the mixture into small paper cups and place in the freezer until they are partially frozen. This will take between 1-2 hours.
Once they are partially set, take them out and add a meaty stick-shaped treat to create the stick of the ice lolly. Place back in the freezer until completely set.
Remove the paper cup before giving one to your dog. We recommend your dog eats their lolly outside (in a shaded area if it is a very hot day), in their bowl or on a floor which you can easily clean, so it doesn’t melt into any rugs or carpet.
You can add loads of other ingredients to your dog’s ice lolly, such as flax seed, blueberries, peanut butter, and meat – just make sure to check your chosen ingredients are safe for dogs then load ’em in.
Look how happy this dog is to have his own lolly! (Picture: Battersea)
Rebecca MacIver, rehoming and welfare manager at Battersea, said: ‘Hot weather can be really uncomfortable for dogs and cats, so it’s important that owners do a bit of forward planning on keeping their pets cool in higher temperatures.
‘At Battersea we give our canine and feline residents a frozen treat on warmer days, as part of their regular healthy balanced diets, to help keep them as comfortable as possible.
‘Making treats like these for your pet can be a great way to bond with them and is a fun activity for any member of the family!’
Tuscon would come into the shop sometimes with Emerson, but people loved him so much that he’s now got a job of his own as the store’s mascot.
He has a kennel in the dealership personalised with his name, as well as a staff lanyard like any good salesman would.
He made the right call giving the butchers a miss (Picture: @tucson_prime)
Apparently it hasn’t just been a positive for Tuscon, as customers have been coming back to the store to see him again and again – no doubt a boon for the sales.
Emerson told Top Motors Brazil about how Tuscon became a member of the Hyundai Prime family, and how he’s now also due to be starring in a nationwide advertising campaign for the brand.
Tuscon has his very own Instagram where he leisurely models in front of cars and sends off sales to their new owners.
And throughout the journey – and despite a few miles on his clock – he’s found a loving new owner of his own.
Over in Florence, wine windows that fell out of fashion after the Plague are reopening to serve up cocktails and more (Picture: Buchetti Di Vino)
Over in Tuscany, a vintage approach to social distanced drinking has made a return in answer to the coronavirus pandemic.
Wine windows – used in the midst of the Plague so people could sell wine without having to touch the infected lower classes – are back in Florence, where more than 150 wine windows have been reopened to serve up glasses of wine, cocktails and gelato.
Is it a little troubling that we’re bringing back something popularised by the Plague? Yes, yes it is.
But a hygienically handled Aperol Spritz still feels worth celebration.
The windows, or buchette del vino, are looked after by an official body, the Wine Window Association, who say on their website: ‘Everyone is confined to home for two months and then the government permits a gradual reopening.
The association wants to add plaques to all the wine windows that have survived the years (Picture: Associazione Buchette del Vino / Wine Window Association)
‘During this time, some enterprising Florentine Wine Window owners have turned back the clock and are using their Wine Windows to dispense glasses of wine, cups of coffee, drinks, sandwiches and ice cream — all germ-free, contactless!’
The website documents how the in-the-wall hatches went out of fashion post-1600s, comparing 2020 to the Plague times with a side-by-side comparison of the windows in action.
Now, with Covid-19 giving contactless booze handovers a new importance, the association wants to raise awareness of the history of wine windows and add in plaques to those that have survived the years.
The windows are an answer to the need for contactless food and drink orders amid coronavirus (Picture: Osteria delle Brache)
Matteo Faglia, president of the Wine Window Association, told Insider: ‘People could knock on the little wooden shutters and have their bottles filled direct from the Antinori, Frescobaldi and Ricasoli families, who still produce some of Italy’s best-known wine today.
‘The wine windows gradually became defunct, and many wooden ones were permanently lost in the floods of 1966.
‘We want to put a plaque by all the wine windows, as people tend to respect them more when they understand what they are and their history.’
Have you been wokefished? (Picture: Ella Byworth for Metro.co.uk)
If you’re someone who’s comfortable being described as ‘very online’, you’ll have heard of catfishing, kittenfishing, blackfishing, and maybe even hatfishing.
But what about wokefishing?
You might not know what wokefishing means, but if you’re currently single and actively dating, you’ve likely come across it.
In the same way that catfishing is masquerading as another person and kittenfishing is using old and edited photos to present yourself in a more flattering way, wokefishing, too, is a form of deception that’s doomed to cause disappointment.
Coined by Serena Smith for Vice, wokefishing describes when someone pretends to hold progressive – or ‘woke’ views to lure another person into dating them.
They seem lovely at first, but the problem arises when you learn that their ‘wokeness’ is only for appearances – beneath the surface, they really don’t care.
A wokefisher might proudly declare themselves a feminist, add #BlackLivesMatter to their Tinder bio, or say all the right things when you talk about, say, trans rights, improving accessibility for disabled people, or providing free healthcare. They’re all about saying the ‘right’ thing to make themselves seem like caring, unproblematic people.
But once you get to know them, they’re actually sexist, racist, or hold deeply problematic views.
Perhaps they claim they’re proudly feminist, but are quick to slut-shame women who they decide have committed a terrible crime by enjoying sex. Maybe they’ll post a black square on Instagram, but casually use racist slurs when they’re with their friends.
If their words don’t line up with their actions, ask questions (Picture: Ella Byworth for Metro.co.uk)
When you prod just a little below the surface, a wokefisher will reveal that they don’t actually share your views or relate to your values, they were just saying what they needed to get into your life.
It’s difficult to call them out, though, because often they believe they really are as woke as they proclaim. How can you call them sexist when they constantly praise their working mum? How dare you say they’re racist when they dated a Black woman once?
You can spot a wokefisher by keeping an eye and ear out for those times their words and actions don’t reflect their initial claims. Don’t dismiss those discrepancies – yes, someone’s opinions can change and grow, but if it’s starting to feel like they’ve hopped on a hashtag or label for woke points but don’t actually do anything beyond calling themselves anti-racist/feminist/pro trans rights, listen to your gut.
‘If it seems too good to be true, it usually is,’ Dr Carmen Harra tells Health. ‘Being honest from the beginning helps avoid mistakes that were made in former relationships,. It will save you much time if you come to the conclusion that this person doesn’t hold the same values as you. Allow yourself to be led by your intuition.’
In those instances, it’s important to know when the time comes to cut your losses and ditch the relationship. It’s tempting to try to educate someone, but if a person chooses to misrepresent their views and doesn’t even try to see your way of thinking – or constantly plays devil’s advocate – they’re probably not someone you want to dedicate all your energy to.
As Maya Angelou said: ‘When someone shows you who they are, believe them.’
We’d like to add to the end of that: ‘and get the hell out of there’.
Dating terms and trends, defined
Blue-stalling: When two people are dating and acting like a couple, but one person in the partnership states they're unready for any sort of label or commitment (despite acting in a different manner).
Breadcrumbing:Leaving ‘breadcrumbs’ of interest – random noncommittal messages and notifications that seem to lead on forever, but don’t actually end up taking you anywhere worthwhile Breadcrumbing is all about piquing someone’s interest without the payoff of a date or a relationship.
Caspering:Being a friendly ghost - meaning yes, you ghost, but you offer an explanation beforehand. Caspering is all about being a nice human being with common decency. A novel idea.
Catfish: Someone who uses a fake identity to lure dates online.
Clearing: Clearing season happens in January. It’s when we’re so miserable thanks to Christmas being over, the cold weather, and general seasonal dreariness, that we will hook up with anyone just so we don’t feel completely unattractive. You might bang an ex, or give that creepy guy who you don’t really fancy a chance, or put up with truly awful sex just so you can feel human touch. It’s a tough time. Stay strong.
Cloutlighting: Cloutlighting is the combo of gaslighting and chasing social media clout. Someone will bait the person they’re dating on camera with the intention of getting them upset or angry, or making them look stupid, then share the video for everyone to laugh at.
Cockfishing: Also known as catcocking. When someone sending dick pics uses photo editing software or other methods to change the look of their penis, usually making it look bigger than it really is.
Cuffing season: The chilly autumn and winter months when you are struck by a desire to be coupled up, or cuffed.
Firedooring: Being firedoored is when the access is entirely on one side, so you're always waiting for them to call or text and your efforts are shot down.
Fishing: When someone will send out messages to a bunch of people to see who’d be interested in hooking up, wait to see who responds, then take their pick of who they want to get with. It’s called fishing because the fisher loads up on bait, waits for one fish to bite, then ignores all the others.
Flashpanner:Someone who’s addicted to that warm, fuzzy, and exciting start bit of a relationship, but can’t handle the hard bits that might come after – such as having to make a firm commitment, or meeting their parents, or posting an Instagram photo with them captioned as ‘this one’.
Freckling:Freckling is when someone pops into your dating life when the weather’s nice… and then vanishes once it’s a little chillier.
Gatsbying:To post a video, picture or selfie to public social media purely for a love interest to see it.
Ghosting: Cutting off all communication without explanation.
Grande-ing:Being grateful, rather than resentful, for your exes, just like Ariana Grande.
Hatfishing: When someone who looks better when wearing a hat has pics on their dating profile that exclusively show them wearing hats.
Kittenfishing: Using images that are of you, but are flattering to a point that it might be deceptive. So using really old or heavily edited photos, for example. Kittenfishes can also wildly exaggerate their height, age, interests, or accomplishments.
Lovebombing: Showering someone with attention, gifts, gestures of affection, and promises for your future relationship, only to distract them from your not-so-great bits. In extreme cases this can form the basis for an abusive relationship.
Microcheating: Cheating without physically crossing the line. So stuff like emotional cheating, sexting, confiding in someone other than your partner, that sort of thing.
Mountaineering: Reaching for people who might be out of your league, or reaching for the absolute top of the mountain.
Obligaswiping: The act of endlessly swiping on dating apps and flirt-chatting away with no legitimate intention of meeting up, so you can tell yourself you're doing *something* to put yourself out there.
Orbiting: The act of watching someone's Instagram stories or liking their tweets or generally staying in their 'orbit' after a breakup.
Paperclipping: When someone sporadically pops up to remind you of their existence, to prevent you from ever fully moving on.
Preating: Pre-cheating - laying the groundwork and putting out feelers for cheating, by sending flirty messages or getting closer to a work crush.
Prowling: Going hot and cold when it comes to expressing romantic interest.
R-bombing:Not responding to your messages but reading them all, so you see the 'delivered' and 'read' signs and feel like throwing your phone across the room.
Scroogeing: Dumping someone right before Christmas so you don't have to buy them a present.
Shadowing: Posing with a hot friend in all your dating app photos, knowing people will assume you're the attractive one and will be too polite to ask.
Shaveducking: Feeling deeply confused over whether you're really attracted to a person or if they just have great facial hair.
Sneating:When you go on dates just for a free meal.
Stashing: The act of hiding someone you're dating from your friends, family, and social media.
Submarineing: When someone ghosts, then suddenly returns and acts like nothing happened.
V-lationshipping:When someone you used to date reappears just around Valentine's Day, usually out of loneliness and desperation.
You-turning:Falling head over heels for someone, only to suddenly change your mind and dip.
Zombieing: Ghosting then returning from the dead. Different from submarineing because at least a zombie will acknowledge their distance.
Gail is a big fan of upcycling (Picture: Caters News)
Some people have green fingers, and can turn their homes and gardens into tropical paradises without much though.
Some people, however, do not. These people might want to check out this ‘hack’, shared by a woman on Facebook.
38-year-old Gail Woollaston had purchased some potted bushes for outside, but despite her best efforts they kept turning brown.
Posting on Facebook, she wrote: ‘I thought my garden was looking a bit untidy so I decided to come up with my own solution and I think it worked!
‘I paid a lot of money for the plants and I didn’t want to get rid of them – I had tried everything to bring them back to life but it wasn’t working.’
Gail, from Birmingham, decided on a solution involving a can of spray paint and some ingenuity, spraying the leaves until they looked like new.
The plant was well and truly deceased (Picture: Caters)
Speaking to The Sun, Gail said: ‘The first time I tried it, I got the wrong paint so the plant looked too bright and fake but then I mixed two different colours together, and it turned out perfectly.
‘My friends have said that they wouldn’t have known any different!’
The mum-of-two has no plans to keep up with any gardening turmoil, instead choosing to spray any further plants that die.
Looks good as new – probably doesn’t feel it but what can you do (Picture: Caters)
Needless to say, this isn’t officially a hack. If you spray any slightly wilting but not quite dead plants they will, invariably, die.
Although, if you’re certain that a plant is beyond saving and you want the garden to look less like a foliage graveyard, this could be an option of sorts.
Make sure to use outdoor spray paint which will be waterproof, and keep sprayed plants away from animals or children.
It’s not clear how long you’ll have been spraying and a total leaf drop (after all, it’s hard to photosynthesise under all that paint) but if you’ve got nothing to lose, it’s a cost-effective way to brighten up your patio.
In a world of smart phones, algorithms, and internet-enabled everything, it seems more than ever that escaping technology is an aspiration we seldom realise.
You could try deleting Facebook, or putting your phone in a draw when you go to bed, but between work emails and the latest binge-worthy Netflix series you’re never really out of reach.
Enter Petit St Vincent — a lush private island in the Caribbean with no in-room Wi-Fi and data charges that would make your eyes water. Phones and TVs are nowhere to be seen.
Need more coffee or want to submit your breakfast order? Raise a yellow flag from the flagpole outside your beach-side cottage and room service won’t be far behind.
You can forget about scrolling through Instagram while working on your tan or FaceTiming your mum as you sip a cold beer. Your only hope of connecting with the outside world is a hike up a hill to reception, where the signal doesn’t extend beyond a few feet.
The morning view from the Main Pavilion Restaurant (Picture: Brett Leppard)
If you’re looking to escape the world — and there’s certainly a lot reasons to right now — you would be hard-pressed to find a more remote and relaxing place.
With just 21 cottages on this 115-acre island, the chance of seeing other guests is slim. If you’re lucky you might spot someone cycling to their favourite beach spot or hiking up Marni Hill for a perfect view of the Caribbean Sea.
There’s enough space, and more importantly beach, that even if your preferred hammock is taken you can just walk a bit further and find your own piece of paradise.
Shy of buying your own island, Petit St Vincent is about as low key and private as you can get.
Who needs a cottage when you have this hammock? (Picture: Brett Leppard)
Fortunately, privacy does not come at the expense of activity. While you could certainly spend your days reading on the beach, this small island offers a great deal more.
There’s a fitness trail, best tackled in the morning, if you’re looking to really earn those hours of doing nothing. Tennis too, is available, if you’re curious to see how your serve fares in the Caribbean sun.
Keen divers can take advantage of the island’s Jean-Michel Cousteau Dive Centre. Whether you’re a beginner or a certified diver, you’re sure to find a site — be it a reef, marine park or local wreck — that suits you. Expect to see lobsters, eagle rays, turtles and even the odd nurse shark.
Whether you’re a beginner or a certified diver, you’ll find a spot that suits you (Picture: Petit St Vincent)
If you’re more comfortable on the sea than under it, you can set sail on Beauty — a 49ft sloop — and head over to Tobago Cays with skipper Jeff Stevens. The stunning archipelago has some of the prettiest coral reefs around, making it one of the best spots for snorkelling.
You can look forward to spotting turtles — we spotted four in one session — and spend what never seems like long enough trying to quietly stalk them as they effortlessly swim away.
Once swimming with turtles is ticked off your bucket list you can climb back aboard Beauty and enjoy a barbecue of freshly caught seafood right there on the deck. Those so inclined may even partake in a rum punch or two while you slowly sail back through the cays and wonder why you ever booked a return flight.
Sailing to Tobago Cays aboard Beauty (Picture: Brett Leppard)
When your adventure on the sea is concluded those needing to wind down from all the excitement can visit the Hillside Spa. Complete with a team of Balinese therapists and a calm ocean view, wellness-seekers can pick from a wide variety of treatments and body scrubs — some are even available in your cottage if you don’t fancy climbing the hill.
After building up a mighty appetite you could choose to dine in your cottage or venture up to the main restaurant on the hill, which boasts an extensive wine cellar.
Expect a smart casual setting lit by candles and the stars, accompanied by an international menu with a rightfully Caribbean focus. Between the seafood linguine with a hint of chilli, the steam tuna with soy-sake mirin sauce or the slow roasted pork loin, there’s something for everyone on this menu.
For something more relaxed, Goatie’s beach bar and restaurant gives you everything from calamari rings and jerk chicken to yellow fin tuna and conch fritters. There’s even a beach barbecue held each week, possibly the best night of the week, where you can get your hands on mahi-mahi and lobster tail.
Where to stay
The cottages at Petit St Vincent are the perfect combination of rugged and luxury, making the transition from beach to bed feel as natural as can be. Between the volcanic stone walls and Italian linens, you almost feel bad for not spending more time inside.
There’s an emphasis on natural interiors (Picture: Petit St Vincent)
Some villas are up high on the hill with spectacular ocean views, others are on the beach allowing you to stay entirely in your own world if you so please. You can even dine-in (we highly recommend having breakfast by the sea), and when surrounded by such beauty why wouldn’t you?
Enjoy the views from your deck (Picture: Rory Doyle, Petit St Vincent)
The PSV Peninsula — a collection of four cottages on the east side of the island — is also available for friends and family looking to reunite in peace and safety away from other guests. If you’re seeking tranquillity after months of chaos, this is the place.
Rates at Petit St. Vincent start from $1,200 (£870) per room per night, based on two sharing a one bedroom cottage in low season. Includes three meals daily, all non-alcoholic beverages, the use of non-motorised water sports and all facilities at the resort. For further information, visit petitstvincent.com or call +1 (954) 963 7401.
Even if my beautiful boy can’t say it, I know that Brody loves me – his affection doesn’t require words (Picture: Laura Rutherford)
If you meet my eight-year-old son Brody, you will notice many things; his ability to light up a room, his joy at the small things in life – and, eventually, the fact that he is non-verbal.
Side note: this does not mean that he is quiet.
Earlier this week, as I was watching season two of The Umbrella Academy, a particular storyline hit home; the one of Harlan and his mum Sissy. Like my son, Harlan is a young boy who doesn’t talk, and the assumption from many viewersis that he has autism.
I don’t have to tell you that every child and family is different, but some parts of the story reminded me of my own experience of raising Brody. Born with a rare genetic condition, autism and epilepsy, my son’s lack of speech is one of the aspects of his disability that can be very hard to cope with at times.
It’s difficult to describe how helpless you feel as a parent when your child is unwell or upset, and you don’t know why. Not being able to find out what Brody wants for birthdays or at Christmas also makes me incredibly sad.
And not hearing my name – or ‘mum’ – endlessly repeated or an ‘I love you’ took some getting used to.
Although it can be tough seeing characters like Harlan on TV, it is hugely refreshing to see our ‘normal’ portrayed in a mainstream show (Picture: Christos Kalohoridis/Netflix)
These are things that others take for granted. But we, the parents of children who cannot speak, learn to read non-verbal cues and body language and, quite frankly, we wing it.
Communication isn’t just speech. Even if my beautiful boy can’t say it, I know that Brody loves me – his affection doesn’t require words. He tells me in other ways. He laughs, he smiles and blows raspberries. Sometimes we look each other in the eye and laugh and it’s like we are the only ones in on the joke.
To most people, it quickly becomes obvious that Brody doesn’t talk, perhaps because of the noises he makes or due to his behaviour and mannerisms, such as his excited, flapping arms.
But for some – like people behind checkouts who kindly ask him what his name is – it doesn’t click straight away.
I usually introduce Brody to them and explain that he can’t answer back. He speaks to them in his own way and more often than not he’ll blow them a kiss (he’s a charmer).
There is often an assumption that a person who can’t talk, doesn’t understand, which isn’t true. Brody understands lots of things and demonstrates this with his actions, like getting his shoes when I tell him we are going out.
There are challenges, though.
Brody often gets upset because he can’t tell me when something is wrong, which only doubles his frustration. He then shows his emotions by hitting his head, throwing things and occasionally biting.
Similarly, in episode three, Harlan becomes frustrated when he can’t work the record player and displays these same behaviours. I could relate.
If there’s one thing I’ve learned as a parent to a disabled child is that humour is essential (Picture: Laura Rutherford)
I cope with the bad days with laughter. To give an example, I chuckled when Harlan’s dad, who after being told to watch his language in front his son, said ‘if that boy said son of a bitch, I’d buy him a BB gun’.
I’ve shamefacedly been there once or twice in the past myself, when my mum has chastised me for releasing an f-bomb in front of my son and I’ve retorted with a similar comment (minus the BB gun, obviously).
Is it appropriate? Maybe not – but if there’s one thing I’ve learned as a parent to a disabled child is that humour is essential.
Like some other children with autism, Brody is a flight risk and doors need to be locked at all times. He also has a common fascination with water, whereby he would just walk into something out of his depth without a care in the world.
Having a child with no danger awareness is absolutely terrifying. Standard helicopter parents have nothing on me – I operate at Chinook level.
You develop eyes at the back of your head and live life on high alert, in case your child unintentionally puts themselves at risk. It’s exhausting.
Although it can be tough seeing characters like Harlan on TV, it is hugely refreshing to see our ‘normal’ portrayed in a mainstream show.
There is always the danger that people with disabilities will be stereotyped, but the risk of this decreases with raised awareness of spectrum conditions such as autism, and researchers becoming more in tune with their audience.
I am confident that more disabled characters – and disabled actors for that matter – need to be represented on our TV screens.
We are not all the same and that’s not a bad thing.
I’ll leave you with one of my favourite quotes by Van Gogh – ‘normality is a paved road: it’s comfortable to walk on, but no flowers grow on it’. Boy was he right.
Gemma Markland has spent £50,000 giving her four-bedroom family home an entirely pink makeover (Picture: PA Real Life)
Why go for a single splash of colour when you can turn your entire home into a pink-tinted haven?
Gemma Markland, 30, is a fan of pink.
She really, really likes it. So much so that she has spent more than £50,000 giving her four-bedroom family home in Wigan, Greater Manchester, an entirely pink makeover.
The mum spent months trawling shops for pink and rose gold furnishings before she had even bought her first home, which ended up being a £330,000 four-bedroom detached propery she bought in September 2019.
Within two hours of moving in, Gemma had painted the white walls pink.
She’s now overjoyed at the super-pink end result of months of hard work, loving life in a pink paradise with her husband, Kyle, 28, and daughter Grace, 10.
Gemma’s daughter’s bedroom (Picture: PA Real Life)
Gemma said: ‘I must have spent about £50,000 on accessories and furnishings to make my house 100% pink.
‘I do try to save where I can, though, so everything has been DIY. For the past 11 months, we have dedicated spare moments, like evenings and weekends, to redecorating.
“’yle laughs at me, as I will happily spend £1,000 on a table to make sure it’s the perfect shade of pink, but I won’t pay for someone to do our wallpapering.”
Gemma, who owns her own company making bespoke bridal gowns, decided to go all out on the pink after years spent renting, where she had to put up with plain grey interiors she couldn’t decorate.
The bathroom (Picture: PA Real Life)
When, in 2019, Gemma bought her first home, she knew she wanted it to be pink throughout – but her husband wasn’t too enthusiastic at first.
Once she eased him in with a pink bedroom for Grace and a pink office, though, Kyle was on board.
‘I’ve always loved pink – but the blush and rose gold tones, rather than the Barbie bubblegum pink,’ says Gemma.
‘Kyle and I even had a blush and rose gold colour scheme at our wedding so, of course, there was only one colour I wanted to decorate our first home.
‘At first, he wasn’t on board with living in a pink house, so I told him it’d just be Grace’s bedroom and my office.
‘As soon as I started buying accessories, though, he changed his mind. Everybody always asks me how I got my husband to agree to live in this pink paradise, but he likes it and thinks it looks great.’
Kyle wasn’t a fan at first, but quickly grew to love the interiors (Picture: PA Real Life)
The makeover took months of careful pink-hunting and DIY jobs, with Gemma building up her collection bit by bit.
When she found pieces of furniture she loved, but that didn’t fit the colour theme, she just spray painted it. Smart.
As progress began to rack up, Gemma set up an Instagram account to inspire others to embrace their interiors dreams.
The mum said: ‘I still can’t quite believe I’m at nearly 100,000 followers. I never thought I’d even get 1,000.
‘I wanted to show people what the reality of buying and decorating a new build was like, but I think the fact my house is completely pink is really unique and catches people’s eyes when they’re scrolling.
‘People tell me my pictures are very aesthetically pleasing, which makes me happy, as the showroom look is exactly what I was going for.
‘Grace absolutely loves it, too, and is always telling people to follow me.’
The dressing room is Gemma’s favourite space (Picture: PA Real Life)
Gemma is delighted with her furniture, which mostly comes from Ikea and her soft furnishings, which are from a wide range of stores, but her favourite spot in the house is her dressing room.
As well as a pink carpet, rug, plush chair and several stylish decorations, it also houses a huge wardrobe, with all her perfectly presented blush-toned clothes on display.
She also loves the pink marble-effect wallpaper in her bedroom, bought online from Wallpaper Sales, and her blush-toned sofa.
‘Because I display my pink clothes and pack everything else away in drawers, it looks like I have a 100% pink wardrobe,’ she said.
‘Actually, I don’t wear as much pink as you’d think. I’m not quite at that level yet – I’ve got blue jeans and dark T-shirts like everybody else.
‘Similarly, I posted a picture of my car not long ago, which is blue and I got so many comments saying how surprised people were that I didn’t have a pink car.’
Gemma still has some bits and bobs to do to make the house complete, including replacing her silver range cooker and making the dining area more open plan.
But in the meantime, she’s living a pink-toned dream.
If you’re a Londoner longing for outdoor space after months in lockdown, you’re not the only one.
But while many of us are just dreaming wistfully of gardens, some citydwellers are planning a proper move out to the countryside, according to a new report from Rightmove.
The property website says across June and July, the number of buyer inquiries from people living in ten major cities, such as London and Birmingham, has risen by 78% compared with the same period last year.
And contacts from city residents about buying a home in a village increased by 126%.
The number of inquiries from Liverpool residents looking to buy a home in a village has almost tripled (up by 275%) from last year, for example, while in Edinburgh, village inquiries are up 205% and in Birmingham they’re up by 186%.
The village of Linton (Picture: Getty Images)
Before you assume this is just down to price (after all, buying a home in a city tends to be extremely expensive), Rightmove says that this doesn’t actually seem to be the main motive for the moves, as average asking prices in the villages receiving queries are more expensive than in cities.
People in Birmingham, where homes cost £212,661 on average, for example, have been looking into moving to Marlbrook, where homes go for £367,854.
The villages where people from cities want to move:
People living in Birmingham most want to move to Marlbrook, Worcestershire
People in Bristol want to move to Banwell, Somerset
People in Edinburgh want to move to West Linton, Peeblesshire
People in Glasgow want to move to Bridge of Weir, Renfrewshire
People in Leicester want to move to Markfield, Leicestershire
People in Liverpool want to move to Aughton, Lancashire
People in London want to move to Iver, Buckinghamshire
People in Manchester want to move to Charlesworth, Derbyshire
People in Nottingham want to move to East Leake, Leicestershire
People in Sheffield want to move to Whiston, South Yorkshire
And it’s not about job moves, either – the report says that many of the village locations city-based house hunters are interested in are within commuting distance to the city where they currently live, suggesting they’d like to keep their career in the city but have a quieter, slower way of life.
Rightmove’s property expert Miles Shipside said: ‘The lure of a new lifestyle, one that is quieter and has an abundance of beautiful countryside and more outdoor space, has led to more city dwellers choosing to become rural residents.
‘We saw a shift as early as April in more people living in cities inquiring about moving out of that city, and this trend has continued.
We’re ready for a slower pace (Picture: Getty Images)
‘The most popular village moves are still within the same region the home hunters are currently in, as it’s likely they’ll keep their current job but may have the flexibility to commute less often and set up their working space at home.”
Mark Rimell, director in Strutt & Parker’s country house department, said: ‘A slower pace of life, outdoor space and tight-knit communities come hand in hand with village living – something many have come to appreciate in recent months and have enduring appeal.’
These stats come as a survey from Barclays Mortgages suggests that reasons for people wanting to relocate post-pandemic include wanting a bigger garden, being closer to essential services, and a stronger local community.
Life in lockdown may have made us sick of city life and overpriced rentals, with months spent cooped up indoors leaving us longing for gardens and a slower pace.
The rise of remote working, meanwhile, has many of us questioning why we’re paying more to live near the office when we can do the same role from home.
Dr Peter Brooks, chief behavioural scientist at Barclays said: ‘More outside space and the benefits of being closer to friends and family are high on the must-have list for many movers.
‘As working from home becomes more commonplace moving cross-country looks to be more achievable for many as there is less of a need to be within a short commute to the office.’
This is what true love looks like (Picture: Getty)
Tired of falling in love with someone only to find out they hate your pet? Yeah, us too.
A new dating app aims to remedy that, though, and is solely for lovers and owners of cats.
Tabby launched today to coincide with International Cat Day, made by the creators of sister app Dig – for dog lovers.
The app – which is currently available on iOS and Android, or can be accessed on their website – was created by sisters Leigh and Casey Isaacson and allows users to organise dates alongside kitty playdates.
Like a ‘normal’ dating app you’ll put in your details, but you can also add those of your cat. There will be deals from pet companies and spotlighted cat-based events near you.
You don’t have to be a cat owner to be on the app (Picture: Tabby)
Essentially, if your fur baby is life it’s the app for you.
After a study earlier this year found that men with cats in dating app profile pictures get fewer matches, the Tabby creators decide to flip the cat lady stereotype, so influencers Sterling ‘TrapKing’ Davis and Nathan Kehn, aka Nathan the Cat Lady, are the app’s official spokespeople.
‘I know first hand what it’s like to be sitting across from the person you care about, and have them look you in the eyes, and tell you that they want to be with you, but they don’t want to live with cats,” said Nathan, a father of four cats
‘That’s a decision that I don’t want anyone to ever have to face ever again.’
Sterling added: ‘I want guys to know that showing compassion and rescuing cats is a great thing.
‘If I can show other men that there are people out there who really appreciate what they’re doing – maybe we can help them find love AND find more cats homes at the same time!’
On top of that, aportion of proceeds from Tabby benefits cat rescue groups and cats featured on @TabbyDates social media accounts and in marketing campaigns are available for adoption.
Just make sure whoever you match with isn’t only in it for the pussy.
At best, I felt a bit out of place here. At worst, I felt positively unwelcome (Picture: Serena Smith)
I grew up in the town of Malvern in Worcestershire, which is famed for its rolling hills.
It’s also 93.2 per cent white, it voted to Leave the EU in the 2016 referendum, and its constituents have never voted anything but Tory – a party that introduced the ‘hostile environment policy’ in order to reduce immigration.
As a young half-Mauritian, half-British girl, at best, I felt a bit out of place. At worst, I felt positively unwelcome.
It wasn’t until I moved to a big city that I truly felt more myself – like my skin colour wasn’t the first thing people registered when they looked at me, or a part of my identity that eclipsed everything else.
To some extent, Malvern will always be ‘home’ to me. Whenever I see the views from the top of the hills, I’m reminded of how lucky I am to have close ties with such a beautiful part of the world. But it’s impossible not to feel painfully conscious of my skin colour when my family are on a walk and we’re the only people of colour in sight.
A report published in September last year by the Department for Environment, Food & Rural Affairs found that both Black, Asian and Minority Ethnic (BAME) people and white people perceive the countryside as a predominantly white environment.
Growing up, I was keenly aware of inhabiting a brown body in a white space. I was the only brown girl at Pony Club or Brownies and that took its toll.
When you’re young, all you want to do is to fit in and I desperately wanted to assimilate. I drew myself as if I were white, colouring using pink felt tips or the so-called ‘skin colour’ – that is, peach-coloured – pencil.
As a teenager, I ramped up the brightness on all my selfies until I looked positively ghostly. And when I was old enough, I attempted to dye my hair blonde. Unfortunately for me, ethnic hair can be stubborn and the result was – as any hairdresser could have predicted – a violent shade of orange.
But who could blame me? On top of seeing white girls in cartoons and magazines, I saw white girls everywhere in real life. I just wanted to blend in and be like everybody else.
Now that I’ve moved away, I can appreciate Malvern a lot more (Picture: Serena Smith)
I moved to Leeds for university the same year I finished school. At the time, I don’t think I realised that I needed to leave my tiny, rural town to come to terms with my racial identity. I thought I just wanted to move somewhere that had a town centre more exciting than a strip of charity shops and a single Costa.
Looking back, I think I was subconsciously yearning for more diversity. I was tired of looking around and seeing no one that reflected my experiences.
I enjoyed the sense of anonymity I got walking through Leeds – I didn’t stick out like a sore thumb anymore. I also met other girls who’d had similar experiences to me, which was the biggest comfort of all.
We could talk and just know that we understood one another. There was no pressure to explain ourselves. Whether we needed to rant about a guy making ignorant comments in seminars or vent about daily microaggressions, there was a natural understanding between us, which just made everything so easy.
I’d never felt like this in Malvern – I’d always felt different, or ‘apart’ somehow. In Leeds, meeting more and more women who looked like me, I finally felt like I belonged somewhere.
This isn’t to say that British cities are post-racism utopias – but I certainly felt liberated by moving away from the remote English countryside. I felt much less anxious and much more confident.
When I went home for Christmas after my first term, my friends noticed a change in me. They all said the same thing – it wasn’t so much that I was different, it was that I was more myself.
I still love Leeds as much as I did when I turned up four years ago as a wide-eyed fresher: the sprawling summer afternoons on Woodhouse Moor; the skyline glittering from the top of Headrow House; the first, delicious bite into a fresh sandwich from Bakery 164.
There’s always a buzz about Leeds – in many ways, it’s the total opposite to sleepy, languid Malvern.
But now that I’ve moved away, I can appreciate Malvern a lot more. After months on end surrounded by concrete, I do find myself missing the vast fields of grass and stretches of hills, and look forward to my visits home.
It’s still hard being under the all-pervasive white gaze when I’m back though – and spending lockdown in Malvern has been testing – but it’s getting easier. Moving to a city has made me more sure of myself and less concerned with what others may or may not be thinking.
In other words, I’m more comfortable in my own brown skin.
Some of the items from the full collection (Picture: Vans x The Simpsons)
Streetwear brand Vans has created a limited edition collection paying tribute to The Simpsons.
The range features over 60 pieces featuring Homer, Marge, Bart, Lisa and Maggie as well as other favourite characters.
Vans launched a Simpsons range back in 2007 but these are all new designs for the 2020.
You can get ComfyCrush slip-on shoes featuring the cast from Springfield all over or different styles featuring just one or two characters, like textured Old Skool shoes showing the Bouvier sisters.
There’s clothing items and accessories too – including a backpack with the classic Vans check print and the faces of The Simpsons family woven in, or a bucket hat with an eyeballs screen print.
The all-over Springfield print (Picture: Vans x The Simpsons)
The Bouvier sisters shoes (Picture: Vans x The Simpsons)
For kids, there’s a range of different patterns. We love the tribute to the family pets or the 3D Blinky the Fish slip on shoes for toddlers.
And if you don’t see anything you like in the collection, there’s also a whole range of Simpsons prints in the customise area so you can design your own shoes.
For kids, there’s a tribute to the family pets (Picture: Vans x The Simpsons)
Some fans loved the collaboration and were desperate to get their hands on their favourite pieces.
Responding to posts about it on their social media page, one person said: ‘I’ve never wanted to buy a shirt more.’
The El Barto shoes (Picture: Vans x The Simpsons)
Another added: ‘Oh my god I’m excited. I need those El Barto shoes. And that Krusty Burger hat.’
But others had a few complaints once they saw the release.
One person said: ‘Am I the only one a bit disappointed? Not much for women I think. I was only looking trainers and they’re a bit expensive.’
The limited edition shoes do come at a a bit of a premium – for example, the Simpsons ComfyCush slip-on shoes cost £70 compared to £57 for the same shoe in the classic checked style.
However, the prices are in line with other recent collaborations Vans has done. Itcy & Scratchy Era shoes, for example, are the same price as the Era shoes in the National Geographic collection.
Others said they loved the kids patterns and were disappointed that they weren’t in adult sizes – but some fans pointed out they were available in the customise section so you could create your own bigger version.
I realised I was different at five years old. If I fell over, it wouldn’t just be a graze on my knee, my skin would actually just rip off.
Only 5,000 people in the United Kingdom have Epidermolysis Bullosa (EB), a rare skin condition that causes wounds and chronic scars – and I am one of them.
I was born with the worst type – recessive dystrophic epidermolysis bullosa – and I have lived with it for 32 years.
When I was a child in the school playground, I had to have an an assistant to help me and my friends had to be very careful when interacting with me. I just accepted it as I didn’t know life any other way. Even by the age of 10, I was used to explaining to everyone what my condition was.
Hospital visits became normal, almost like seeing your second family.
EB means constant pain and scarring has caused my hands to mitten – which simply means when I was younger my fingers were open and I had a lot of dexterity, but with increased scarring the fingers have closed into fists.
Now, I require regular plastic surgery to release my fingers to give me the ability to do basic tasks like hold a fork, type, hold a cup – daily tasks that most people take for granted.
As my condition is so rare, most people assume I have burns (Picture: Myra Ali)
Little things like blinking and eating can be difficult due to excessive swelling and scarring. There have been countless occasions where I could hardly open and close my eyelids, so surgeons had to take skin grafts from my arm or stomach.
I have also had surgery to allow me to eat without choking, as scarring made it near impossible. I was struggling to even swallow a cookie dunked in tea.
As my condition is so rare, most people assume I have burns and the way people react to me really varies.
You have the people who are worried they could hurt me, so I’m always the first to offer to shake their hand.
I’m regularly asked if I was allowed to go to school, or whether I can work, or if it’s too dangerous. At times, all the questions can feel relentless and I just don’t want to talk about it.
Then there’s the people who think they know what is best for me. Uber journeys are often accompanied by the drivers telling me the cure can be found in shrines in the Middle East and Pakistan. There’s also the people who tell me I just need to eat certain superfoods to heal my skin.
I’m like any other woman who has the same needs and desires in life. I just happen to have a very visible condition (Picture: Susannah Ireland)
They mean well, but I know that there is no cure for my condition yet.
My skin has often been described as ‘fragile as a butterfly’s wing’. However, as an adult in my thirties, I really dislike it when people say, ‘Oh you have butterfly skin’ or ‘You’re a butterfly girl’.
That’s not who I am – I’m like any other woman who has the same needs and desires in life. I just happen to have a very visible condition. I’m certainly no ethereal fairy or unicorn and I certainly don’t need pity.
If I had to be described as anything for the things I’ve dealt with in my life, it would be a lioness.
I’m currently working as a freelance celebrity journalist. I write articles and interview celebrities at press junkets and red carpet events. At the same time I live with family and I have nurses who come to the house to do my dressings.
EB feels like you are in a long-term battle. You are constantly fighting with your skin – the pain, the wounds, the scarring. You have to be strong to cope with it and how I get that power is by being grateful I’m not in a worse position.
I’m able to work and be as independent as I can be. Other people are suffering a lot more.
Living with EB has made me stoic and given me a lot of inner strength. (Picture: Susannah Ireland)
One of the worst times of my life was last year. I was diagnosed with skin cancer, which I was told was always a risk with my skin condition. My surgeon removed the cancer, and for two weeks I had an artificial skin graft on my whole hand.
I then had to have further surgery, where they replaced this with skin taken from my stomach. This was extremely painful and I was taking morphine every two hours.
The pain after this operation was excruciating and I had the added emotional worry of wanting to know when I would be cancer free. After a month, I was given the all clear and I felt very relieved.
However, living with EB has made me stoic and given me a lot of inner strength. So, when I was discharged, I was back at work a week later – I interviewed Michael B Jordan and Jamie Foxx for their film Just Mercy.
I remember feeling self-conscious because I had a huge, surgical hand bandage on. When greeting the actors, Jamie Foxx opted to shake my unbandaged left hand, but I just kept it simple and went to kiss cheeks with both of them instead.
I find it far easier to educate and talk about my skin in a positive and very real light on Instagram. My Instagram account has attracted people from all over the world. They write to me if they suffer from conditions similar to mine, or even if they just struggle with low confidence.
One woman reached out to me who had suffered sexual abuse and told me that after reading my story she felt she could talk about her own trauma. It was difficult to read her story, but I’m glad I can be a beacon for others.
EB may control how I live my life, but I control my story.
In this exciting new series from Metro.co.uk, What It Feels Like… not only shares one person’s moving story, but also the details and emotions entwined within it, to allow readers a true insight into their life changing experience.
Taking her current three bottles of No7 Stay Perfect foundation, she added a little boiling water into each one.
She then shook it up until the foundation loosened and came away from the sides.
She emptied the whole thing into a clean tub and then waited for the water to separate on top. Once the water came to the top, she poured it off to leave the foundation underneath.
Later, someone in the comments even recommended using a clean sponge to soak up the water rather than pouring it.
Rose posted pictures showing the empty bottles and the makeup she’d got out – enough for a few more applications.
The empty bottles (Picture: Extreme Couponing and Bargains UK group)
Her particular foundation separated as the makeup contains silicone but it’s important to be aware that other brands that are more water-based might not separate in the same way, leaving the makeup a little runnier.
People in the comments recommended putting the bottle in hot water to move the makeup from the sides and then turning it upside down to get the last bits out if the foundation is more waterbased.
The leftover foundation (Picture: Extreme Couponing and Bargains UK group)
However, some people did warn that putting it in a tub could spread harmful bacteria.
To reduce the risk, it’s important that the tub is completely sanitised before you put the makeup in. You can wash it in hot soapy water or run it through a dishwasher first.
And it’s best to only do this with your most recent bottle so you are only using a little at a time.
Use up everything in your tub before opening a new bottle rather than saving up all the leftover bits to use in one go.
Rose said that the picture was of bottles she had been using and was just finishing up.
Some people highlighted that older bottles you have lying around might also be past their best before date, so just throw them away, rather than using this trick.
A few people also recommended using a little clean scoop to take it out of the tub each time or if you are going to use your hands, make sure they are cleaned each time you put your finger in.
And of course, if you use foundation in a plastic tube rather than a bottle, you can cut the end off the top to get all the last bits out instead.
Zoe, and right, the message she received (Picture: Triangle News)
A support worker was upset and disgusted when she received a topless picture after offering to help out with a mental health group.
Zoe Cain sent a message to The Happiness Project on Instagram and asked if she could help with social media posts.
The page was set up by Joshua Martin Hudson in 2017 and now has 370,000 followers on Facebook and 51,000 on Instagram.
The 29-year-old felt her experience would be relevant as she is a mental health support worker in her day job and has struggled with her own issues.
But a few days after contacting them, she was sent a photo of a man’s chest and told she could sell it as a “t** picture” on her OnlyFans account.
Zoe also works as a model and runs a page on the OnlyFans site, charging people to view often explicit pictures and videos.
She felt the organisation was mocking her for her for her adult profile.
Zoe, from Anglesey, Wales, said: ‘I’ve suffered from mental health issues, I’m a big advocate for supporting people’s mental health.
The first messages Zoe sent (Picture: Triangle News)
‘For someone in that position, with such a large number of followers, it’s really inappropriate.
‘Someone like that shouldn’t be anywhere near other people’s mental health issues if that’s the way they behave.
‘His behaviour completely contradicted everything that organisation stands for.’
Originally Zoe messaged them on Instagram and said: ‘I love your page and your work and I’m wondering if there’s any way I can be involved at all?
‘I’ve suffered with mental health and experienced family members with different things and I’m also a mental health support worker so would love to be part of your movement.’
She initially had a positive response, was given a mobile number to contact and was told she could help post content.
The topless picture she received (Picture: Triangle News)
However when communicating through Whatsapp, she was shocked to receive the topless picture.
The Happiness Project account said: ‘I reckon you could sell that as a t** picture on your Only Fans and people wouldn’t know the difference.
‘Chest pump is real today.’
When Zoe asked whether that was professional, the man responded: ‘I was only having a laugh.’
Shocked Zoe then blocked the number in case she received any more pictures.
She said: ‘I reached out in a professional manner, and he sent that out of the blue.’
Zoe responded by blocking the number (Picture: Triangle News)
‘My modelling has nothing to do with this side of my work.’
With more than 33,000 followers on Instagram, she hoped to use her profile to spread awareness and highlight support for mental health issues.
She has suffered from depression and anxiety since she was a little girl, and revealed members of her family have also had problems.
Since January, she has worked as a support worker helping people with various mental health issues.
Earlier this year, she had been ‘in a really dark place’ but says after taking medication and a period of recovery, she felt she was back on track.
After coming through that, she felt the time was right to do more to help others going through the same time.
Zoe Cain (Picture: Triangle News)
Zoe had volunteered with mental health charity Mind, but after coming across the Happiness Project, she wanted to offer some support there too.
‘It’s a big thing for me to be a voice and a beacon of hope to others,’ she said.
‘I have experienced the lows and I want to help other people know they can get up from anything.’
After receiving the messages, Zoe posted about her experience on social media.
Charlotte Tolley said: ‘This is absolutely sickening, disrespectful and unprofessional.
‘Can’t believe it. Well unfortunately I (sic) can because it’s yet another man thinking it’s OK to send muscle pics and insult you for no reason.’
Ramona Younan slammed: ‘Oh how disrespectful and disheartening for so many that look for these avenues to help or for help!’
The Happiness Project has now aplogised to Zoe over the incident.
Joshua Martin Hudson said: ‘The photograph was sent as nothing more than a joke in response to me being in the gym.
‘I do fully appreciate that this was not acceptable and have offered my deepest apologies.
‘I do understand my sense of humour in this instance was not acceptable.
‘I take full responsibility for it being inappropriate and can not apologise enough.
‘The Happiness Project provided content that aims to eradicate the loneliness and isolation that people often feel and help them feel a little less alone during difficult times.’
When I did eat, I did it so fast that I didn’t taste the food (Picture: Jessica Spencer)
At one of my lowest points with my eating disorder, just thinking about food was enough to induce a panic attack.
I was 21 and had spent years feeling ashamed of myself for being overweight. Now I was avoiding eating until it hurt, suffering painful stomach cramps from hunger and feeling like a failure for wanting food.
When I did eat, I did it so fast that I didn’t taste the food. Overwhelming heart palpitations would then take hold, lasting anywhere up to an hour, as I got incredibly upset with myself for not being dedicated to losing weight.
Whilst awful and scary, these episodes at least helped me to admit what I had known for seven years: that I was overweight with an eating disorder.
I was 14 when I decided I wanted to be a presenter on television, but the only ones I saw were thin and glamorous. In contrast, I wore ugly, loose clothing to hide my fat.
I thought that if I wanted the job, I needed the body and believed losing weight would make everything easier.
After learning about calorie counting online, I cut my daily intake over the space of two months until it was eventually halved.
Proudness bubbled in me as everyone marvelled at my sudden thinness. I was thrilled with my progress. For the first time in months, I felt pretty.
I found I couldn’t control myself (Picture: Jessica Spencer)
There was just one issue – every time I stood up, I got overwhelmingly dizzy. An instant headache formed and my sight momentarily blacked out.
These episodes were incredibly scary. When I brought it up, my grandmother told me straight that I wasn’t eating enough so I tried to eat more.
After a couple of months, however, things went in the opposite direction.
I found I couldn’t control myself, specifically around chocolate, and ate massive amounts.
All the pride I had felt was replaced by yet more shame. I stopped counting calories, afraid to know how much I had eaten and from that point until I was in my early 20s, I found myself in a cycle, swinging between under-eating and binge-eating.
I was so upset at how out of control I felt around chocolate that I began searching online for answers. That was how I discovered binge-eating disorder, a mental illness where people regularly lose control and eat large quantities of food.
The term ‘binge-eating’ made me feel disgusted. I thought I just needed to practice self-control and forced myself to cut down again.
I started studying for a media degree but my anxiety and depression were both ramping up. I felt out of place as the fattest person in my course and in my first semester, I failed a module I had barely attended due to my worsening mental health.
I went to my GP and told him everything (Picture: Jessica Spencer)
By 19, therapy seemed like the only option. I spoke about my feelings being fat but avoided discussing my habits around food – and my continued reliance on chocolate.
Periods of under-eating lasted weeks while my binge-eating could last months. And while binging, I put a lot of pressure on myself, telling myself I was worthless for being fat.
The idea that I had an eating disorder had been floating around my head but I wouldn’t let myself accept it. I thought only thin people had disordered eating and my look didn’t fit the part.
I was convinced I was too fat to be ill and besides, losing weight was beneficial for my health and career. This wasn’t an illness, I told myself – not eating was self-care.
Everything came to a head one day when I was at the hairdresser. She asked me to stand, I fainted and when I came round, I was screaming for my mother.
My BMI was bordering on healthy yet I was miserable and tired of being consumed by my weight and food. If dropping dress sizes wasn’t enough,I realised I would never be thin enough until I was dead.
Exhausted, I went to my GP and told him everything.
As I started speaking, it felt as if space was opening in my chest and I could finally breathe again. I left my appointment armed with a new prescription for anti-depressants and a diagnosis : Other Specified Feeding and Eating Disorder, known as OSFED.
The condition is a catch-all for anyone with disordered eating who doesn’t fit the criteria of other illnesses, such as anorexia or bulimia.Accounting for 47% of all cases, it is the most common eating disorder diagnosis. Over half a million people in the UK are believed to suffer from OSFED.
Restricting calories to lose weight was a symptom of anorexia, but losing control around food – chocolate in my case – was indicative of binge-eating disorder. For me, OSFED came from this mixture.
The shame I felt at trying and failing to reach a healthy weight was constant (Picture: Jessica Spencer)
I educated myself on eating disorders and stopped engaging with destructive online communities that promoted thinness. I no longer counted calories, repeatedly telling myself ‘You are allowed to eat’ like a mantra, and it helped to stop the palpitations.
I also took a year out of my degree to focus on myself. Removing the pressure of my studies helped immensely as it gave me extra time to relax by indulging in my hobbies, such as blogging and poetry.
The anti-depressants kicked in within the first couple of months, too and I gradually came to feel more at ease in my body, even starting to appreciate it.
When you are thin and you lose weight, people worry. But when I started to slim down, I was congratulated for taking care of myself.
Having an eating disorder is an awful experience and I have no doubt that being overweight made it worse. The shame I felt at trying and failing to reach a healthy weight was constant.
Under-eating was never sustainable and anything I lost usually snuck back on just as quickly.
To lose weight in a healthy way we should turn to doctors, not the internet – what I learned online about calorie counting developed into a seven year illness. Weight loss is as simple as eating well and exercising in moderation – anything else is punishing yourself.
It has been four years since I was diagnosed with OSFED. While I sometimes still look to chocolate for comfort, I no longer binge. I stop to consider whether my urge to eat it is a reaction to stress or a normal craving. When it’s stress, I look at other ways to relax, like reading or watching a film.
I have also recently taken up running but my focus is on my fitness – not my weight. Getting fit is about trying to make life easier on my body, not harder.
No matter what the scales say, I have learned to appreciate my body and everything it does to keep me alive.
Recovery is a journey about choosing to live and every day, I choose recovery.
GET SUPPORT
For more information and support on any of the issues raised in this article, visit eating disorder charity Beat’s website, or ring the helpline on 0808 801 0677.
